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Appropriate dicipline for a 7 year old that got suspended?

Posted by on Nov. 12, 2009 at 10:23 AM
  • 16 Replies

My 7 year old son, who has ADHD got suspended from school yesterday, for 1 day, so he can go back tomorrow.  He was arguing with another boy over an item, and my son got angry and decided to try to hurt this boy.  Im trying to figure out a good punishment for him, other than to take away tv, video games and his pokemon cards, because that doesnt seem to phase him.  So far we havent done anything I would consider "fun", I cut his hair and showered him.  And he came up to me and said "This is the best day ever, I love spending time with you" Which is GREAT BUT this should not be something he is enjoying!!

Help!

by on Nov. 12, 2009 at 10:23 AM
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Replies (1-10):
peanutsmommy1
by on Nov. 12, 2009 at 10:24 AM

manual labor, and lots of it. Anything to make his day "not fun" 

 

luvmygirls-rdkr
by on Nov. 12, 2009 at 10:30 AM

being excited to stay home from being suspended isn't exactly the reaction I think the school was looking for.  I would say that he should sit at the table and write an apology letter to the teacher for his behavior and then see if he still thinks this is fun.  The letter might do two things...1-he will have to do something constructive "school like" that if he is a normal boy he WON"T want to do.2-he will have to think of the fact that this has an effect on his teacher.  It might make him think about it next time.

LaurenMarie2307
by on Nov. 12, 2009 at 10:32 AM

As soon as we got home yesterday he wrote an apology letter to the little boy...with out me even asking......

Quoting luvmygirls-rdkr:

being excited to stay home from being suspended isn't exactly the reaction I think the school was looking for.  I would say that he should sit at the table and write an apology letter to the teacher for his behavior and then see if he still thinks this is fun.  The letter might do two things...1-he will have to do something constructive "school like" that if he is a normal boy he WON"T want to do.2-he will have to think of the fact that this has an effect on his teacher.  It might make him think about it next time.


sweettigeress
by on Nov. 12, 2009 at 10:33 AM

I think he needs to write an apology to the boy he tried to hurt. I also think he should do extra chores around the house. You're right, this isn't something he should be enjoying. So make it as dull for him as possible. No tv, no games, no toys, no music. Absolutely nothing. 

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luvmygirls-rdkr
by on Nov. 12, 2009 at 10:34 AM

I agree with this too!!! WORK WORK WORK all day long

mbrackett
by on Nov. 12, 2009 at 10:36 AM

put him in the corner of his bed all day and DO NOT let him leave.  Only to potty and eat.  My DD came home yesterday with a red card for being very bad and I put her in her corner for 2 hours after school.  She was so sad by the end of it she apologized to me and asked to give her teacher an apopgy letter. 

atlmom2
by Ruby Member on Nov. 12, 2009 at 10:40 AM

How and what did you son do to this boy?  How violent was it? 

SamanthaLarae
by on Nov. 12, 2009 at 10:43 AM

You will just have to make him do something he absolutely doesn't like..whatever that may be. Punishments are different for every kid, b/c every kid is different. Maybe make him do some work around the house?? But that's sweet that he wrote an apology letter without being asked :)

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themountainmama
by on Nov. 12, 2009 at 10:51 AM

Grrr...don't you hate it when a negative consequence backfires?? LOL When my now 16yo son was about 4, he was really sick, stayed home from preschool for several days.  During that time, together we made a homemade little stuffed teddy bear, clothes for the bear, a little bed and a blanket and pillowcase for my son.  He had so much fun, couldn't hardly get him out the door once well. 

I think it is just aweful that he didn't have ISS.  I think the school could have handled the suspension much better.  Seems to me they just wanted to deal with him by not dealing with him.  In such a case, I wouldn't double the punishment at home.  He's 7.  He probably realizes there was an issue at school, but I'm not sure a 7yo understands the goal of suspension.  In your son's case, he is getting a positive reinforcement for a negative behavior.  Don't be surprised the next time he wants time with you, he acts out.  The school did a disservice, IMO.

Is your son on an IEP?  If so, you could schedule a review with the goal to be to create a BIP (behavioral intervention plan) that the school implements.  Good luck.

AutymsMommy
by Silver Member on Nov. 12, 2009 at 10:53 AM

Seriously? That is a bit excessive... and not age appropriate.

Quoting mbrackett:

put him in the corner of his bed all day and DO NOT let him leave.  Only to potty and eat.  My DD came home yesterday with a red card for being very bad and I put her in her corner for 2 hours after school.  She was so sad by the end of it she apologized to me and asked to give her teacher an apopgy letter. 


I am a Private School sending, Vaccinating, Non spanking, Nightmare Cuddling, Dessert Giving, Homework Helping, Bedtime Kissing, Book Reading, Academic pushing Mum. I believe in the benefit of organized after school activities. I believe in spoiling my children. I believe that I have seen the village and I do not want it raising my child - I will do that, Thank You. I believe that a woman's place is in the home taking care of her house, children and husband. I am submissive and proud, my husband is head of my home. I am a proud, traditional Roman Catholic, as is my husband... Yes we are teaching our daughter that The Church is the only Church.               Aimee


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