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NEED SERIOUS HELP on Long Distance Agreement!!!

Posted by on Feb. 24, 2014 at 10:25 PM
  • 5 Replies

Okay...My son is now 12 months old....BD (baby daddy) has not really been a part of my sons life. He doubted he was his son and all this other bs while i was pregnant and I still let that roll off my back (I still have all of the texts to prove he said it)....DNA was proven that it was his son and then he finally came to ohio to visit his son with his mom (so she could pay for the visit expenses) when our son was almost 8 months old....I turned around and not even a month later went down to Virginia Beach to visit some friends (where i used to be stationed at in the military) and Blake got to see his dad for almost two weeks due to me...things were great when we were on vacation, we were civil and i thought that was how things would continue but boy was I wrong!! He got out of the military a month later and moved to Jacksonville, FL to be with his gf (the one he dated before me as well) and this girl is a total nut job!! So, he stopped paying child support (he was already behind almost 2,000 at that point) and he never contacted me for our son during the holidays or anything...then our sons bday comes around i contacted him and let him skype for 20 minutes and my son cried the entire time! My son sees my boyfriend as dad than his own biological father. my boyfriend is amazing with him and loves him unconditonally and is there for him everyday and has been almost all of his life.

Well, now that my ex has this new girl, he wants to see his son for a month at a time all the way in florida. well, i dont know his address, who he works for, who would be caring for our son while he works, where my son would go to doctor at (he has some health issues that he sees three specialists for already), if he has anything for my son as far as toys, bed, etc...and i ask for the info and pics of stuff and he gets hostile with me and says "I will just take you to court and get sole custody".....well, i know that its not right to keep my son from his biological father and just let him figure out the truth on his own of what his biological father does but i know that he would be in bad hands if he went to go see him. i am not comfortable with 4 weeks and i told him that but he wont listen...i dont know what else to do at this point....

Oh and, my sons biologicial father says "u never changed our sons last name to my last name from your maiden name like u said u would so therefore i know u cant keep to an agreement"...Well, he never keeps to his word ever unlike me, i do what i say (except change his last name...for what? for him to have "pride""

if you have any advice at all, i would greatly appreciate it! I definitely need to figure out a fair agreement and try to propose that to him....Thanks Ladies!

by on Feb. 24, 2014 at 10:25 PM
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Replies (1-5):
by AllieCat on Feb. 24, 2014 at 10:29 PM

Best advice, get yourself a lawyer.

by Platinum Member on Feb. 24, 2014 at 10:46 PM
Agreed. No way would I send my son to a virtual stranger for 4 weeks...even if all the info you requested had been politely provided. And without a legal, biding custody agreement? Uh uh.

Quoting FromAtoZ:

Best advice, get yourself a lawyer.

by Member on Feb. 24, 2014 at 10:50 PM

Wait it out and let him take you to court.  He won't because he's so far behind on child support.

by Gold Member on Feb. 24, 2014 at 11:04 PM

YOU propose nothing. Let your lawyer do it. Quite frankly, I think it would be far more harmful for this child to see the sperm donor again. 

by GIF Giver on Feb. 24, 2014 at 11:08 PM

Do nothing. Cut contact. Wait and see.

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