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Lets talk sex, or lack thereof.

Posted by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 2:03 PM
  • 50 Replies

This is a bit personal and well......so be it. lol

Since my divorce, which began in 10/10, I have had sex once. 

And ya know what.......I don't miss it.  I really don't.  

I am a very emotional person when it comes to some things.  Sex is one of them.  I had my days when I could get it on and not really care the next day but overall, there has to be some connection, some meaning behind it all for me.  

I have friends who are mortified that I am not out there just looking to get laid.  How could I go so long without it?!?

Quite honestly, I have no desire to get laid.  None.  Nada.  Zip.

Am I really that strange?


by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 2:03 PM
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Replies (1-10):
tscritch
by Silver Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 2:05 PM
1 mom liked this

 I don't think you are strange. I think that for a lot of women there needs to be meaning and feelings attached to sex.

punky3175
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 2:07 PM
2 moms liked this
I KNEW there was a reason I liked you so much. ;-)

Mother's Day weekend will be 2 years for me. Everything you said above is me. I'm over sex just for the sake of sex. I'll be eternally grateful I didn't have sex with the last two people that I dated. And I'm in no rush to break my 'dry spell.' I'm kind of curious how long it will last.
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jessilin0113
by Ruby Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 2:08 PM
1 mom liked this
I'm with the OP and punky. Glad to know I'm not alone.
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pamelax3
by Gold Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 2:11 PM

Nope not strange at all

SLTmom
by Silver Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 2:13 PM
2 moms liked this

I don't think its strange.  I think you reach a point in your life, get to a place where you know yourself well enough, where you know sex has to be meaningful to feel good.  A quick one nighter just to scratch an itch isn't appealing.


And don't feel like you're weird or strange. The gift of giving yourself to someone else is worth waiting for someone special.

"I would rather have a mind opened by wonder than one closed by belief"  Gerry Spence

OHgirlinCA
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 2:13 PM
1 mom liked this

 No, I don't think you're strange at all.  There's nothing wrong with waiting until you feel connected to someone. 

I kind of went in the opposite direction as you when my first marriage ended.  In truth, I think I wanted to prove to myself there wasn't anything wrong with me as my ex had lectured me on and drilled into my head since I never enjoyed having sex with him. 

What I learned is that while sex is fun, it's SO much better when you genuinely care for the one you're with.  I've been with my husband for almost 8 years, and I've never been so satisfied :)

FromAtoZ
by AllieCat on Apr. 9, 2013 at 2:20 PM
1 mom liked this

Glad to hear I am not alone!  Whew!

lol

I don't feel strange, I don't feel abnormal.  I don't think it is necessary, sex that is.  Not just for the sake of it.  

If I should never meet some one that I feel comfortable enough with, sex or otherwise, then that is what is meant to happen.  Or not happen. lol

romalove
by Roma on Apr. 9, 2013 at 2:24 PM
1 mom liked this

You are missing the emotional connection to someone that would entice you to want to have sex, I think.

Age plays a part.

Other facts too.

You aren't strange.  I go through periods of time where I don't care, then periods of time where I care a LOT, and I am married.

Just be good to yourself and see wherever you life takes you.  Desire may come back.  :-)

punky3175
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 2:24 PM
I did the same thing. I've been divorced for almost 9 years now though and have 'sown my oats' and am ready for it to actually mean something.

Quoting OHgirlinCA:

 No, I don't think you're strange at all.  There's nothing wrong with waiting until you feel connected to someone. 


I kind of went in the opposite direction as you when my first marriage ended.  In truth, I think I wanted to prove to myself there wasn't anything wrong with me as my ex had lectured me on and drilled into my head since I never enjoyed having sex with him. 


What I learned is that while sex is fun, it's SO much better when you genuinely care for the one you're with.  I've been with my husband for almost 8 years, and I've never been so satisfied :)

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Woodbabe
by Woodie on Apr. 9, 2013 at 2:24 PM
1 mom liked this

I don't think you're strange at all! While I enjoy my sex life its 100% related to having a relationship. I don't see me just going out for the purpose of finding sex.

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