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So, I usually laugh and poke the faddish parenting philosophies. I was listening to a local NPR station this morning and there were a few people in the studio just speaking casually about their experiences. One had a little brother that was going on his first professional job interview and they were talking about the three biggest things that cause a 'millenial' *that's the new buzzword for the newest college grads* to flunk a job interview. According to the conversation in the studio it was this:

#3: texting, smart phoning and social mediaing during said job interview (does this really surprise anyone?)

#2: Failure to address superiors as such.

#1: Parents of job applicants... as in parents who attend job interviews and interfere on behalf of precious Johnny or shining star Judy.


I was shocked. Literally shocked. After all my time on CM I really shouldn't be, but... REALLY? Has it really gone that far? Does anyone really think this is acceptable?

As an aside, I have a friend who teaches UPPER level college courses who says she has parents in her office, on her phone and in her email on a weekly basis asking, complaining and cajoling about their college age children... I'm talking grad students here.

Is this really something we as a society are moving toward as not only an accepted but encouraged form of parenting? It sort of feels that way when I read some of the stuff I read here...

Discuss.





by on Apr. 30, 2013 at 11:25 AM
Replies (51-60):
cjsbmom
by Lois Lane on Apr. 30, 2013 at 2:55 PM

He sounds controlling and abusive. 

Quoting FromAtoZ:

We have a young woman at work whose husband is always the one calling in for her, calling to see what her schedule is, stating it needs to be changed to meet their needs, etc.

I asked her why she does not call herself, that she needs to, and not 1/2 hour prior to her shift.  

Her husband likes to ensure she is taken care of and handles all things that could bring about stress for her, just like her parents used to do.

Huh?

I made it clear that she is to follow policy.  Her husband, or her parents, have nothing to do with it and calls from him will no longer be acceptable.  She can write down her own schedule, copy it, what ever, while at work.  For goodness sakes, grow up.



JasonsMom2007
by on Apr. 30, 2013 at 2:58 PM

Wow I believe parents should be there to support there adult children but not during something like a job interview or college class.  I'm talking giving them advice (as wanted) to help them be prepared for such things.

DanNStevesmom
by New Member on Apr. 30, 2013 at 3:11 PM

Wow! Now i can see helping prepare a child for an inter view. My mother would help me. when i was in jr high we had Home and Careers class. One assignment that we were doing was a pretend business. The teacher gave us all applications to fill out and then held an interview with each student, she made it clear that we should be presentable and respectful.

Once I got into HS my mother stopped making sure homework was done, if I forgot something, too bad, (I had to explain to my teacher). In my mothers eyes I was a young adult and should be able to handle responsibilities myself. It was my job to keep my grades up if I wanted to play sports. She was still a very involved parent though. She barely missed any soccer and volleyball games ( And i have 2 sisters also) She helped out with fundraisers, plays and was the vice pres of the schools booster club. I can only hope that I can be as good of a mother as she was,

EireLass
by Ruby Member on Apr. 30, 2013 at 3:37 PM

What the hell is wrong with people. I never even drove my kids to their jobs as teens.

OHgirlinCA
by Platinum Member on Apr. 30, 2013 at 3:40 PM

 I really wish I could say I'm surprised, but I can't :(

It really amazes me what parents do for their adult children without realizing it is hindering them.

Roo1234
by Member on Apr. 30, 2013 at 3:47 PM

Yes, this really does happen and has been happening for a while now.  

I would be mortified if any of my children got to that age and I didn't feel they could handle it a job interview on their own.

MeAndTommyLee
by Gold Member on Apr. 30, 2013 at 3:47 PM

It amazes me how `connected' people need these days.  What can anyone possibly have to text about 16hrs a day?  I see it in store checkout lanes, cars, banks schools, parks...!  Really?  I'm secure in my connections with people and don't need that incessant interaction, artificial at that.

The level of rudeness has skyrocketed with this, `I'm all important attitude', as well.  What happened to looking people in the eye when speaking, or using politeness when addressing people?  I'm very uncomfortable when young children address me by my first name.  I cringe inside because I never allowed my children to do such a thing.  Even when they were young children themselves with friends, those little people never called me by my first name.  It was always, "Mrs. Anthony's mom."   And another thing that I hate is when I answer our home phone and some starts talking sans the `hello'.  Really?  You just begin a sentence...

Quoting TranquilMind:

 Yes, one of mine is in school, and I can't imagine calling either. 

The only one that really surprised me - but it shouldn't - is that people are texting or using the phone DURING job interviews?  Really?  That is just RUDE.  But then, everyone is so rude with their phones anyway, I suppose it is inevitable.  Moms ignoring their kids, with their faces glued to the screen.  People staring at their phone while driving!(I wish I could arrest everyone who takes out a phone while driving).  People yakking loudly wherever they are. 

Rude.

The unwillingness to address superiors with titles isn't that surprising, because lots of parents don't even teach their kids to call other parents Mr. and Mrs. anymore.  The overly familiar addressing of superiors would be a natural outcome of that. 

Quoting MeAndTommyLee:

What?!  Oh my Lord, this is really sickening.  Two of our kids attend univeristy at the moment and I can not imagine calling, emailing or dropping in on one of their professors for anything EVER.  This type of parenting is forgien to me and I guess I am a parent of these `millanial' children.

And who in the hell does not turn off their cell phone during a job interview?  That is just rude!  It puts off an aura of superiority, sell-importance and all bad qualities.  Does it surprise me?  Yes and no.  And parents attending job interviews?!  For what?  YOU will not be working there.  Cut the cord! 

 

 


 

TugBoatMama
by on Apr. 30, 2013 at 3:49 PM

My mom is one of the worst offenders in helicopter parenting. My little brother is 27 and works for an architecture firm. My mother has actually called his boss on a few occasions to ask that he be excused from something or that he take it easy on her little boy because he is stressed out. I kid you not.

LIMom1105
by Bronze Member on Apr. 30, 2013 at 4:00 PM
Such a disservice to their kids. I work with teen volunteers, and very often parents make the initial contact. I tell them I need to talk to their son or daughter. A few parents have tried to sit in on the interview (very simple really, they are volunteers).

It's a big plus in my book if the teen contacts me themselves.

And texting during an interview?!?
TCgirlatheart
by TC on Apr. 30, 2013 at 4:08 PM

I cannot imagine that, I just have no words.  

~"Free the child's potential, and you will transform both the child and the world."

Dr. Maria Montessori~

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