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Elizabeth Smart speaks about Abstienence Only Education

Posted by on May. 7, 2013 at 10:42 AM
  • 45 Replies

Elizabeth Smart speaks about abstinence education

By ALEX DOMINGUEZ 

The Associated Press

 

First Published May 06 2013 04:06 pm • Updated 27 minutes ago

BALTIMORE - Rescued kidnapping victim Elizabeth Smart said Wednesday she understands why some human trafficking victims don't run.

Smart said she "felt so dirty and so filthy" after she was raped by her captor, and she understands why someone wouldn't run "because of that alone."

Photos

  • (Trent Nelson  |  The Salt Lake Tribune)   Elizabeth Smart spoke in an interview with The Salt Lake Tribune)   in Salt Lake City on Wednesday, May 18, 2011.

 

 

Smart spoke at a Johns Hopkins human trafficking forum, saying she was raised in a religious household and recalled a school teacher who spoke once about abstinence and compared sex to chewing gum.

"I thought, ‘Oh, my gosh, I'm that chewed up piece of gum, nobody re-chews a piece of gum, you throw it away.' And that's how easy it is to feel like you no longer have worth, you no longer have value," Smart said. "Why would it even be worth screaming out? Why would it even make a difference if you are rescued? Your life still has no value."

The Salt Lake City woman was kidnapped at age 14 from her bedroom. She was freed nine months later when she was found walking with her captor on a suburban street in March 2003. The Associated Press doesn't usually publish the names of accusers or victims in sexual-assault cases unless they agree to be named or identify themselves publicly, as Smart has done.

Since her rescue, Smart has started the Elizabeth Smart Foundation, which works to protect and educate children about violent and sexual crimes.

Smart says children should be educated that "you will always have value and nothing can change that."

Link: http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/news/56248622-78/abstinence-smart-elizabeth-trafficking.html.csp 

Edited for weird font issue!

 

by on May. 7, 2013 at 10:42 AM
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Replies (1-10):
GLWerth
by Gina on May. 7, 2013 at 11:17 AM

BUMP!

Raintree
by Ruby Member on May. 7, 2013 at 11:26 AM
1 mom liked this

I think what she's saying is right. on. 

There is so much damage that can be done when we teach children that they lose value for.. sex of all things.

We need more common sense when it comes to our discussions about sexual activity.

Liz132
by Member on May. 7, 2013 at 11:26 AM
1 mom liked this

 I see where she is coming from with that. My parents were the same way with the abstinence only thing. Basically saying that if you have sex you are discusting trash and no descent man would ever want to be with you again.

DestinyHLewis
by Destiny on May. 7, 2013 at 11:31 AM
2 moms liked this

My sister and I were brought up with the belief that we needed to wait for marriage. However, shaming us wasn't a part of that lesson. You can teach abstinence, without teaching shame. 

GLWerth
by Gina on May. 7, 2013 at 11:31 AM

I do too and thought her perspective is particularly compelling, due to her experiences both before and after her kidnapping.

I've never been a proponent of AO education, but this goes in a direction I never really thought about.

Quoting Raintree:

I think what she's saying is right. on. 

There is so much damage that can be done when we teach children that they lose value for.. sex of all things.

We need more common sense when it comes to our discussions about sexual activity.


 

JakeandEmmasMom
by Platinum Member on May. 7, 2013 at 11:34 AM
1 mom liked this

 I have a tremendous amount of respect for her.  I had never considered AO education having this effect, but I can totally see how it would.  I've never been a proponent of AO education. 

blurp
by Member on May. 7, 2013 at 11:41 AM

I used to yell at people trying to say ''this or that is good for you'', or it may get you in a worse place.   They were of course right, but without the RIGHT to say your peace, with an abuser it's null.   And without the RIGHT to choose which job you get, how to get there, if they'll hire you, if you are worth it, ( worth that job, or line of work ) IF IF IF,  women who are younger know how they'll be treated by society within their minds, before they get into a job, as for the abuser... they know they need to stay away from the woman, at any cost.  IF the female was looking for a job and that abuser was only using her for her womanly qualities that rated him higher than her, that is abuse.   It's not rate or score, or higher value , even that is a contest.  When God himself wants a couple to have happiness, his scorecard is "00"  for both.  They are accountable to him only.   If a couple has no value without God, and does for God only... not each other's merit, it's likely to be better ... think of it this way... when a man loves a woman, he gives his very last dime, and he's the last one to know she said she's over him.   WRONG>  If a man loves himself first, he loves his female counterpart.  woman, girlfriend, wife.   ONLY after a man loves himself as his treatment of his own body to how he is to treat her in kindness, does he know what God's love really means.   So if an abuser sets out for himself, to benefit himself in love, not hatred for himself, he can give that also as he doesn't hate his own body,  

If this makes sense say so, if not, than the bible is lying.

GLWerth
by Gina on May. 7, 2013 at 11:46 AM

Sorry, but I have NO idea what point you are getting at. 

A little clarification would be helpful.

Quoting blurp:

I used to yell at people trying to say ''this or that is good for you'', or it may get you in a worse place.   They were of course right, but without the RIGHT to say your peace, with an abuser it's null.   And without the RIGHT to choose which job you get, how to get there, if they'll hire you, if you are worth it, ( worth that job, or line of work ) IF IF IF,  women who are younger know how they'll be treated by society within their minds, before they get into a job, as for the abuser... they know they need to stay away from the woman, at any cost.  IF the female was looking for a job and that abuser was only using her for her womanly qualities that rated him higher than her, that is abuse.   It's not rate or score, or higher value , even that is a contest.  When God himself wants a couple to have happiness, his scorecard is "00"  for both.  They are accountable to him only.   If a couple has no value without God, and does for God only... not each other's merit, it's likely to be better ... think of it this way... when a man loves a woman, he gives his very last dime, and he's the last one to know she said she's over him.   WRONG>  If a man loves himself first, he loves his female counterpart.  woman, girlfriend, wife.   ONLY after a man loves himself as his treatment of his own body to how he is to treat her in kindness, does he know what God's love really means.   So if an abuser sets out for himself, to benefit himself in love, not hatred for himself, he can give that also as he doesn't hate his own body,  

If this makes sense say so, if not, than the bible is lying.


 

Raintree
by Ruby Member on May. 7, 2013 at 11:47 AM
1 mom liked this


Quoting DestinyHLewis:

My sister and I were brought up with the belief that we needed to wait for marriage. However, shaming us wasn't a part of that lesson. You can teach abstinence, without teaching shame. 

I think the shaming comes along when you explain the 'why' of waiting for marriage.

It's difficult to not go there. I was raised in a fundmentalist church where AO was taught, primarily in school and emphasized from the pulpit- regularly. 

I also think that the message is more often applied to girls than to boys.

LucyMom08
by Gold Member on May. 7, 2013 at 11:47 AM

 Now that's sad :(

And I fully agree with what she is saying...when you tell children that they are worthless if they have sex, basically, as she was taught, then they are going to feel even more helpless if some monster takes that from them...

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