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Do you like catcalls or do you feel they are degrading to women?

Posted by on Aug. 20, 2014 at 9:38 AM
  • 34 Replies
1 mom liked this

Catcalls Are Never Flattering -- Despite What One Woman Thinks

by Lisa Fogarty

A writer from the New York Post recently confessed that she loves summertime because it allows her to wear fewer articles of clothing, enjoy the hot sun -- and be victimized by a bunch of guys on the street who think nothing of catcalling, whistling, and calling her "sweet boobs."

Okay, I made that last part up. But yes, the attractive writer did admit she enjoys "wolf whistles" because they send her "ego soaring." And maybe I need to be easy on her -- perhaps she's fearlessly stating something that is a fact for many straight women: we enjoy the attention of men. To her credit, she separates the "good" catcalls from the "bad:" it's one thing for a man to call a woman "beautiful," and quite another to call her out for having a "big rack."

Only she's missing the point here. Catcalls aren't about US. They are only for the benefit of the men who shamelessly resort to using them.

The writer of this essay says she discovered the magic of catcalls when she was a mere 20-year-old flower who worked as an intern for MTV. She appreciated the way these men -- she speaks a great deal about construction workers, by the way -- spoke their minds and didn't play games the way college guys did.

I feel sad for this woman -- not because she doesn't deserve all of the attention she can get -- she's absolutely gorgeous -- but because she has allowed the comments of strangers to have such a great impact on her self-worth. When men pass comments about our beauty on the street, we are a thought to them for, maybe, a millisecond before they move on to the next female in a skirt.

 More from The Stir: Men No Longer Think I Am Attractive (& That's Okay)

Their goal isn't to flatter -- it's to reassure themselves that they are more powerful than we are -- I guess it really isn't enough to know they make more money than we do?

If you think about it, the sexiest men in the world aren't the ones you can picture hanging out on a street corner, throwing around and wasting perfectly good compliments on perfect strangers -- women they may not even have the desire to date or get to know. You think Jon Hamm has ever demanded that a woman "smile" for him? 

Confident, sexy men who know they have a lot to offer women don't feel the need to make them feel uncomfortable on the street. And any woman who appreciates what amounts to a man tearing open a festering wound of insecurity and allowing it to ooze across the stilettos that inspired so many tasteless comments is selling herself short.

Do you like catcalls or do you feel they are degrading to women?

 

Image via Michael/Flickr

by on Aug. 20, 2014 at 9:38 AM
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Replies (1-10):
snookyfritz
by Platinum Member on Aug. 20, 2014 at 9:44 AM
2 moms liked this

I don't get catcalls anymore. :(  It is an ego boost and when I was young and working in the city, I found them flattering and a boost to the old ego.  I never felt degraded or dirty.  I don't recall anyone every getting filthy or insutling.  There are so many more reasons to get all puffed up about. 

1stmuslimah
by Silver Member on Aug. 20, 2014 at 9:54 AM

Maybe she enjoys it, maybe that is what she needs to assure her self. I am disgusted when it is done to me. It is trashy, shows lack of respect and any man who is a gentleman would not do that to a women.

Gamer_mom1
by Bronze Member on Aug. 20, 2014 at 10:00 AM
2 moms liked this
There was a time when I bought into the idea that my value was in my sex appeal and I enjoyed it at the time because I also had low self esteem

Now I see it for what it is since I've grown up some

Innocently telling someone you find them beautiful is flattering. A boy did that once in early high school when I was still being bullied. He just passively said to someone "yeah I think she's very pretty" and was sincere and expected nothing out of it. That was nice and stuck with me

The idiots shouting and whistling at your "nice tits" as you're walking down the street aren't doing it to flatter you or show kindness. They feel entitled to comment on your body in any vulgar way they wish because they see you as beneath them. A piece of meat for their enjoyment. They don't care if your offended or not. You're "supposed" to like it or just let them do it. Cuz obviously everyone wants them fucking them with their eyes
marmie41
by Member on Aug. 20, 2014 at 10:04 AM
2 moms liked this
Married 30 years, 2 grandchildren, and 49 years old, I would welcome a catcall or two. Lol.
meriana
by Platinum Member on Aug. 20, 2014 at 10:10 AM

Haven't gotten anything like that in years, however when I was much younger I'd get them occassionally. It never bothered me at all. For one thing I was a very shy person with rather low self-esteem so it was a bit of an ego boost. I do think it's somewhat different these days as back then it amounted to a whistle, off color comments about one's body parts, etc. weren't common, at least not where I grew up.

Years ago there was a woolworth's store in Seattle. The store had a pet mina bird in the basement shopping area. The bird in it's cage was hung fairly high up so it wasn't something one noticed when entering the area. Whenever an attractive girl or woman walked nearby or under the cage, that bird would let out one loud wolf-whistle. It was hilarious. Women would suddenly turn around to see who did it, look up, realize it was the bird and just crack up laughing.

KimmyShaw
by Member on Aug. 20, 2014 at 10:38 AM

Its very degrading!

tiffyhamm
by on Aug. 20, 2014 at 10:42 AM

They don't bother me. 

babyspots17
by Bronze Member on Aug. 20, 2014 at 10:51 AM

As long as they aren't dirty and uncalled for they don't really bother me. 

GLWerth
by Gina on Aug. 20, 2014 at 10:53 AM

Degrading to women and the men who use them.

If your most meaningful interaction with a member of the opposite sex is shouting at them from a distance, you need either more to do or a better set of social skills.

skittleshawk
by Member on Aug. 20, 2014 at 11:37 AM
Everyone bitching is either too old or to fat to get cat called.the author of the article seems super jealous
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