Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Poor Single Mothers: Do these women owe it to society to stop reproducing?

Posted by on Apr. 26, 2013 at 10:38 PM
  • 128 Replies

Poor Single Mothers Having More Babies

So...If you can't afford to have another baby.....

When I say "poor" single mothers, I do not mean, "oh, poor single mother, bless the little soul". I mean, they literally are living at or below the poverty level. Do these women owe society to stop producing? Is there any other way to look at it? Well that is what this article is going to discuss. I believe there are varying degrees of this epidemic and not all stories are the same.

There are millions upon millions of women who abuse their position of a child-bearing age woman, and have as many babies as they can for one reason. More babies = more money for them. And it's true! At this time, that is how Social Services is set up. So it certainly does leave one to wonder, if these women are simply looking for paychecks rather than more little bundle of joys to enhance their families.

I can't help but to think of Octomom (gosh, I'd die if being dubbed with that nickname), who delievered 2 sets of twins, then 8 babies at one time. I guess we will never know her true motivation. And for sure her doctor is culpable in some way. But I for one, do not see that as an example of someone wanting to add "one more" to enhance their family. WHEN THEY ALREADY had 4 at home they were struggling with.

Even in my own town, I see mothers with many young children, yelling at them as they go down the street, and I feel sorry for their kids. Were they brought into the world as another paycheck and tax deduction? Now, the mom has to 'go through the motions' of raising them to get her money?

To read the rest:

http://littlethespians.hubpages.com/hub/Poor-Single-Mothers-Having-More-Babies


edit



Quote:



And FS, you should correct the error in the post. Six kids then eight. Not four. Four singletons, one set of fraternal twins then she had her octuplets.

by on Apr. 26, 2013 at 10:38 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
futureshock
by Ruby Member on Apr. 26, 2013 at 10:40 PM

Here is the rest of the article:

So, I am on the fence, when I know THIS girl, who knows THAT girl, who knows this OTHER girls cousin who is approaching 40 fast and only has one child. This woman (that I know of) daily hears the clock POUNDING that this is her last days in order to expand her family of 1 to 2. That is all she wants is one more baby before it all said and done. She went through her whole child-bearing years delivering one baby. And she now wants another one. What makes this controversial is the fact, that this woman that I know of, is poor. Right now the only assistance she receives is $17.00 in food stamps each month. A whopping $17.00! She has her own place, and is very involved in her community, but she for sure has baby on the brain.

Are you going to bash her? She is not going to go out and just get pregnant by some random guy. She is saving her money for a sperm bank and going that route to get pregnant. However, she does have plans to get help for formula and TANF during the baby's early years. She feels her right to be a mother again, should not be squashed by her current financial situation. And I do know she is a good mother, not a deadbeat. But she is going into it fully knowing she will use the services of social services. She did not use social services on her first child. The economy is mostly to blame. She worked hard for 20 years paying taxes and paying into government programs. She is now on Disability, being treated and doing fine.


Not the goal of THIS single mother

See all 2 photos

Is having babies a privilege of the well off?

Having a family is our right! They don't run our credit report before 'allowing' us to reproduce. And for someone just trying to have 2 children, who knows how to make ends meet, (social services only does so much), and does have a history of working, does this put her in the same boat of someone who is abusing the welfare system?

She is not getting pregnant on the sly, ready to stand behind her choice, but freely admits, she will be applying for benefits. Yes, she CHOSE to have this baby. She is currently saving the $600.00 or so it is going to cost her to have the baby rather than just timing her system and involving some random guy. I know she is going to be judged by many.

So, what is your honest opinion. Do you think she is abusing the system? Does she deserve to be sad the rest of her life because she never married and at the end of her child-bearing years her options left her with this? Would you support her?

MeAndTommyLee
by Gold Member on Apr. 26, 2013 at 10:44 PM
11 moms liked this

I don't think financially struggling/poor single mothers owe society anything.  They owe their children a proper upbringing with adequate food, clothing, housing, educational choices and so much more.  While I wish for the sake of their other children they would stop reproducing, I do not feel as if I have the right to tell them they can't.

Sisteract
by Whoopie on Apr. 26, 2013 at 10:56 PM

This

Quoting MeAndTommyLee:

I don't think financially struggling/poor single mothers owe society anything.  They owe their children a proper upbringing with adequate food, clothing, housing, educational choices and so much more.  While I wish for the sake of their other children they would stop reproducing, I do not feel as if I have the right to tell them they can't.


Suzy_Sunshine
by Silver Member on Apr. 26, 2013 at 10:58 PM

Of course they do. 

Suzy_Sunshine
by Silver Member on Apr. 26, 2013 at 11:02 PM

I can't figure out what you mean by this.

I agree that they owe their children food, clothing, housing, etc...

I also agree that we don't have the right to tell them not to reproduce.

We certainly have the right not to fund their irresponsbility. Are you suggesting that we stop?

Quoting MeAndTommyLee:

I don't think financially struggling/poor single mothers owe society anything.  They owe their children a proper upbringing with adequate food, clothing, housing, educational choices and so much more.  While I wish for the sake of their other children they would stop reproducing, I do not feel as if I have the right to tell them they can't.


Sisteract
by Whoopie on Apr. 26, 2013 at 11:03 PM

Spin, spin, spin.


Quoting Suzy_Sunshine:

I can't figure out what you mean by this.

I agree that they owe their children food, clothing, housing, etc...

I also agree that we don't have the right to tell them not to reproduce.

We certainly have the right not to fund their irresponsbility. Are you suggesting that we stop?

Quoting MeAndTommyLee:

I don't think financially struggling/poor single mothers owe society anything.  They owe their children a proper upbringing with adequate food, clothing, housing, educational choices and so much more.  While I wish for the sake of their other children they would stop reproducing, I do not feel as if I have the right to tell them they can't.



grandmab125
by Gold Member on Apr. 26, 2013 at 11:05 PM
6 moms liked this

 If you are a poor single mother, you have no business having more children that you, in all likelyhood, can't support.

btamilee
by Silver Member on Apr. 26, 2013 at 11:10 PM
7 moms liked this

 I don't know if any of us has the right to tell them they cannot reproduce.  BUT....we do have the right to tell them if they make the decision to reproduce, then THEY should be prepared to financially take responsibility for them!

Quoting MeAndTommyLee:

I don't think financially struggling/poor single mothers owe society anything.  They owe their children a proper upbringing with adequate food, clothing, housing, educational choices and so much more.  While I wish for the sake of their other children they would stop reproducing, I do not feel as if I have the right to tell them they can't.


 

gsprofval
by on Apr. 26, 2013 at 11:10 PM
5 moms liked this

We should not have to pay for all the kids.  Perhaps it should work like this: you start on welfare, food stamps, etc. and if you have any more kids, then we start deducting from how much you can get because you can't afford the kids you already have.

We should not keep entitling these types of women.  Yes, the kids need to be fed, so I guess momma can learn to be responsible.

futureshock
by Ruby Member on Apr. 26, 2013 at 11:12 PM

Mothers of large 'problem families' must stop having children, warns senior government adviser

By John Hutchinson and Rosie Taylor

|

Outspoken: Families tsar Louise Carey has said that the government cannot afford to be too 'soft' on families

Outspoken: Families tsar Louise Carey has said that the government cannot afford to be too 'soft' on families

The government should ‘interfere’ to stop problem families having too many children, the families ‘tsar’ has said.

Louise Casey, whose study of 120,000 antisocial households was released this week, said the government must not be a ‘soft touch’ when it comes to telling women not to have any more children if they are struggling to cope.

Speaking to the Daily Telegraph, she said: ‘There are plenty of people who have large families and function incredibly well, and good luck to them, it must be lovely. The issue for me, out of the families that I have met, (is that) they are not functioning, lovely families.’

She added: ‘Yes, we have to help these families. But I also don’t think we should soft-touch those families. We are not running some cuddly social workers’ programme to wrap everybody in cotton wool.’

She said the state must tell mothers to take ‘responsibility’ and stop getting pregnant by different men.

‘The responsibility is as important as coming off drugs, coming off alcohol, getting a grip and getting the kids to school.’

Miss Casey said the government needed ‘toughness’ to make sure children were getting educated.

 

She said: ‘If every kid in the country who should be in school was there all day, every day, you would transform all sorts of problems.’

It was last summer's London riots that led to Prime Minister David Cameron setting up the family unit to combat these kind of problems within society.

Miss Casey, who was a former aide of Labour PM Tony Blair, was charged with heading up the new initiative, and a threat of taking back council houses, placing children into car and the prospect of prison were put to families.

Be careful: Miss Casey has called for some women to stop getting pregnant by different men

Be careful: Miss Casey has called for some women to stop getting pregnant by different men

An analysis of 16 of the worst families in the country worked out that they cost the state £200,000 each year.

Miss Casey's studies involved her getting right into the family situation; one instance saw her watch on as the courts took a woman's ninth child away from her.

The woman in question was a drug addict, and the chances are without proper help she would go on to become pregnant again.

And on another occasion, Miss Casey intervened when a parent, on hearing their child had been unruly at school, called them a 'nightmare': Miss Casey responded by telling the parent that it was THEM who was the 'nightmare'.

The programme is though to cost £448 million pounds, and as oppose to aim to get children involved in a broad range of inter-mingling, it has focused on one of the basics - getting the child to school.

'I say, the biggest diversionary activity on God’s earth is called school. If every kid in the country who should be in school (was) there, all day, every day, you would transform all sorts of problems.'

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)



Featured