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Current Events & Hot Topics Current Events & Hot Topics

So, I usually laugh and poke the faddish parenting philosophies. I was listening to a local NPR station this morning and there were a few people in the studio just speaking casually about their experiences. One had a little brother that was going on his first professional job interview and they were talking about the three biggest things that cause a 'millenial' *that's the new buzzword for the newest college grads* to flunk a job interview. According to the conversation in the studio it was this:

#3: texting, smart phoning and social mediaing during said job interview (does this really surprise anyone?)

#2: Failure to address superiors as such.

#1: Parents of job applicants... as in parents who attend job interviews and interfere on behalf of precious Johnny or shining star Judy.


I was shocked. Literally shocked. After all my time on CM I really shouldn't be, but... REALLY? Has it really gone that far? Does anyone really think this is acceptable?

As an aside, I have a friend who teaches UPPER level college courses who says she has parents in her office, on her phone and in her email on a weekly basis asking, complaining and cajoling about their college age children... I'm talking grad students here.

Is this really something we as a society are moving toward as not only an accepted but encouraged form of parenting? It sort of feels that way when I read some of the stuff I read here...

Discuss.





by on Apr. 30, 2013 at 11:25 AM
Replies (201-210):
angeltink7
by on May. 2, 2013 at 12:43 AM

 

Some of that sounds obserd. I have also been told something that happens too often in job interviews is people come in wearing pajama bottoms and slipper. The way I look at it is to each their own. That mean more jobs for those who are serious about getting one.

As for the parents being involved at a college level, it is what it is and if mommy and daddy are paying an arm and a leg in money and/or cosigning on big loans and can/do not trust their adult child to take care of things themselves then so be it. Maybe if a parents future and income was not on the line for the high price of education they would back off more? Though I make my son who will be a college freshman next year handle his own stuff at the college I do help him with paperwork and the signing up process at home because he has never done it before. He is also going to community college so the cost is not so high and he is paying himself in full for his classes and books and we will only reimburse for them if he gets an A or B in his classes. That would not work at a private university where he might be going into debt with us as co signers for $40,000 plus per year.

MsBlueBelle
by New Member on May. 2, 2013 at 12:57 AM

 Having interviewed many people in my career, I always felt bad for the children in this situation, more than the applicant.

BuckeyezRule
by Bronze Member on May. 2, 2013 at 1:27 AM

Yikes! I honestly hate that show because of that. I've seen a few scenes channel surfing. I pray I'm never like her (I know she's a fictional character. Lol) with my ds. My besties mil has 2 ds's and is so like that. She called her ds, my besties hubby, EVERYDAY on their honeymoon!!!!!! She told me that. Lol the guy is my hubby's bestie. Lol


Quoting Momniscient:

Doris is the mom the helicopter parents idolize? lol


Quoting romalove:

Anyone remember the Everybody Loves Raymond episode where the mom went to the FBI interviewer when Robert was trying to get a job there?




BuckeyezRule
by Bronze Member on May. 2, 2013 at 1:39 AM

Wow, really? In our school, k kids are required to have someone get them, a parent or sibling. 1st and up, all walk with either siblings, or with the pack (or are picked up, ride the bus) . Lol k kids even walk with siblings. My own 8 and 9yo, walk with all the kids in our neighborhood, they find walking. There's always someone walking. Lol 


Quoting Debmomto2girls:

When my girls were in grades K-3, we had to walk them to the door. We were not allowed to drop off and I was excited for 4th grade... Lol

Quoting Mom2Just1:

I am not surprised.  I see parents walking their children into school instead of dropping them off and a teacher leading them to their classroom.  



Bonneata
by on May. 2, 2013 at 2:40 AM



Quoting JakeandEmmasMom:

Quoting FromAtoZ:

We have a young woman at work whose husband is always the one calling in for her, calling to see what her schedule is, stating it needs to be changed to meet their needs, etc.

I asked her why she does not call herself, that she needs to, and not 1/2 hour prior to her shift.  

Her husband likes to ensure she is taken care of and handles all things that could bring about stress for her, just like her parents used to do.

Huh?

I made it clear that she is to follow policy.  Her husband, or her parents, have nothing to do with it and calls from him will no longer be acceptable.  She can write down her own schedule, copy it, what ever, while at work.  For goodness sakes, grow up.

 I used to work for a bank.  One day, I was discussing the "calling in" policy with my supervisor, and she told me the story about when she had gotten officially reprimanded because her mother called in for her.  This was when Mount Saint Helens blew.  She and her family had been on a road trip when the mountain blew, and they were having trouble getting back home.   They eventually made it to a hotel, but couldn't get out for a couple of days, and the phone connection was spotty at best.  She was finally able to get ahold of her mom to let her know they were okay, but holed up at a motel, and could she please call the bank and let them know what was going on.  She got written up for that.  Yep.  Times sure have changed.

This is actually an acceptable reason for someone else to call in for you. 


bhejlik
by Member on May. 2, 2013 at 5:38 AM

OMG...I'm shocked. REALLY? REALLY on all of it. Good lord. You do realize most of these people will be taking care of your generation one day. OY VEY!

ButterMeUp
by Silver Member on May. 2, 2013 at 6:08 AM
I'm guilty of this. My husband doesn't go to doctor appointments, stressful meetings, ect with me for support, he goes there to talk form me. I'm not assertive at all. The though of getting into a disagreement with someone or talking to someone who might cause me harm or get irate with me petrifies me. I seldomly even take my orders back to have them fixed when I'm alone or the person a the register looks rude or unprofessional.

My Dh was the only real BF I've ever had. He always takes care of anything I wont do because I'm timid or anything that might stress me out. When I got my first job in college, he went with me. He waited in the car but I needed to know he would be right there to console me if I was rejected.

I don't really see the harm in needing a lot of emotional support. I've always been shy and being tormented in school did nothing but make it worse. Now I run from conflict and it's something I've never been able to shake. I don't think it's really fair to judge others based on their emotional states. I wish people were just a little more supportive. I may not be the most emotional sound, but I'm a damn good mom, person, and a caring person above all. I'll admit it's differently not the live I hope my DD has, but I hope if she does she will marry someone like her father and run into supportive emvionments that won't challenge her. Hopefully society will be more understand by the times she's out in the real world.


Quoting FromAtoZ:

We have a young woman at work whose husband is always the one calling in for her, calling to see what her schedule is, stating it needs to be changed to meet their needs, etc.

I asked her why she does not call herself, that she needs to, and not 1/2 hour prior to her shift.  

Her husband likes to ensure she is taken care of and handles all things that could bring about stress for her, just like her parents used to do.

Huh?

I made it clear that she is to follow policy.  Her husband, or her parents, have nothing to do with it and calls from him will no longer be acceptable.  She can write down her own schedule, copy it, what ever, while at work.  For goodness sakes, grow up.

butzi
by Member on May. 2, 2013 at 9:30 AM
My husband is a college professor; you would not believe some of the stories he tells about crazy hovering parents.
FromAtoZ
by AllieCat on May. 2, 2013 at 9:57 AM


Quoting ButterMeUp:

I'm guilty of this. My husband doesn't go to doctor appointments, stressful meetings, ect with me for support, he goes there to talk form me. I'm not assertive at all. The though of getting into a disagreement with someone or talking to someone who might cause me harm or get irate with me petrifies me. I seldomly even take my orders back to have them fixed when I'm alone or the person a the register looks rude or unprofessional.

My Dh was the only real BF I've ever had. He always takes care of anything I wont do because I'm timid or anything that might stress me out. When I got my first job in college, he went with me. He waited in the car but I needed to know he would be right there to console me if I was rejected.

I don't really see the harm in needing a lot of emotional support. I've always been shy and being tormented in school did nothing but make it worse. Now I run from conflict and it's something I've never been able to shake. I don't think it's really fair to judge others based on their emotional states. I wish people were just a little more supportive. I may not be the most emotional sound, but I'm a damn good mom, person, and a caring person above all. I'll admit it's differently not the live I hope my DD has, but I hope if she does she will marry someone like her father and run into supportive emvionments that won't challenge her. Hopefully society will be more understand by the times she's out in the real world.


Quoting FromAtoZ:

We have a young woman at work whose husband is always the one calling in for her, calling to see what her schedule is, stating it needs to be changed to meet their needs, etc.

I asked her why she does not call herself, that she needs to, and not 1/2 hour prior to her shift.  

Her husband likes to ensure she is taken care of and handles all things that could bring about stress for her, just like her parents used to do.

Huh?

I made it clear that she is to follow policy.  Her husband, or her parents, have nothing to do with it and calls from him will no longer be acceptable.  She can write down her own schedule, copy it, what ever, while at work.  For goodness sakes, grow up.

Being supportive is fine.  Doing the job of another when it is their responsibility is another.  There is no reason for any one other than the employee to be calling in, unless it is an instance when she is physically unable.  She can check her schedule while she is at work.

Many employers are not going to find it endearing if a parent, or a spouse, is constantly underfoot.  If there is a medical issue, or mental issue, that prevents the individual from handling their own responsibilities, that needs to be addressed from the beginning.  

If your husband is always doing things for you how will you be able to handle situations without him?  I admire how supportive he is but there comes a time when you need to be able to step up and handle your own affairs yourself.  

I can understand his being in the car during your interview.  As long as he does not go in with you to speak for you.  I can't work with some one who cannot do the job themselves.  Many other people cannot as well.  It hinders the overall work environment.  

jazzgirl205
by Member on May. 2, 2013 at 12:03 PM

Has anyone checked out freerangekids.com?

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