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Is Bisexuality a choice?

Posted by on Jun. 14, 2013 at 5:56 PM
  • 230 Replies

Do you feel that being bisexual is a choice or not? Can you ever control who are what you are attracted toward? Or is it simply a lesser form of hedonism? If so, is hedonism a choice or simple a state of being that is inherent? 


by on Jun. 14, 2013 at 5:56 PM
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Replies (1-10):
TranquilMind
by Platinum Member on Jun. 14, 2013 at 5:59 PM
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 Hedonism.  Good word, and yes, that is a choice.

Donna6503
by Gold Member on Jun. 14, 2013 at 6:03 PM
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Bump (no pun intended)
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stormcris
by Christy on Jun. 14, 2013 at 6:06 PM
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It is a bit of a quandary for me. I think we can choose to have sex with whomever but we cannot choose attraction. We can deny an attraction but do we deny ourselves when we do? I can see this going both ways depending on the person. I can also see it could have many many levels. For instance one person could truly enjoy sex with both sets of people but only be attracted to one side and that may make it a choice. But would that then state that they were either truly heterosexual or truly gay rather than actually bisexual?

(I let my mind wander on this subject for a while but I am not reaching a clear conclusion)


Quoting TranquilMind:

 Hedonism.  Good word, and yes, that is a choice.


Pema_Jampa
by SxyTaco on Jun. 14, 2013 at 6:09 PM
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Not a choice. I do enjoy both sexes. I could choose not to act on those feelings but why deny who I am?

RandRMomma
by Maya on Jun. 14, 2013 at 6:13 PM
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I'm bisexual, and I can't say that my sexuality is a choice. For as long as I can remember, I have been attracted to women. When I was a child, I thought of women a lot differently than my female friends did, and I thought something was wrong with me until I got older. For as long as I can remember, I've been attracted to men too.

However, I think that I may be more attracted to men than to women because I did choose to be with a man and make a family with him. But, if he and I were to break up, I know that I'd end up in a relationship with another woman.

Being bisexual isn't a choice, IMO. I do think that some can be bisexual and more attracted to one gender over the other. Some, like myself, are equal opprotunists. Many bisexual people choose who they're going to be wih. That doesn't make them less bisexual than the next bisexual.

I hope that made sense. lol

stormcris
by Christy on Jun. 14, 2013 at 6:17 PM
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It does make sense, thank you.

Quoting RandRMomma:

I'm bisexual, and I can't say that my sexuality is a choice. For as long as I can remember, I have been attracted to women. When I was a child, I thought of women a lot differently than my female friends did, and I thought something was wrong with me until I got older. For as long as I can remember, I've been attracted to men too.

However, I think that I may be more attracted to men than to women because I did choose to be with a man and make a family with him. But, if he and I were to break up, I know that I'd end up in a relationship with another woman.

Being bisexual isn't a choice, IMO. I do think that some can be bisexual and more attracted to one gender over the other. Some, like myself, are equal opprotunists. Many bisexual people choose who they're going to be wih. That doesn't make them less bisexual than the next bisexual.

I hope that made sense. lol


TruthSeeker.
by Milami on Jun. 14, 2013 at 6:20 PM
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 No more than a heterosexual or homosexual chooses. You just are.

TugBoatMama
by on Jun. 14, 2013 at 6:23 PM
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I have at times questioned how straight I am. I consider myself to be straight, and I have only dated and had sex with men. But I do wonder if I could be considered a bi-sexual, because the idea of loving and being with a woman in a relationship doesn't sound gross or alien to me. It never felt "out of place" in my mind. But I have never acted on any feelings I've ever had for a woman. I've just been friends with them.

i.m.r.
by Bronze Member on Jun. 14, 2013 at 6:24 PM
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I'm pansexual, it wasn't a choice. It is a choice to be in a loving committed relationship, but it doesn't mean I'm not attracted to other people regardless of their sex. It just means I'm in a committed relationship with my df and would never act on those attractions. Just like any other relationship.
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FromAtoZ
by AllieCat on Jun. 14, 2013 at 6:26 PM
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I am not bi-sexual so I can't speak with any experience.

I do, however, believe people are attracted to whomever they are attracted to.  It is who they are, it is what it is.  We are born who we are.

No different than the 'type' of man, or woman, we find attractive.

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