Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

This really irritated me!

Posted by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:29 PM
  • 42 Replies

I was talking with a group of friends and a new woman joined us. We were all introduced then proceeded to talk about our husbands. She said her husband had been unemployed for 5 months. They have 2 kids who are 5 &7-both in school. She has always been a SAHM despite having a 4 year degree in nursing. She hasn't even thought about looking for a job!  Nurses are in HIGH demand where we live! They are needed desperately! I could see that we were all thinking the same thing. I finally suggested it and she looked at me in horror!  She said she was NOT going to work until she felt good and ready!  Her DH gets unemployment and is looking for a job. She also told us they are on every type of government assistance possible-food stamps, Section 8 housing, SSI-for one child, medicaid. Why wouldn't she want to make things easier for her family?

by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:29 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
ashli488
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:31 PM

because shes lazy...and just wants the goverment to support her and her family

Brianav
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:31 PM

 WOW! If I worked hard to earn a nursing degree, I would sooo want to use it!

momgerke
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:39 PM

 That is total BS- when my husband got laid off I went from working part-time to full-time. No way in hell was I going to have our family suffer nor would I ask for government assistance unless we were in desperate need. Some people are just lazy and expect the government to provide for them, don't get me wrong some people do need assistance but I think a majority of them USE the system- I can remember going to the grocery store and this one women who was dress way better then me and had a coach purse too was complaining about her food stamps "Ugh do I really have to get all of this" I looked at her and said " Yes! you do, I already payed for it" then I walked away!

Mrs.LSU
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:43 PM

why do work when  you get stuff handed to you for free.  well not free for us tax payers who do work hard for our money.  Yeah that pisses me off too.  i can't stand moochers.  and that is a nice word instead of the one i wanted to use.

Toughenough2bme
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:43 PM

 

Quoting Brianav:

 WOW! If I worked hard to earn a nursing degree, I would sooo want to use it!

 

cafemomandcoffee.gif CafeMom image by TIFANIE29

PrincessMermaid
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:46 PM

She gets SS-I for one child? Thats probably the reason right there. Her child is disabled from the sounds of it. My two developmentally delayed younger boys are home with me while DH works and I am a SAHM. If my husband stays with them and I go somewhere alone it is very hard on the kids. They freak out and want their mama, because they are used to having me there and a disruption in routine is very hard for kids with delays or other probloems. For them, I am part of their routine. It seems so easy for many of you to judge but until you have a child like that who is very used to one parent staying home with them and always being there, you have no idea how difficult it can be. She probably wants too, but is concerned about the toll it will take on the child with the problems. I would be too if it were me.

Mrs.LSU
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:54 PM

I have a nephew who is 4 yrs old and autistic.  He receives SS too, but the difference is my sister put him in a special school for him 'free" for her.  He started this year and it has done wonders for him.  He was like that too always wanting her, but its best for the child to get out and learn to be sociable with others.  She knows she will not always be there for him, so he needs to learn to be with other people too. 

That woman and her family are abusing the system. If her husband can't find a job, she knows that she can work and make a hell of alot of money.  We have a right to be upset because its our money she is using. 

Quoting PrincessMermaid:

She gets SS-I for one child? Thats probably the reason right there. Her child is disabled from the sounds of it. My two developmentally delayed younger boys are home with me while DH works and I am a SAHM. If my husband stays with them and I go somewhere alone it is very hard on the kids. They freak out and want their mama, because they are used to having me there and a disruption in routine is very hard for kids with delays or other probloems. For them, I am part of their routine. It seems so easy for many of you to judge but until you have a child like that who is very used to one parent staying home with them and always being there, you have no idea how difficult it can be. She probably wants too, but is concerned about the toll it will take on the child with the problems. I would be too if it were me.

 

linseyfrayer
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:56 PM

why get off your lazy butt and do it yourself when hard wrking tax payers do it for you!

Gailll
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:57 PM

 You may not know the whole story. It is very hard for a child to get SSI. The child's records have to show that the child will never be able to work the rest of their life. I was forced to apply for my youngest son and he had developmental delays, bipolar disorder, asthma, allergies, and the boy in the bubble disease and he didn't get SSI. It is a long and difficult process.

I get SSI because I also have the boy in the bubble disease (genetic, mine was adult onset) and other medical conditions. So I have gone through the process also.

She may need to care for the special needs kid becaue the husband can't, doesn't want to, or she doesn't feel it's safe. Whatever that reason is may be too difficult to share. Her kids may also HAVE to have Medicaid or die and if she goes back to work the kids wouldn't get Medicaid. Some parents with a special needs kid have to get divorced so the kids can get Medicaid and stay alive. You do not know what it is like living in the land of parenting disabled kids or kids with life-threatening/terminal diseases.

Nursing jobs were in demand. Very recently everything changed. I don't know, they may still be in demand where you live but they aren't where we live. My son is a RN and was making $50 an hour. His hospital closed and now he can't find a job. He went back to school and his wife is working full time.

This may be a family in need of as much understanding and help as possible.

Mrs.LSU
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 8:01 PM

See i think the government is weird in that way.  Some get SS when they have a mild case of something.  And others like  your son who is very ill cant' get it.  The government is ass backwards.

Quoting Gailll:

 You may not know the whole story. It is very hard for a child to get SSI. The child's records have to show that the child will never be able to work the rest of their life. I was forced to apply for my youngest son and he had developmental delays, bipolar disorder, asthma, allergies, and the boy in the bubble disease and he didn't get SSI. It is a long and difficult process.

I get SSI because I also have the boy in the bubble disease (genetic, mine was adult onset) and other medical conditions. So I have gone through the process also.

She may need to care for the special needs kid becaue the husband can't, doesn't want to, or she doesn't feel it's safe. Whatever that reason is may be too difficult to share. Her kids may also HAVE to have Medicaid or die and if she goes back to work the kids wouldn't get Medicaid. Some parents with a special needs kid have to get divorced so the kids can get Medicaid and stay alive. You do not know what it is like living in the land of parenting disabled kids or kids with life-threatening/terminal diseases.

Nursing jobs were in demand. Very recently everything changed. I don't know, they may still be in demand where you live but they aren't where we live. My son is a RN and was making $50 an hour. His hospital closed and now he can't find a job. He went back to school and his wife is working full time.

This may be a family in need of as much understanding and help as possible.


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)