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Christian Domestic Discipline

Posted by on Aug. 21, 2009 at 3:04 PM
  • 41 Replies

The honor killing post got me thinking about abusive dynamics in other religions and how the, some might argue, misinterpretation of any holy book can create a climate of abuse against women.  This is taken from the website: www.christiandomesticdiscipline.com

What is CDD?

A Domestic Discipline (DD) marriage is one in which one partner is given authority over the other, and has the means to back up that authority, usually by spanking. The application and practise of DD in each marriage is as unique as the individuals who make up that marriage. There is no "One Ring of Power" in the Domestic Discipline world, to which all DD couples must bow; no singular path to "true DD enlightenment". What works well for one DD couple may not be a good fit for another marriage. Therefore, you may see many different suggestions espoused on this site and elsewhere.

A Christian Domestic Discipline (CDD) marriage is simply a traditional, male-led, Christian marriage which utilises aspects of Domestic Discipline. It is set up according to Biblical standards.

Therefore, in a CDD marriage, the husband is the authority of the household.
The wife is submissive to her husband as if the Lord Himself was her husband.

The husband is to love his wife as himself, and as Christ loved the church. He is to be a servant, and leads by example. He is to lay down his life for her.
The wife is to reverence her husband. She is to obey him, so long as his instructions are not in opposition to God's commands.

He has the ultimate authority in his household, but this authority is tempered with the knowledge that he will answer to God for his actions and decisions. The final decision rests with him, and therefore, the final responsibility, whatever the outcome, is his to bear. A wise husband will not make a major decision without prayerfully asking God for wisdom, and without seeking his wife's counsel.

He is to be the head of the home. She is to be the heart of the home.

He is not a dictator. She is not a doormat.

He is not a overbearing Lord of the Estate, seeking to trample over his family. She is not some weak-minded lass, needing to be molly-coddled, or seeking to get straightened around.

He has the responsibility for leading his family and is accountable before God for their well-being and development. He has the authority to spank his wife for disciplinary reasons, but in real CDD marriages, this authority is taken quite seriously and usually happens rarely. Most CDD marriages do use spanking, generally for serious offences, such as the "Four D's" (Disobedience, Disrespect, Dishonesty, or Dangerous [as in dangerous choices... reckless driving, disobeying doctor's orders, etc]). Some CDD marriages also use non-corporal disciplines, such as writing lines, or the temporary forfeiture of a favourite privilege. Again, every marriage is unique, and CDD is much more than just corporal punishment or spanking.

CDD is not a "magic pill", and this website does not claim CDD will prevent all marital rows. It is simply a tool, one method which many couples round the world feel is quite effective in strengthening their marriages, and improving the quality of their relationship.

CDD is the husband loving his wife enough to patiently guide and unselfishly cherish her.
CDD is the wife loving her husband enough to follow his leadership and trust his direction.
A Christian marriage should embody selfless love and true romance.
A Christian couple is to be a reflection of Jesus and His Bride.

If you are not a Christian would this cause you to look at Christians differently?

If you are a Christian would you be comfortable with people of other faiths assuming that this is the dynamic in your home?

 

by on Aug. 21, 2009 at 3:04 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Kays_Mama06
by on Aug. 21, 2009 at 3:08 PM

I would hope that Christians following this lifestyle would be in the minority within the Christians of the world.

This just doesn't seem very Christ-like to me. 

 


iluvmommyhood58
by Bronze Member on Aug. 21, 2009 at 3:22 PM

As a Christian, I agree with the portion in red. I do not agree that I look at my husband as if he is God, Himself. That's ridiculous. But, in the home, as a Christian and believing God's intent for marriage, I believe a husband is the head of the house, that includes the negative sides of responsibility, as well. 

Now the spanking... GOOD... GRIEF. She is a wife, not a child. In a husband's answering to God, in this belief, do we believe God is going to take a husband over His knee? No, that would be disrespectful. Likewise, it's disrespectful to his wife to undermine her like that. 

On another note, sounds kinky... lol. 

Quoting JakeandEmmasMom:

The honor killing post got me thinking about abusive dynamics in other religions and how the, some might argue, misinterpretation of any holy book can create a climate of abuse against women.  This is taken from the website: www.christiandomesticdiscipline.com

What is CDD?

A Domestic Discipline (DD) marriage is one in which one partner is given authority over the other, and has the means to back up that authority, usually by spanking. The application and practise of DD in each marriage is as unique as the individuals who make up that marriage. There is no "One Ring of Power" in the Domestic Discipline world, to which all DD couples must bow; no singular path to "true DD enlightenment". What works well for one DD couple may not be a good fit for another marriage. Therefore, you may see many different suggestions espoused on this site and elsewhere.

A Christian Domestic Discipline (CDD) marriage is simply a traditional, male-led, Christian marriage which utilises aspects of Domestic Discipline. It is set up according to Biblical standards.

Therefore, in a CDD marriage, the husband is the authority of the household.
The wife is submissive to her husband as if the Lord Himself was her husband.

The husband is to love his wife as himself, and as Christ loved the church. He is to be a servant, and leads by example. He is to lay down his life for her.
The wife is to reverence her husband. She is to obey him, so long as his instructions are not in opposition to God's commands.

He has the ultimate authority in his household, but this authority is tempered with the knowledge that he will answer to God for his actions and decisions. The final decision rests with him, and therefore, the final responsibility, whatever the outcome, is his to bear. A wise husband will not make a major decision without prayerfully asking God for wisdom, and without seeking his wife's counsel.

He is to be the head of the home. She is to be the heart of the home.

He is not a dictator. She is not a doormat.

He is not a overbearing Lord of the Estate, seeking to trample over his family. She is not some weak-minded lass, needing to be molly-coddled, or seeking to get straightened around.

He has the responsibility for leading his family and is accountable before God for their well-being and development. He has the authority to spank his wife for disciplinary reasons, but in real CDD marriages, this authority is taken quite seriously and usually happens rarely. Most CDD marriages do use spanking, generally for serious offences, such as the "Four D's" (Disobedience, Disrespect, Dishonesty, or Dangerous [as in dangerous choices... reckless driving, disobeying doctor's orders, etc]). Some CDD marriages also use non-corporal disciplines, such as writing lines, or the temporary forfeiture of a favourite privilege. Again, every marriage is unique, and CDD is much more than just corporal punishment or spanking.

CDD is not a "magic pill", and this website does not claim CDD will prevent all marital rows. It is simply a tool, one method which many couples round the world feel is quite effective in strengthening their marriages, and improving the quality of their relationship.

CDD is the husband loving his wife enough to patiently guide and unselfishly cherish her.
CDD is the wife loving her husband enough to follow his leadership and trust his direction.
A Christian marriage should embody selfless love and true romance.
A Christian couple is to be a reflection of Jesus and His Bride.

If you are not a Christian would this cause you to look at Christians differently?

If you are a Christian would you be comfortable with people of other faiths assuming that this is the dynamic in your home?

 


JakeandEmmasMom
by Platinum Member on Aug. 21, 2009 at 3:47 PM

In researching this lifestyle I came to realize that it is much more prevelant than I would have thought.  Not that it is the majority of Christians, but it is a much larger minority than I think some people realize. 

Also, for the women I have talked to who are in this lifestyle, spankings are more common than this website would have one believe.  The women I have spoken with tend to get spanked at least monthly, if not weekly.  And the spankings are brutal.  Often with implements and it's not unheard of to cause severe bruising.

margroc
by on Aug. 21, 2009 at 3:49 PM

Geez Louise!  Gobsmacked!

Quoting JakeandEmmasMom:

In researching this lifestyle I came to realize that it is much more prevelant than I would have thought.  Not that it is the majority of Christians, but it is a much larger minority than I think some people realize. 

Also, for the women I have talked to who are in this lifestyle, spankings are more common than this website would have one believe.  The women I have spoken with tend to get spanked at least monthly, if not weekly.  And the spankings are brutal.  Often with implements and it's not unheard of to cause severe bruising.


“The state has no business in the bedrooms of the nation.” - Pierre E. Trudeau
JakeandEmmasMom
by Platinum Member on Aug. 21, 2009 at 3:49 PM

Yes, the red part is actually Biblical and I think that most mainstream Christians would agree with the red.  In fact, this is how my home functions.  However, it is troubling that it is used to justify abuse.  No?

Quoting iluvmommyhood58:

As a Christian, I agree with the portion in red. I do not agree that I look at my husband as if he is God, Himself. That's ridiculous. But, in the home, as a Christian and believing God's intent for marriage, I believe a husband is the head of the house, that includes the negative sides of responsibility, as well. 

Now the spanking... GOOD... GRIEF. She is a wife, not a child. In a husband's answering to God, in this belief, do we believe God is going to take a husband over His knee? No, that would be disrespectful. Likewise, it's disrespectful to his wife to undermine her like that. 

On another note, sounds kinky... lol. 

Quoting JakeandEmmasMom:

The honor killing post got me thinking about abusive dynamics in other religions and how the, some might argue, misinterpretation of any holy book can create a climate of abuse against women.  This is taken from the website: http://www.christiandomesticdiscipline.com/

What is CDD?

A Domestic Discipline (DD) marriage is one in which one partner is given authority over the other, and has the means to back up that authority, usually by spanking. The application and practise of DD in each marriage is as unique as the individuals who make up that marriage. There is no "One Ring of Power" in the Domestic Discipline world, to which all DD couples must bow; no singular path to "true DD enlightenment". What works well for one DD couple may not be a good fit for another marriage. Therefore, you may see many different suggestions espoused on this site and elsewhere.

A Christian Domestic Discipline (CDD) marriage is simply a traditional, male-led, Christian marriage which utilises aspects of Domestic Discipline. It is set up according to Biblical standards.

Therefore, in a CDD marriage, the husband is the authority of the household.
The wife is submissive to her husband as if the Lord Himself was her husband.

The husband is to love his wife as himself, and as Christ loved the church. He is to be a servant, and leads by example. He is to lay down his life for her.
The wife is to reverence her husband. She is to obey him, so long as his instructions are not in opposition to God's commands.

He has the ultimate authority in his household, but this authority is tempered with the knowledge that he will answer to God for his actions and decisions. The final decision rests with him, and therefore, the final responsibility, whatever the outcome, is his to bear. A wise husband will not make a major decision without prayerfully asking God for wisdom, and without seeking his wife's counsel.

He is to be the head of the home. She is to be the heart of the home.

He is not a dictator. She is not a doormat.

He is not a overbearing Lord of the Estate, seeking to trample over his family. She is not some weak-minded lass, needing to be molly-coddled, or seeking to get straightened around.

He has the responsibility for leading his family and is accountable before God for their well-being and development. He has the authority to spank his wife for disciplinary reasons, but in real CDD marriages, this authority is taken quite seriously and usually happens rarely. Most CDD marriages do use spanking, generally for serious offences, such as the "Four D's" (Disobedience, Disrespect, Dishonesty, or Dangerous [as in dangerous choices... reckless driving, disobeying doctor's orders, etc]). Some CDD marriages also use non-corporal disciplines, such as writing lines, or the temporary forfeiture of a favourite privilege. Again, every marriage is unique, and CDD is much more than just corporal punishment or spanking.

CDD is not a "magic pill", and this website does not claim CDD will prevent all marital rows. It is simply a tool, one method which many couples round the world feel is quite effective in strengthening their marriages, and improving the quality of their relationship.

CDD is the husband loving his wife enough to patiently guide and unselfishly cherish her.
CDD is the wife loving her husband enough to follow his leadership and trust his direction.
A Christian marriage should embody selfless love and true romance.
A Christian couple is to be a reflection of Jesus and His Bride.

If you are not a Christian would this cause you to look at Christians differently?

If you are a Christian would you be comfortable with people of other faiths assuming that this is the dynamic in your home?

 


 

Stefanie1085
by Silver Member on Aug. 21, 2009 at 3:49 PM


Quoting JakeandEmmasMom:

In researching this lifestyle I came to realize that it is much more prevelant than I would have thought.  Not that it is the majority of Christians, but it is a much larger minority than I think some people realize. 

Also, for the women I have talked to who are in this lifestyle, spankings are more common than this website would have one believe.  The women I have spoken with tend to get spanked at least monthly, if not weekly.  And the spankings are brutal.  Often with implements and it's not unheard of to cause severe bruising.

That's insane!

BTW, thanks for the post. Extremism is bad, no matter what religion, and needs to be recognized as what it is and not used as a representative of the entire religion.

Raintree
by Ruby Member on Aug. 21, 2009 at 3:53 PM

Well. Mostly, when I think about this kind of thing, I have the feeling that it's really not about what the Bible says, but about some weird fetish the people that practice it have, and want an excuse for.


The liberal person shall be enriched, and he who waters shall himself be watered. Proverbs 11:25

PamR
by Pam on Aug. 21, 2009 at 4:03 PM

Now you know that spanking business is just an excuse to get kinky.

What I think about this is that insecure people need this kind of life.  If it works for them, it's none of my business, but it would never work for me.

JakeandEmmasMom
by Platinum Member on Aug. 21, 2009 at 4:11 PM


Quoting PamR:

Now you know that spanking business is just an excuse to get kinky.

What I think about this is that insecure people need this kind of life.  If it works for them, it's none of my business, but it would never work for me.


I thought so too, at first.  But after talking to many practitioners of this lifestyle, I honestly don't believe it is a sexual thing at all.  It has all of the traditional signs of domestic violence, it is just wrapped up in a religious package.

 

 

PamR
by Pam on Aug. 21, 2009 at 4:20 PM

I was just kidding.  Actually, I think it does fall under domestic violence.  

Personally, I don't get this lifestyle at all.   I think these folks have some major issues that have nothing to do with religion.

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