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So I'm bored sitting in my doc's waiting room. There is a conversation going on: this woman hasn't seen her grandson since January, and some of the other patients are aghast. They're saying that grandparents should have the same rights as parents, and encouraging her to sue for her rights. This is Kentucky, I'm not even sure that's possible here.

Thoughts on the rights of parents versus grandparents?
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 12:20 PM
Replies (41-50):
parentalrights1
by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 1:05 PM
Well if he did then he could give visitation.

Was there ever bad blood between your family and her?


Quoting trachmom312:

My BIL?? Hell no that would be to much work for him. 


Quoting parehatntalrights1:

Does he have visitation?





Quoting trachmom312:

In cases like my father in law I believe he should file for visitation of his Grandkids. My brother in law and his girlfriend broke up and now his ex won't let anyone in his family see the kids. My fil and my niece and nephew are really close. He is also an amazing Papa. But now cause she is pissed at my bil she is holding the kids hostage. 







Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
mikiemom
by Ruby Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 1:06 PM

 

Then his parents are just out of luck. If they grandparents want visitation they need to either work it out with mom or encourage dad to take his visitation. Sueing mom for visitation would be the wrong move to make.

Quoting trachmom312:

My BIL?? Hell no that would be to much work for him. 

Quoting parehatntalrights1:

Does he have visitation?


Quoting trachmom312:

In cases like my father in law I believe he should file for visitation of his Grandkids. My brother in law and his girlfriend broke up and now his ex won't let anyone in his family see the kids. My fil and my niece and nephew are really close. He is also an amazing Papa. But now cause she is pissed at my bil she is holding the kids hostage. 


 

 


 

GoddessNDaRuff
by Silver Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 1:09 PM

It is the right of the parents to decide who they will allow in their children's lives. If she has been cut off it's for a reason and no court should interfere with that. Grandparents should not have the rights of parents.

romanceparty4u
by Bronze Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 1:10 PM

Grandparents don't have inherent rights.......there have been dozens of cases that have lost in court. It's not your child, you have no rights to any child except your own.

fireangel5
by Gold Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 1:11 PM

Absolutely ridiculous. If there is a healthy positive relationship between parents and adult kids, helping financially, seeing grandkids, etc, would not be an issue. Forcing things never fosters healthy relationships.

My ex inlaws haven't had any contact with us since my ex gave up his rights and disappeared over 16 years ago. 

Not a peep from them, which is just fine. I would have never allowed my kids alone with them. I would have loved to tear them a new asshole if they had tried to sue me. 

I really do understand that there may be exceptions, there always are, but they are rare and should be handled on a case by case basis, not a blanket law.


Quoting parentalrights1:

You wouldn't believe the entitlement of some of them .

Dailystrength.com has a group called "parents of estranged adult children everywhere (peace)"

The victim mentality is mind boggling. Any suggestion that a grandparent could ever possibly be at fault is immediately deleted and the poster banned (even if a general statement or just a statement made about the personal experience of the poster)

There was even a thread where these people were calling to not only force their estranged adult children to spend holidays wih them, but to get ALIMONY from adult children.

Yes. These people believe that children should be legally required to make payments to their parents. One person was ranting about her millionaire daughter and how she should be legally required to share the money.

The amount of support was astounding. It's something you wouldn't think so many would agree with.

Can you imagine paying for both you and your husbands parents? Especially if they divorced and split into two households?


Quoting fireangel5:

I have to say, I like the idea of suing for child support if they can sue for visitation. I bet that would cause a lot of grandparents to think twice. 



Quoting parentalrights1:

Parents should have the right to limit contact with whomever they deem unfit to be around their children. It's their realonsibility.



We don't get to choose our parents. We shouldn't have to worry that when we choose to have a family that some relative related by accident of birth will have some right to our kids.



If they have rights how do we accomplish getting them to obey our rules? Can't just end a visit or avoid grandmas house for a while if she has rights. They can ignore our rules regarding food and just give kids stuff behind our backs.



Do we have to ask permission to move if grandparents have rights? What if each set lives in a different state? Whose responsibility is it to make visitation happen as far as driving to the kids or driving the kids to the grandparents?



Are we going to make grandparents pay child support?



People are so damn unicorny with this crap. It's gotten ridiculous. People think you are ridiculous for expecting granparents to have a shred of respect for your parenting decisions and rules. People are also scared that they might not have rights to their own future grandkids.



Perfectly fit parents with all the emotional investment in the children should have the day. Not the courts.



There are very few exceptions where I think grandparents should have rights (unfit parents being one) and if the grandparents aren't legally unfit it should still be up to the parents unless the child has an established relationship wih them (like the child has seen them every weekend for 5 years and it would traumatized them to lose the relationship.









catrig
by Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 1:11 PM
I disagree with grandparent's rights.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
furbabymum
by Gold Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 1:15 PM

 Well I know there are crazy grandparents. My DH's parents don't see my DS without supervision and there are reasons for that. My sister is just a crazy person who had no problem with us until she got with a crazy man and now uses her kids like pawns. So not all parents are thinking of their kids bests interests and when that can be proven in Court grandparents should be awarded visitation rights.

Quoting parentalrights1:

Whenever family is cut out, the parents are ALWAYS accused and believed to be using them as a pawn.

The offending family members never see any faults with themselves.

There are exceptions sure, but usually the grandparents and family members just couldn't comply with certain boundaries and the parents had enough


Quoting furbabymum:

 There are people out there who use their children like pawns in a chess game. My sister is one of them. I think stable grandparents should fight for the right to see their grandkids for the kids benefit. These kids need to know that they are loved and that someone is there when they need them.


 

carterscutie85
by Bronze Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 1:21 PM
1 mom liked this

My son's grandparents thought they were going to take him alone (they never see him by their choice) and threatened to take me to court if I didn't let them. I reminded them of their rights (which are nonexistant when it comes to my son because they have not done either of the things listed to qualify for grandparents rights) and they shut up lol.

Quoting Stephanie329:

I live in Ohio too, interesting info:)

Q



mamaslove4ever
by New Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 1:29 PM

i had to fight and i only won because my daughters father lives with his mom and he cannot ssee my daughter because he hurt her. i was  lucky


Quoting fireangel5:

I think parents should decide who can be around their children. Why take away a parent's rights? SMH


Quoting mamaslove4ever:

In nebraska grandparents can sue and win the majority of the time. Same with Illinois




trachmom312
by Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 1:52 PM

Not that I know of. 


Quoting parentalrights1:

Well if he did then he could give visitation.

Was there ever bad blood between your family and her?


Quoting trachmom312:

My BIL?? Hell no that would be to much work for him. 


Quoting parehatntalrights1:

Does he have visitation?





Quoting trachmom312:

In cases like my father in law I believe he should file for visitation of his Grandkids. My brother in law and his girlfriend broke up and now his ex won't let anyone in his family see the kids. My fil and my niece and nephew are really close. He is also an amazing Papa. But now cause she is pissed at my bil she is holding the kids hostage. 









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