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Current Events & Hot Topics Current Events & Hot Topics

surrogate left high and dry with twins disposable babies

Posted by on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:05 AM
  • 90 Replies
3 moms liked this

When did babies become disposable? What has society become? This woman was hired by a couple to carry their first child and then to carry their triplets. Part way through they make her reduce to two. And then get divorced before delivery and want to cancel the order on the twins. She ends up delivering and raising them, how did we get here people? Its not a reduction its a child! They walked away like changing their mind at walmart. These are human lives!

 

link below

 

by on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:05 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Woodbabe
by Woodie on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:17 AM
4 moms liked this

I hate stories like this....there are far more successful surrogate stories than ones like these! These people suck.

Mommabearbergh
by Gold Member on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:21 AM
Wow
stormcris
by Christy on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:25 AM

How did we get here? Life is full of complications and this way of valuing life is not new.

Clairwil
by Ruby Member on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:30 AM
2 moms liked this
Quoting momaof8:

When did babies become disposable? What has society become? This woman was hired by a couple to carry their first child and then to carry their triplets. Part way through they make her reduce to two. And then get divorced before delivery and want to cancel the order on the twins. She ends up delivering and raising them, how did we get here people? Its not a reduction its a child! They walked away like changing their mind at walmart. These are human lives!

I prefer the surrogacy system in the UK, where it is friendship first, rather than a commercial transaction.

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If you’ve read the book ‘Predicatably Irrational’ by Dan Ariely (if you haven’t I strongly recommend it) (1), you’ll remember a chapter where he discusses monetization of social relationships. Besides mentioning incredibly awkward examples, like offering your mother-in-law cash for cooking a Thanksgiving dinner, he describes a study involving Israeli daycare centres that were frustrated by parents who were constantly late to pick up their children (2). Obviously this was a great inconvenience to the staff, as it made them late for their own obligations, so to combat the time-challenged parents, they instituted a fee for any late pickup to motivate the time-challenged parents to be on time. Unfortunately for the daycare workers, the fee which was intended to motivate the chronically late parents to be on time did the exact opposite, and even more parents were late to pick up their children.

Social vs Market norms

While the original paper sums up the effect well, Ariely does so in simple terms. By introducing money into the equation, which the daycare workers thought would improve behaviour, actually reduced the social obligation (feeling guilty about being late) and replaced it with market norms, allowing the parents to essentially buy a clean conscience. And unfortunately once the social norm (sense of obligation) is replaced with the market norm (late fee), it is often difficult to go back, as once the fee was removed the parents were still more likely to be late to pick up their children.

  1. Ariely, Dan. Predictably Irrational: The hidden forces that shape our decisions. New York, NY: Harper Collins, 2009.
  2. Gneezy and Rustichini (2000). A fine is a price. The Journal of Legal Studies, 29(1): 1-17.


Kate_Momof3
by Silver Member on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:34 AM

 I read the article. The parents pulled out at 14 weeks. Plenty of time to come up with a plan or abort. And, frankly, as a "gestational carrier", she should have been aware of the possibility of this happening. She's done this EIGHT times for strangers...she can't be that naive.

How did we get to this? Because some people would rather have biological children than adopt and modern science and a willing surrogate  have obliged them.

I didn't see anything about "reduction" in the article. I didn't watch the video, but nothing in the article mentioned triplets.

Lunarprancer
by Silver Member on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:37 AM

Clicky?

Kate_Momof3
by Silver Member on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:39 AM
Kate_Momof3
by Silver Member on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:41 AM

 This is the title of the article:

Surrogate Mother Left To Care For Biological Parents' Twins

I'm not sure why the OP opted for such an awkwardly word title for this post.

 

quickbooksworm
by Silver Member on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:45 AM
Were there no provisions in the contract for this situation?
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