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5 THINGS EVERYONE SHOULD KNOW ABOUT SLUT SHAME THIS HALLOWEEN

Posted by on Oct. 30, 2013 at 8:44 PM
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**5 THINGS EVERYONE SHOULD KNOW ABOUT SLUT SHAME THIS HALLOWEEN**
1. Calling women sluts/whores/skanks is a form of sexism.
When it comes to costumes, clothing, and sexual behavior, women are judged by a very different rubric than men. When a guy has a lot of sex, he’s a stud. If a woman behaves the same way, she’s a “whore”, “dirty”, “used up”, and doesn’t deserve to be treated with respect. While people may use terms like “manslut” or “manwhore”, the consequences for the “manwhore” are not nearly as extreme. People don’t see him as unworthy of respect. He won’t be degraded, bullied, or have lies and rumors spread about him. His reputation won’t be destroyed. Being a “manwhore” is dismissed as him *~just being a guy~*.

Because slut shame is a result of sexist ideas about what a woman “should” be or is allowed to do/be in the first place, women slut-shaming each other is a form of internalized sexism. This is where a woman believes sexist things about herself and other women. It can be very disruptive and harmful to women’s relationships with each other.

These are some of the ways slut shame is entrenched in sexism.

2. Slut shame limits women’s freedom.
Calling women names and degrading them when they *break the rules* about how a woman is SUPPOSED to dress or behave ensures that women don’t have the same freedom men do. They are not allowed to dress or do what they like…unless they want to pay the price of being bullied or dehumanized for it.

3. Slut shame is one of the ways women compete with each other for male approval. 
Slut-shaming creates a divide between women. There are the “slutty stupid ones” with “no self respect” and there are the “proper ladies” who deserve to be treated as human. Instead of building women up and cultivating healthy friendships, slut shame turns women against each other so that the slut-shamer can prove she’s “not like that” and therefore worthy of respect. It puts women into harmful categories based on nothing more than how someone dresses or is perceived by others.


4. Slut shame is a form of bullying.
Girls who break outside the mold of what they are supposed to do/be sexually and are thusly labeled sluts are at a higher risk of anxiety, depression, and suicide. There have been many suicides that started with bullying in the form of slut shame. RIP Felicia Garcia, Amanda Todd, Phoebe Prince, Hope Witsell, Stacey Rambold’s unnamed victim, and all the other young women who have tragically taken their own lives because of the heartlessness and sexism of their peers.


5. Slut shame leads to rape, sexual assault, and sexual violence.
Because people see “sluts” as unworthy of respect, she is therefore not entitled to say no. In this mentality, “sluts” become a target of harassment, assault, and even rape. After the violence, she is then blamed for it. After all, she was just a dumb slut….she asked for it, right?

This Halloween (and always) be a good person. Respect women, respect their choices, and check yourself when you find yourself thinking or saying someone is a slut. It’s a deeply held attitude about women that we all learn from our sexist culture, and it is vital that we all take the time to unlearn it. These attitudes are more vicious and dangerous than they might appear.

by on Oct. 30, 2013 at 8:44 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Stephanie329
by Platinum Member on Oct. 30, 2013 at 8:46 PM
Source:
**lacigreen tumblr blog
CorbinsMumma
by Member on Oct. 30, 2013 at 8:49 PM
3 moms liked this

I don't believe in bullying. It is wrong/mean.... but women purposely dress up as sluts/slutty. Its even on some of the costume names. Slutty Cat, Slutty Nurse, Slutty Maid... What do you really expect people to comment on when dressed as something purposely slutty?

leksismommy
by Member on Oct. 30, 2013 at 8:49 PM
2 moms liked this

clapping

Themis_Defleo
by Bronze Member on Oct. 30, 2013 at 8:59 PM
4 moms liked this

I agree with everything you posted, but at the same time, when I see women in my friends' circle on Facebook who are young professionals dressed like they dress for Halloween parties these days, I just have to ask, "why?"

One young woman who is an attorney with a very prominent international firm had a skirt that hardly covered her butt, white shirt tied under her boobs with her boobs hanging out, a weird blonde wig and a fake snake.  She said it was her Brittany look.  If her clients had seen her, how much respect would she command in the next negotiation?  

She's not a whore, a slut, or anything of the sort... I just don't understand why she'd risk losing ANY of the respect that she's worked so hard to earn?

Stephanie329
by Platinum Member on Oct. 30, 2013 at 9:01 PM
1 mom liked this
If someone is dressed up as Michael Myers, you don't label that person as "Michael Myers". Right? You know it's a costume.

Your comment almost sounds like you (general you) have no control over your own behavior once a woman puts on a "slutty" costume.

I get it. When I went out on Halloween years ago, I'd roll my eyes at the girls dressed like that. Part of me wish I'd had the guts to dress like that, the other part was judgmental - then, I grew up. Sharing blogs like this to help stop slut shaming is a good thing. You do have control over your comments.


Quoting CorbinsMumma:

I don't believe in bullying. It is wrong/mean.... but women purposely dress up as sluts/slutty. Its even on some of the costume names. Slutty Cat, Slutty Nurse, Slutty Maid... What do you really expect people to comment on when dressed as something purposely slutty?

CorbinsMumma
by Member on Oct. 30, 2013 at 9:03 PM
2 moms liked this

 I guess I did sound that way and I apologize.


Quoting Stephanie329:

If someone is dressed up as Michael Myers, you don't label that person as "Michael Myers". Right? You know it's a costume.

Your comment almost sounds like you (general you) have no control over your own behavior once a woman puts on a "slutty" costume.

I get it. When I went out on Halloween years ago, I'd roll my eyes at the girls dressed like that. Part of me wish I'd had the guts to dress like that, the other part was judgmental - then, I grew up. Sharing blogs like this to help stop slut shaming is a good thing. You do have control over your comments.


Quoting CorbinsMumma:

I don't believe in bullying. It is wrong/mean.... but women purposely dress up as sluts/slutty. Its even on some of the costume names. Slutty Cat, Slutty Nurse, Slutty Maid... What do you really expect people to comment on when dressed as something purposely slutty?


 

parentalrights1
by on Oct. 30, 2013 at 9:11 PM
Yeah but you're gonna get " the opposite of shaming is condoning" and "we'll they do it to themselves" instead of getti the point that these attitudes shouldn't exist to begin with
snookyfritz
by Platinum Member on Oct. 30, 2013 at 9:17 PM
5 moms liked this

I call crap on that.

At some point someone has to take responsibility for their sluttiness.  There is a very large and wide line between rape and calling something what it is. 

Stephanie329
by Platinum Member on Oct. 30, 2013 at 9:19 PM
1 mom liked this
I wish I could remember where I read this: Halloween dress up is the one night a otherwise conservative (in her dress) woman can let go and "let her hair down" - so to speak. I'm sure there's a whole psychology study behind this:)

I hope for a time when women don't have to worry about losing respect over a Halloween costume. We're not there yet.


Quoting Themis_Defleo:

I agree with everything you posted, but at the same time, when I see women in my friends' circle on Facebook who are young professionals dressed like they dress for Halloween parties these days, I just have to ask, "why?"

One young woman who is an attorney with a very prominent international firm had a skirt that hardly covered her butt, white shirt tied under her boobs with her boobs hanging out, a weird blonde wig and a fake snake.  She said it was her Brittany look.  If her clients had seen her, how much respect would she command in the next negotiation?  

She's not a whore, a slut, or anything of the sort... I just don't understand why she'd risk losing ANY of the respect that she's worked so hard to earn?

snookyfritz
by Platinum Member on Oct. 30, 2013 at 9:22 PM

Societal mores and morals shouldn't exist?


Quoting parentalrights1:

Yeah but you're gonna get " the opposite of shaming is condoning" and "we'll they do it to themselves" instead of getti the point that these attitudes shouldn't exist to begin with



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