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Middle child syndrome?

Posted by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 12:04 PM
  • 43 Replies
Anyone here a middle child, or have a middle child, and have any thoughts or input? I had a dream last night that my poor middle started kindergarten and I missed his first day, and he had to find his classroom and everything alone... Silly, but symbolic.

Is it a real thing, or imagined by the middle child? A little of both? Any way to counter act it? I feel like I'm constantly giving my middle extra attention, possibly due to guilt because I want to make sure he doesn't feel left out... Am I causing a bigger problem?

Haha, sorry I'm just rambling now... Figured it would make a good discussion with you intelligent ladies!
by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 12:04 PM
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Replies (1-10):
EireLass
by Ruby Member on Dec. 30, 2013 at 3:36 PM
The forgotten or overlooked child.
Sisteract
by Whoopie on Dec. 30, 2013 at 3:40 PM

I do not have a middle child, but have known many. I think middles fair better if they are also "onlys"- only son or daughter, if not it's worse. 

My brother was the stereotypical middle child- 

supercarp
by Silver Member on Dec. 30, 2013 at 3:44 PM

There may be other family dynamics that affect the "middle " thing. If he is the only boy, he may automatically get more attention. My middle child got short shrift because my youngest had several hospitalizations and I stayed in the hospital with her each time. I know she felt that I favored her, but it was unavoidable.

FromAtoZ
by AllieCat on Dec. 30, 2013 at 3:47 PM
1 mom liked this

I was a middle child, or sorts.

I have a middle daughter.

I never had any issues.  My daughter never had any either. 

I've never really known a middle child who had any issues, younger or otherwise.

I am of no help.

babie113
by Silver Member on Dec. 30, 2013 at 3:54 PM
this is me .im the middle child out of 3 but im the only girl I feel I was treated ok .but my older bro was the "golden child" thats even what my parents called him .he was the obvious favorite. my younger bro was the fogotten child .I was not really treated special for being the only girl but my dad was not as hard on me

Quoting Sisteract:

I do not have a middle child, but have known many. I think middles fair better if they are also "onlys"- only son or daughter, if not it's worse. 

My brother was the stereotypical middle child- 

LindaClement
by Thatwoman on Dec. 30, 2013 at 3:55 PM

I don't know if it's real or imagined.

I'm a middle --what am I supposed to be?

matofour
by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 4:01 PM
I have a daughter who we say is classic middle child syndrome.
Funny thing is, she's not the middle child.
She was just born with that type of personality.
The why me, always a victim, needs lots of attention type of kid. Just the personality she was born with.
Drives me insane.
VooDooB
by The Corrupter on Dec. 30, 2013 at 4:01 PM

I's just like the "only child syndrome". It's all in the parenting. If a parent overlooks the middle child, it's a parenting failure. Not the child's fault. If you spoil your only child and never teach them to share, it's a parenting fail.

 

rfurlongg
by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 4:02 PM
1 mom liked this
I am a middle child and I have a middle child. Growing up I never felt forgotten or neglected. Although I know my parents often worried about me. I did feel that I was not often heard. My siblings were/are very loud and I was/am more soft spoken. I learned to use that to my advantage. I am a great listener :-) and I have made a career of it.

I worry about my middle child, I think that is part of being a mom though. If I stop and think about it, I worry about something different with each kid. I love them fiercely and let them know daily and we plan "special days" for each child. I have faith we are doing the best we can and I think everything will work out in the end. I turned out ok :-).
terpmama
by Silver Member on Dec. 30, 2013 at 4:07 PM

In my experience middle girls of all girls trios seem to fair the worst (in negative attention seeking behaviors) and middle boys of all boy trios do best with independence.

i will be adding a third boy here soon (35 weeks)... We generally try to take time with each child individually so I doubt we'll have to change much.

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