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Potty training, HELP!!

Posted by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:12 PM
  • 7 Replies

My daughter is 2 1/2 and we've been trying so hard to potty train her for a year now. I feel like I've read and tried everything, but nothing will work.

I know they say if its just not working, stop and try again in a month, so we've taken a few breaks, but she just does not understand. She tells me when she has to go potty, and she hates diapers, but she won't go in the potty, she will stand next to it and go, but only once in an entire year did she go in the potty.

There are some complications - 1: her dad and I share custody and he has her 2 nights a week... he is a pathological liar (will so much as lie to me about what she ate for lunch or other stupid non issues just because) so I really have no idea what is going on in his house for potty training. He tells me she's 100% potty trained there, and goes on her "princess potty chair" and he has one that goes on the reg toilet to make it smaller, but ive been in his house (watched our daughter and his other son a few times for him) and there is no potty chair and she had a pull up on and a full supply of pull ups...

2: I work full time and go to school full time, and she spends a lot of time in daycare or with a babysitter.. so we have 2 days a week when I'm home and one of them in Sunday when she's with her dad the whole day.. I don't get a lot of time to work with her on training.

I've tried treats for going on the potty, candy or stickers, and for a while she was scared of the potty so she got them just for trying, but started abusing that, and now isnt scared just refuses to pee or poop IN the potty just will do it next to it.

Help!! I am getting so discouraged and shes supposed to start school in about 7 mos and has to be potty trained before then!

by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:12 PM
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Replies (1-7):
BaileynMe
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:16 PM

Mine is 2 1/2 and just doesn't care, LOL. 

If I were you I'd keep working on it as frequently as possible. I know consistency is a BIG deal in potty training, but your situation obviously makes that difficult. She does, however, seem totally interested, maybe just a bit confused, so keep trying mama. Take her potty whenever possible. 



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2girlsMom.MN
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:18 PM

 1. You started training to early 1.5 is typically to early to start

2. the more you push the more of a power struggle and resistant they are

3. Pullups make potty training harder...they are so asorbant that kids love to pee in them

4.You can't bounce back and forth with training, Dad,you and the sitter have to be on the same page

Start training like this.... no sippys in bed or anywhere near bed time. When she wakes up from both nap and bedtime in the morning immediately bring her to the potty she should be dry and ready to pee. After she has mastered this, then start mastering more times throughout they day. After she has a good handle on it or if you want now take the diapers and pullups away. Buy lots of underpants you will need lots. She will have accidents and be immediately uncomfortable, don't run to her let her come tell you she's wet, let her be a lil uncomfortable for awhile. Have the potty chair near by at all times, if need be buy more than one potty chair.

 

Look for signs that she really is ready. My dd is 20mos. She has pee peed on the potty like 5x but we are not training and she is not ready. We are getting her use to the idea, making it fun but I don't tell her to go potty.  It's not a issue in our house. We have a potty chair in the bathroom and she loves to sit on it and mock what we do. The 5x she has pottied were flukes I don't think she knew what she was doing. I'm not going to potty train until my dd shows a bit more interest, is more verbal and mature.

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m0m2x
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:28 PM

My son was hard to potty train as well.  I ended up just putting him in underware and letting him pee on himself, because he didnt like it, so it got him going in the toliet.  I had several messes to clean up, but it was worth it to me.  Not sure how it would work for you at the daycare, perhaps ask them to help out, by having her go on more potty breaks.

Wiifeytype1025
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:40 PM

Well, we started training because the ped gave us a list of things that mean shes ready for potty training... she met all of them. She has always been very advanced in speech and could speak full sentences by 18 mos, and told us when she had to potty, woke up dry from naps/night time, pooped at the same time every day, etc..... so thats why we started earlier than normal.. and the last and only time she peed in the potty I think was by accident, but we did the 3 day training thing around 20 mos and that was when she went.

Her dad is IMPOSSIBLE to work with, and when I say that I absolutely mean it. I mean he has even said to me he will not train her until I do.... (fill in the blank) he uses it to get his way for things, and won't even be honest with me about what she does there or anything. I can't do anything about that, so I just work on what I can do to try to get her trained.. the babysitter/daycare are awesome about working on training too, but won't put her in panties until she will start going on the potty.. due to messes on their floors/carpets

Here at home we go just in panties while we're home but put on pull ups to leave the house.. and she also holds it for long periods of time until she goes so much it will soak through her pull ups and pants and she thinks its funny (it's not!)

Thanks for the tips though, I think I will put a potty right in the bedroom so she can go right there when she wakes up, thats a good idea! Because I think a lot of times before she can even get to her potty she has already peed on the way there, and other times she just thinks its funny to get up and pee on the floor next to it..

Quoting 2girlsMom.MN:

 1. You started training to early 1.5 is typically to early to start

2. the more you push the more of a power struggle and resistant they are

3. Pullups make potty training harder...they are so asorbant that kids love to pee in them

4.You can't bounce back and forth with training, Dad,you and the sitter have to be on the same page

Start training like this.... no sippys in bed or anywhere near bed time. When she wakes up from both nap and bedtime in the morning immediately bring her to the potty she should be dry and ready to pee. After she has mastered this, then start mastering more times throughout they day. After she has a good handle on it or if you want now take the diapers and pullups away. Buy lots of underpants you will need lots. She will have accidents and be immediately uncomfortable, don't run to her let her come tell you she's wet, let her be a lil uncomfortable for awhile. Have the potty chair near by at all times, if need be buy more than one potty chair.

 

Look for signs that she really is ready. My dd is 20mos. She has pee peed on the potty like 5x but we are not training and she is not ready. We are getting her use to the idea, making it fun but I don't tell her to go potty.  It's not a issue in our house. We have a potty chair in the bathroom and she loves to sit on it and mock what we do. The 5x she has pottied were flukes I don't think she knew what she was doing. I'm not going to potty train until my dd shows a bit more interest, is more verbal and mature.


Shaynas_Mommy
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:54 PM

 Give her time. My DD is 3 and just started using the potty 2 days ago. Put her in regular underwear or let her go naked. Pull-ups are a waste of money. Most importantly, she will NOT go until she is ready, you can try everything under the sun, but she will not go until she is ready, no matter how ready you are.

PeaceMuch
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 4:28 PM

 So true! My son is almost 4 and has been potty training for about 3 months. He had everything checked off on that list too (for potty training) when he was 2. But he was not mature enough I guess. But one day after working with him consistantly it just clicked. I wish her dad wasn't such a butt about it. That must make it hard. :(
Good luck, I know how hard it can get!

Quoting Shaynas_Mommy:

 Give her time. My DD is 3 and just started using the potty 2 days ago. Put her in regular underwear or let her go naked. Pull-ups are a waste of money. Most importantly, she will NOT go until she is ready, you can try everything under the sun, but she will not go until she is ready, no matter how ready you are.

 

Wiifeytype1025
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 5:58 PM

Oh its not just this.. he is awful about everything, no clue how he can have custody. :-/

Quoting PeaceMuch:

 So true! My son is almost 4 and has been potty training for about 3 months. He had everything checked off on that list too (for potty training) when he was 2. But he was not mature enough I guess. But one day after working with him consistantly it just clicked. I wish her dad wasn't such a butt about it. That must make it hard. :(
Good luck, I know how hard it can get!

Quoting Shaynas_Mommy:

 Give her time. My DD is 3 and just started using the potty 2 days ago. Put her in regular underwear or let her go naked. Pull-ups are a waste of money. Most importantly, she will NOT go until she is ready, you can try everything under the sun, but she will not go until she is ready, no matter how ready you are.

 


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