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Stupid Stupid Mom! Can't Do Anything Right!

Posted by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:24 PM
  • 39 Replies

Hi Moms,

I am feeling a bit down and out. I just started going back to work today and have so many things on my mind, that being at work outside of home is another worrisome event. I haven't worked in 5 years and I am downright nervous, let alone having to worry about coming back home late. Do you feel that way?

I worry about coming home late, worry about doing an errand on the way home less I'd be late, worry about picking up the kids on time and getting dinner ready by 530pm. Otherwise, my perfect dh will have a fit. I have to be able to fix dinner in half an hour, an hour is just too doggone long. DH swears "you take to long to cook anything, kids are anxious for food; they are hungry; what are you doing in the kitchen that takes this long, by the time you are done they will be ready to sleep!"

My 20 month old toddler is attached to DH b/c he had stayed home for a whole year w/o work (unemployed for a year; thank goodness he is working now, but just don't want him at home when he is sick) and he just loves Dada b/c he is just so fun to be with. Mama is usually busy doing other things and can't be with him 24/7 like Dada used to. So now, toddler SCREAMS/WAILS AND RUNS AWAY FROM ME when I have to take over some of the duties that Dada used to partake, like getting him dressed for bed and reading to him at nighttime. Now, I am just the "stupid one, what are you doing to him?" I would say "nothing, just trying to get him changed and into bed". Dada screams, "it figures, you are doing nothing, can't you even change him without him screaming?! Next thing I know he'll puke everything out! It is all your fault! You can't even handle a screaming child. What's next? I have to do everything!"

Or I come home from work today and the kids start fighting over who gets what toys. "Mama comes home and the kids act crazy! Just b/c you are here they start acting up. What is it with you? You know what, that is because when I (DH) am not here, they get away with everything. You don't know how to control them. When I am here, not a single fuss. Now look at this, the little one is wailing and the big one (5 yo) is whining. Horrible, just horrible!"

"And by the way, don't even think about getting a good night's sleep. You have to work after you put the kids to sleep. Six hours is plenty of sleep for you, four hrs if you are lucky. Eight hours of sleep is plain lazy. I have never seen anyone waste so much time, just took you an hour and a half just to return stuff to Macy's, go to Costco and pick up a couple of items and pizza, then go to WalMart to get some cheap diapers. Why don't you do something, like keeping those kids in line when I go upstairs for one second to get some soda and not waste time. It took you forever to do three things!"

I really don't know why I drove home like a madwoman just so I could get home in a decent time, but I guess it still wasn't good enough. Nothing is ever good enough. I am bombarded by things I feel I should not be thinking or worrying about. Am I this incompetent? I feel absolutely worthless.

by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:24 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Sagely
by Bronze Member on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:26 PM

 DH's face would have a mark on it.

It'd look a lot like a pan.

BaileynMe
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:28 PM

If my husband talked to me that way, I'd full on slap him. No exaggeration. 

 

charlene_kyle
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:29 PM

Your husband sounds like a jackass. You should NOT put up with that. You are trying your best. You do NOT deserve to be treated like that.  If it were me I would kick him to the curb!

rhismom41
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:31 PM

That sounds like a form of verbal abuse to me! If he's not helping, and making sure he's sharing the load, and supportive then what is he doing? He's not encouraging he's puttingh down!! That's absolutly uncalled for. You are a perfectly wonderful mother and it sounds like you are just trying to make it day to day. That is no way to live your life.

natalies_mama
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:32 PM

if you love your husband, i would definitely think about some marriage counseling.  he has *no* right to treat you that way.  what a f***face!  

wells75904
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:32 PM


Quoting Sagely:

 DH's face would have a mark on it.

It'd look a lot like a pan.


this

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SxyPanamami83
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:32 PM

WTF?? why in the hell do you allow your husband to treat you like that?? if you dont like it you need to kick his ass to the curb or expect to be treated like this forever.

deann66
by Silver Member on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:33 PM


Quoting charlene_kyle:

Your husband sounds like a jackass. You should NOT put up with that. You are trying your best. You do NOT deserve to be treated like that.  If it were me I would kick him to the curb!


natalies_mama
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:34 PM

that, and he's teaching the kids that it's ok to verbally abuse! ย pretty soon you're going to have 3 ppl on your case if you don't do something about it now :(

Quoting rhismom41:

That sounds like a form of verbal abuse to me! If he's not helping, and making sure he's sharing the load, and supportive then what is he doing? He's not encouraging he's puttingh down!! That's absolutly uncalled for. You are a perfectly wonderful mother and it sounds like you are just trying to make it day to day. That is no way to live your life.



skinsfan26
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:35 PM

agreed and i would tell him to cook his own damn dinner.
 

Quoting wells75904:


Quoting Sagely:

 DH's face would have a mark on it.

It'd look a lot like a pan.


this


 

Im a mom that loves to HUNT, FISH. Cheering on my Redskins and Sooners and OKC Thunder. I aint afraid to get dirty. I love driving my 4x4 Blazer in the mud.Im 100% Redneck woman.Oklahoma born and bred!




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