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Modesty is not a competition

Posted by on Oct. 19, 2009 at 11:05 PM
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 Hey ladies, I just wanted to remind everyone that this isn't a group to see who is the most modest.

I know there was a post a few weeks back about head coverings and the non-head coverings moms feeling out of place.  I just wanted to say that all are welcome here.  Please remember that modesty is very personal and we all come from different backgrounds so it's natural for us all to take different approaches.

So I just wanted to say that it doesn't matter how you define modesty, you're welcome here!

Our group is growing and we have A LOT of moms of different faiths coming in and I look forward to learning a lot more in the coming weeks.  

Have a great week everyone!

by on Oct. 19, 2009 at 11:05 PM
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Replies (1-10):
proud2Bmomma
by on Oct. 19, 2009 at 11:14 PM

I was one of the non-head covering moms that entered into that discussion which I felt was and stayed very civil.  I would just like to clarify that I never felt "unwelcome".  I just wasn't sure if this was a good fit for me.  But I'm still here.  :)  So obviously I decided the group was a fit!!  Hoping I've never made any one else feel unwelcome on my end . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

MamaKalila
by Bronze Member on Oct. 19, 2009 at 11:20 PM

Very well put...  :-)   The fact that despite having modesty in common we're still very different  in it is one thing I like about this group.

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Syra3.14159
by on Oct. 20, 2009 at 8:45 AM

I was very impressed at allt he definitions of modesty in the get to know you section.  This is a really neat group.

Mother of Esther (8), Sophia (6), Basil (3) and Jonah born last March
http://www.freewebs.com/syrascribbles/
RissaBusch
by Group Owner on Oct. 20, 2009 at 9:30 AM

Nope not at all.  I think you bring and awesome perspective and awesome opinions to the group. 

Quoting proud2Bmomma:

I was one of the non-head covering moms that entered into that discussion which I felt was and stayed very civil.  I would just like to clarify that I never felt "unwelcome".  I just wasn't sure if this was a good fit for me.  But I'm still here.  :)  So obviously I decided the group was a fit!!  Hoping I've never made any one else feel unwelcome on my end . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .


isra1986
by Group Admin on Oct. 20, 2009 at 9:34 AM

clapping

muslimah
by on Oct. 20, 2009 at 12:38 PM

I wasn't here for all that but I will tell you ladies this, that is why I am not in ANY on the many Cafe Mom Muslim groups. In real life my Muslim Brother and Sister know I no longer cover my head and don't have a problem with it, they see it as my business and not their place to judge then we have Cafe Mom Muslims who do seem to think it there business to the point of even sending me messages and removing me from their friends list. 

  Free Palestine

isra1986
by Group Admin on Oct. 20, 2009 at 2:37 PM

That is terrible!
Sad to say, this is a too common story about some of the CafeMuslimahs.
I have not personally had a problem with them, but I will admit I am careful about what I post.
None of us are perfect. Everyone has things they need to work on in themselves and it's not anyones place to call us out on them :)
sorry that happened to you!

Quoting muslimah:

I wasn't here for all that but I will tell you ladies this, that is why I am not in ANY on the many Cafe Mom Muslim groups. In real life my Muslim Brother and Sister know I no longer cover my head and don't have a problem with it, they see it as my business and not their place to judge then we have Cafe Mom Muslims who do seem to think it there business to the point of even sending me messages and removing me from their friends list. 




RissaBusch
by Group Owner on Oct. 20, 2009 at 2:41 PM

It's not our place to judge.  In the end it is only up to Allah (swt) to judge you on the day of judgement.  No one else.  It's such a personal choice.

Quoting isra1986:

That is terrible!
Sad to say, this is a too common story about some of the CafeMuslimahs.
I have not personally had a problem with them, but I will admit I am careful about what I post.
None of us are perfect. Everyone has things they need to work on in themselves and it's not anyones place to call us out on them :)
sorry that happened to you!

Quoting muslimah:

I wasn't here for all that but I will tell you ladies this, that is why I am not in ANY on the many Cafe Mom Muslim groups. In real life my Muslim Brother and Sister know I no longer cover my head and don't have a problem with it, they see it as my business and not their place to judge then we have Cafe Mom Muslims who do seem to think it there business to the point of even sending me messages and removing me from their friends list. 

 


muslimah
by on Oct. 20, 2009 at 5:47 PM


Quoting isra1986:

 Everyone has things they need to work on in themselves and it's not anyones place to call us out on them


 

 

And girl, I'll tell you what...

These CafeMuslimahs are very quick to do it. In all my life, all the Muslims I have known I have never seen or heard anything like it.

All my Muslim Brothers and Sisters in real life know my iman is not what is used to be and I have in the past year and a half became pretty lax and kind of liberal and not a one of them have said anything to me, shunned me, or called me out on it but these Cafe Moms are a different story. They act as if it is job to call out another. 

 It's like a game who is the better Muslim and who can follow closer to the Sunnah than the other.

MamaKalila
by Bronze Member on Oct. 20, 2009 at 6:47 PM


Quoting muslimah:


Quoting isra1986:

 Everyone has things they need to work on in themselves and it's not anyones place to call us out on them


 


And girl, I'll tell you what...

These CafeMuslimahs are very quick to do it. In all my life, all the Muslims I have known I have never seen or heard anything like it.

All my Muslim Brothers and Sisters in real life know my iman is not what is used to be and I have in the past year and a half became pretty lax and kind of liberal and not a one of them have said anything to me, shunned me, or called me out on it but these Cafe Moms are a different story. They act as if it is job to call out another. 

 It's like a game who is the better Muslim and who can follow closer to the Sunnah than the other.

I hate to say it but I think its CafeMom in general... its like people think it gives them permission to act horribly sometimes. Not everyone does it obviously... and I've met some great women in here... but good grief I've seen some ugly things. I'm sorry this has happened to you though!

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