• In the Spotlight:
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

Posted by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:03 AM
  • 39 Replies
19 moms liked this

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

SARAH PALIN: The chicken crossed the road because, gosh-darn it, he's a maverick!

BARACK OBAMA: Let me be perfectly clear, if the chickens like their eggs they can keep their eggs. No chicken will be required to cross the road to surrender her eggs. Period.

JOHN McCAIN: My friends, the chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: What difference at this point does it make why the chicken crossed the road.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or against us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken.

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white?

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he is acting by not taking on his current problems before adding any new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross the road so badly. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a NEW CAR so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way the chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish it's lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2014, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2014. This new platform is much more stable and will never reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:03 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
sweet-a-kins
by Emerald Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:03 AM
1 mom liked this
Just a little fluff
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
GLWerth
by Gina on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:15 AM
6 moms liked this

My favorite one: ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

taniamorse85
by Bronze Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:35 AM
1 mom liked this

After all the shit my computer is putting me through, I needed a good chuckle.  TFS

jllcali
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:59 AM
1 mom liked this
I can't decide if I like bill clinton's or colonel sanders' answer better
JakeandEmmasMom
by Platinum Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 1:49 AM
1 mom liked this
Hilarious!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
mom_of_jax14
by Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 3:01 AM
Love it. Thanks
Mommy2Boys0900
by Mrs. Wahlberg on Jun. 29, 2014 at 5:47 AM
1 mom liked this
Love this! Thanks for sharing.
momtoscott
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:01 AM
1 mom liked this
Lol.
littlemum41
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:05 AM
1 mom liked this
Love this.!
:-)
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
sllytnkrbl
by Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:59 AM
1 mom liked this
Thank you for sharing, this is great!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)