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How Often Do You Have Sex?

Posted by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 12:03 PM
  • 29 Replies

Just curious b/c my husband and I haven't had sex in 2 weeks.  Before that, it was like a month ago.  We have twins and he's working long hours with his business (no red flag, ladies--there is no other woman or anything like that).  We've fought a lot lately b/c we're both exhausted and need a vacation so bad!! Ha! There are other stresses, too with his family that live close to us (they hardly ever help out with babysitting, etc. and other things-which has angered me to say the least over the last 17 months!).  But anyway, I know we're just tired but I've tried doing all kinds of things--I've trained for a marathon that I'm running this weekend.  I've lost a ton of weight and feel great but by the end of the day--I'm exhausted.  I feel like his attraction for me is going away.  I know I need a boob job b/c the twins completely did a number on them! Ha!! But that will have to come later.  I don't feel like I look bad and maybe it's just some of the fights and exhaustion getting to us.  But he doesn't try to initiate sex.......why??? If any of you have gone through this, please comment and if you think I need tough love, I'm open for criticism, too!! ANY advice is appreciated.  I miss him and I'm lonely!

by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 12:03 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 12:05 PM

I have been married 22 years and we have sex at LEAST 3 times a week, minimum.

by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 12:06 PM

im lucky if i have sex once a month. 
my husband isnt a very sexual person =/  


by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 12:09 PM

We have been through times that were very stressful and rarely had sex, new baby, financial stuff, and working too much. It is normal. Sex is something you want when you are relaxed and happy. It is hard to get in the mood when you have a lot on your mind. I doubt very much it has anything to do with your appearance. You probably need to set aside some time to hang out together and relax. I know it is hard when you don't have family to help out. We don't have anyone to watch our children either.  

We are all shades of gray. It’s been said again and again; life’s a process. We are fleeting moments that come and go, and I am grateful to have my time, my aspirations and my mistakes, my flaws and my abilities. Think of me what you will, but before you do, don’t. Alexander William Gaskarth

by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 12:09 PM

Stacey---congratulations!!! That's so wonderful! How do you both manage to maintain such an active sex life?

by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 12:09 PM

we don't have sex often maybe once every two weeks buts that's b/c of me not him. he would have sex everday i'm just not in the mood ever. 

by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 12:10 PM

my hubby and i are struggling with this right now. If it were up to him, it would be everyday of the week! LOL as for me, I have so sex drive, since my 16 month old was born. I mean i want it like every now and then, but not often at all. lately we are having issues, and he just had surgery on his shoulder 2 weeks ago, so it's tough.  maybe once every other week or so.. I don't sometimes longer then that.

by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 12:11 PM

We went through a dry spell and it was because he didn't think I wanted him because I never initiated it.  So I started to initiate more and now we're back to once a day sometimes twice!

by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 12:12 PM

Once every 2-3 weeks, maybe...
Babies kinda kill a sex life   haha!  wouldn't trade it though!

Honestly - I don't find him all that attractive much...not anymore.
He has gotten comfy with our marriage - and he is a pig!

by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 12:13 PM

I live with my boyfriend and he's ALOT older then i am but no worries everything still works. But he's really tiried all the time and stressed because business is not good for him, he owns his own car dealership and we all know how that is currently.  But i just try and remain patient and understanding which gets old.   Have u tryed the whole dress up sexy thing with candles and maybe some drinks?   If it was up to me i would have sex every single day. lol    does he seem distant?    Good luck!!


by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 12:13 PM

I have the same problem you do, with feeling like by the end of the day I am just too tired and exhausted.  My husband doesn't work long hours but I am in school, work part time, and take care of the kids all day everyday (even when he is home it is practically a one woman show).  I literally have to force myself to have sex sometimes because I am just too tired, too stressed, and too boggd down by babies to get in the mood when all i want to do is relax for a sec.  I would talk to your hubby, he is probably just feeling stressed, and with twins around it makes it doubly hard to find time i'm sure.  try setting up a date night, wear something sexy and get some hot undies...I'm sure its not you, its the situation.  i love my hubby, it hink he is very handsome and has a great bod but i am not sexual right now because there is just too much to do.

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