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Your Kid's Friends

Posted by on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:40 AM
  • 89 Replies

My daughter had a friend over to play yesterday and to be honest, I don't really like the kid.  They are in first grade, so she is just a little girl, and I feel like a jerk for not being one of those loving moms who treats all the kids like they are her own.

I thought she was bossy, abrasive, and had bad manners.  Of course she is ultimately just a 7 year old, no doubt I am over reacting.

Are you one of those moms that all the kids love, and you love them all, or are you easily irritated by kids?  Do you tell your kid who they should be friends with, or criticize their friends?  How do you handle kids you don't like?  It is obviously more important as they get older and do more stuff with friends outside the home.

Feel free to expound on any issue related to this.  This was only the second friend we have had visit.  I liked the first girl better better but unfortunately my daughter is bffs with the second girl.

by on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:40 AM
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Replies (1-10):
delilahsmom1177
by Bronze Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:47 AM
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I love all DD's friends. She is 5 and one of the most popular kids in her class. She just went to her BFF's party yesterday and had so much fun. All the oarents are wonderful.. I was upset her one friernd wasn't there because I talk with her mom. Last weekend we had a playdate at the "bouncy" place and the mom was awesome and so were her kids. I find myself wanting to cry sometimes when I see DD with her friends.... As stupid as this sounds I am jealous. I was hated in school and my DD is sooo popular. I am very happy though she won't go through what I went through,

I'm a tattooed,pagan,pro-choice,pro-legalizing marijuana,pro-gay marriage,anti-war,non-vaxing,tree hugging,animal loving,book reading,animal testing free,depression battling, trying to raise a free spirit and letting her be who she is but still teaching her important life lessons,fighting for equal rights at the same time,don't like it get over it.

coolmommy2x
by Gold Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:49 AM
I could've written this! DD is in 2nd grade and has been good friends with Sally since K.

I can not stand Sally! She is bossy, mean, loud, aggressive, obnoxious...you name it, she's it. She constantly tells DS (12) that she can't stand him (thankfully he just brushes her off). I never encourage the girls to have playdates but about every other week they'll call us for one. The girls were on the same basketball team so every Sunday they wanted to play after the game.

The hard part is that I like her mom. And I feel bad for her because I know she tries to discipline Sally but sometimes I just think that girl is possessed.

And I feel quilty that I actually can't stand a child but I can't find much good in her. =(
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Veni.Vidi.Vici.
by on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:50 AM
1 mom liked this

We have a block full of neighbor kids. Some of them are friendly with my daughter and play here and others I see around the neighborhood, pool etc. I freely admit that the two girls my daughter plays with irk me. Like you I chalk it up to age. Their parents are lovely.

Veni.Vidi.Vici.
by on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:51 AM


Quoting coolmommy2x:

I could've written this! DD is in 2nd grade and has been good friends with Sally since K.

I can not stand Sally! She is bossy, mean, loud, aggressive, obnoxious...you name it, she's it. She constantly tells DS (12) that she can't stand him (thankfully he just brushes her off). I never encourage the girls to have playdates but about every other week they'll call us for one. The girls were on the same basketball team so every Sunday they wanted to play after the game.

The hard part is that I like her mom. And I feel bad for her because I know she tries to discipline Sally but sometimes I just think that girl is possessed.

And I feel quilty that I actually can't stand a child but I can't find much good in her. =(

Like I said in my reply, the girls parents are lovely. If I didn't like the parents I would likely never let DD play with their kids.  I have said no to playdates.

KristenFowles
by Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:52 AM
2 moms liked this

 I love my kids, and I'm great at relating to my kids.

I do not care for other kids.. they're like little aliens...  I don't know how to interacct with them, what to say.. NOTHING.

I have 3 kiddos, the oldest is in Kindergarten... so far I've dodged playdates..  However I have a lake house and I KNOW come summer Sky is going to want to have his buddies over.. and I need to allow it, and work on some acting chops to make sure his friends love coming over.. for Sky.  Becacuse when I was growing up, I had the house everyone wanted to be at.. and I loved it.. And it was thanks to my mother...   I need to do it for my own kids...........  But I dread it.  DREAD it. hahaha

                         


There is no way to be a perfect mother, and a million ways to be a good one.

Roo1234
by Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:52 AM
3 moms liked this
in general I don't like other people's kids and my daughter has had a couple of playdates that didn't go well. one ended with the mom walking in the door while the daughter ran in from the backyard yelling "i hate you calling me mean" to which my daughter was standing at the door " then don't act mean". ki thought for sure the mother was going to hate us both. Right years later the girls are still friends and we are very close to the family as a whole.

when any of my kids have guests, my only obligation is to make sure they are supervised and safe, beyond that I don't have to entertain, or even be liked, just nice and polite.
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EireLass
by Ruby Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:54 AM

When they were little, there were kids I thought were punks, and I frowned on them playing together. But I knew my own kids and knew they weren't going to be as weird. It was more about having a kid their age in the neighborhood. Really, it was the parents I didn't care for.

As teens, their friends used to think I was the cool Mom. I never did things with them...never 'hung out' with them, or bought them booze, cigs, etc....like stories we read about. My kids told me it was because I talked to them as people, not kids. And everything was an open subject in my home. We talked about relationships, sex, etc. I answered their questions. And my home was a very relaxed environment.

Now as adults, they continue to involve me with some of their friends. Which is good...both my kids live out of state, and their friends come in handy, ha. Like on their birthdays, etc, I've found out I got ripped off by calling local companies to order things for them. But by having their friends go and pick it up, or make selections on my behalf, it all works well. And their friends have always been welcome in my home.

TruthSeeker.
by Milami on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:54 AM
2 moms liked this

 My daughters BFF is whiny and bossy. I have no idea how they are even friends since they have virtually Nothing in common.

 We have her over to play and my daughter goes to her house to play.  As long as my daughter still wants her around she is welcome here.

Veni.Vidi.Vici.
by on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:55 AM


Quoting Roo1234:



when any of my kids have guests, my only obligation is to make sure they are supervised and safe, beyond that I don't have to entertain, or even be liked, just nice and polite.

This. I don't cater to my DD"s friends. Guests are not treated like royalty in this house. Also, I have sent kids home for being disrespectful.

stacymomof2
by Ruby Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:56 AM

Glad to hear your daughter has lots of nice friends!  It's good when you get along with the parents, too.

Quoting delilahsmom1177:

I love all DD's friends. She is 5 and one of the most popular kids in her class. She just went to her BFF's party yesterday and had so much fun. All the oarents are wonderful.. I was upset her one friernd wasn't there because I talk with her mom. Last weekend we had a playdate at the "bouncy" place and the mom was awesome and so were her kids. I find myself wanting to cry sometimes when I see DD with her friends.... As stupid as this sounds I am jealous. I was hated in school and my DD is sooo popular. I am very happy though she won't go through what I went through,


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