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I need advise from someone not in my family.

Posted by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 4:49 PM
  • 32 Replies

I'm Katie and I am almost 21 with a two-year old that is going through a divorce. My ex wants full custody so that I would only get our daughter every other weekend and on Wednsdays. He says that I'm "emotionaly unstable" right now to take care of our daughter. Part of me wants to fight it but the other part of me understands where he is coming from. I'm not emotionally or finacially stable right now to take care of her. I love my daughter with everything that I have but I think that waiting til I get emotionally and finacially stable is the best thing for her right now. If you have any advice please help me because I don't know what to do anymore.

Katie

by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 4:49 PM
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Replies (1-10):
USMCBride08
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 4:50 PM

It will be hard to get her back, you know this right?  


                            I      <3         Them!

EmilyAnnsMommy
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 4:53 PM

Yes I do and I am ready to fight for her but I dont think that I should have her except every other weekend and on Wednsdays. My mom and my sister are pressuring me to fight for her now but I havent dealt with my divorce yet and until I do that I honestly don't think I should have her

Katie

kristinaleann
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 4:56 PM

That is true. You will have so much trouble trying to get her back. If I was you I would do everything in my will power to better myself before court. Get you a job, seek counselingif its needed.. When you bring your ex back to court to try to gain custody, the judge will not change custody unless you prove that your child is being neglected while she is in your ex'scare..  A judge will not rule your side just b/c "you" think that you are now emotionally and financially stable.. Especially after not going to fight for custody!

You might want to talk to you a lawyer about this. There seems like there are lots of things that you dont know about. Good Luck though...

teachmichele825
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 4:56 PM

You've got to do what you feel is right and best for you and your daughter. I personally would never be able to be seperated from my son, but as long as you can trust the dad, then it is healthiest for her to be in a stable environment.

 

Good luck.

WImom2
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 4:57 PM

WOW not sure what to say. Good luck I wish you the best.

jillbailey26
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 4:58 PM

Do you two live in the same area?  You can do 50/50 custody.  Week by week or certain days.

What do YOU want.  What is your heart and mind telling you to do?  Can you get financially and emotionally stable with her around?

Quoting EmilyAnnsMommy:

Yes I do and I am ready to fight for her but I dont think that I should have her except every other weekend and on Wednsdays. My mom and my sister are pressuring me to fight for her now but I havent dealt with my divorce yet and until I do that I honestly don't think I should have her




mommytothree07
by Bronze Member on Jan. 25, 2010 at 4:59 PM

I think you would make a mistake giving him full custody, it will be very hard to get it back when you willingly gave her up

wife.and.mommy
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 5:00 PM

if you trust her father and you feel its the best thing to do right now, then do it.  it will be very hard to get her back, but in the long run if he is emotionally stable and financially stable right now and you feel you arent it may be for the best.

huggsss and best wishes

canthaveboys1
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 5:00 PM

If anything I would go with joint custody. Once you lose custody it is incredibly hard to get even joint custody back. Good Luck.

amber_mommyof2_
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 5:00 PM

if it were me...not having my kids full time would only make things worse on me. you can work on your emotional/financial situation while still taking care of your daughter. if you let your ex have custody it will be close to impossible to get her back. she might have issues with it in the future too. i could never give my kids up...id bust my ass to fix myself. good luck

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