Why do they always call me?

:-( Im going through that now ive always been a strong woman and moved on.. easy.. but me n my babies father is staying together and i just had a baby jan so i dont have a job and dont have anywhere to go... so im stuck pretty much.. maybe thats y they stick around? i try to get him to leave but he wont soooo.....

Well... both these girls have the means to take care of them selves. And they say that they will, and they are better off, and then all of a sudden, these idiots are back, and things are good for a few weeks, and then BAM! Same shit all over again. And I will tell you something, I understand the being stuck thing. I have 3 kids and I havn't worked in forever, but that doesn't mean you can't do it your self. Every state has programs set up for single moms. Just do your research. You wont be able to stay home with your children all day (unles you work nights) But if you don't want to be with him, then don't! There are so many options for single moms!

Becuz u r a good friend... Baby doll thats me too... And dont u know when my world got turned upside down a whole bunch of these friends who piled their crap on my shoulders threw their hands up n walked away cuz they couldnt take ME crying... really i listened to u bitch the last 8 yrs about the married man ur fucking not giving u this or that and no matter how sick i got of hearing it... I listened and empathized... But u walk away cuz u cant understand why my first love breaking up with me for a chick hed been seeing behind my back for five months shattered me? Really? Wow! Opened my eyes big time... I am still a good friend to everyone and dont mind being the sympathic shoulder but i often tst friends n if they cant be my rock in return they often get turned away. Buh bye haha

The few occosions I have truely needed a friend, most of mine were no where to be found. But it shows you who your true friends are... Thats why I don't have many. I guess I don't mind being the should to cry on. But why ask for my advice, tell me that maybe its the best that they walk away, and then come crying back about the same thing a month later? You know hes going to hurt you... So I guess I'm more irritated, not because shes calling me, but that because she can't seem to pick her head up and walk away from a boy who can't be a man.

I guess you could take it as a compliment, but I could see how it would be frustrating.

 That's what happens when you are the level headed one. I'm afraid that your friends are getting sucked in by the charming "honeymoon" stage of the relationship. He's going to change, please take me back, I love you, BS! Because it never happens, they go back to the way they were and they never change. Thinking your friends need a wake up call to get out of the cycle or rut they are stuck in. Good luck with trying to convince them of that though.

If you haven't already done so... besides being an obviously good listener and shoulder to cry on.. I would tell them the TRUTH.  I would tell them that people can only treat you the way you ALLOW them to treat you, and you teach those people that is ok by allowing it over again. That they are the only ones who can make changes, waiting for the s/os to change will waste their precious lives away all while those losers are being poor examples of what a relationship should look like and is acceptable as role models for the kids who are watching all of this. They will think that is what they should put up with in a relationship too.

I would tell them I know this is hurtful to hear and difficult and it hurts me to tell you but I care enough about you to tell you the truth. By staying with these guys you are ALLOWING these thhings to happen. They have given those guys all the power and control over their lives and their childrens well being and they need to take that back . Its the only way things will get better.

I am not judging them (I was them for 16 miserable years and it took my poor kids ASKING ME to leave Their father! I was shocked and so ashamed I left immediately upon that happening and regret forever I didnt years sooner) 

gOOD LUCK

Sounds to me like they want to be with them...They're holding out on hope that they'll change finally, they have children with these men, it's not an easy idea to leave and when you love someone, you truly do hold onto the hope that they'll change this time. Boy am I glad that I have a friend who understands me, my train of thought and why I do what I do, but most importantly, I'm glad she listens, gives her honest opinion and then doesn't come on a website to bitch about me....

Quoting DaMama1927:

Well... both these girls have the means to take care of them selves. And they say that they will, and they are better off, and then all of a sudden, these idiots are back, and things are good for a few weeks, and then BAM! Same shit all over again. And I will tell you something, I understand the being stuck thing. I have 3 kids and I havn't worked in forever, but that doesn't mean you can't do it your self. Every state has programs set up for single moms. Just do your research. You wont be able to stay home with your children all day (unles you work nights) But if you don't want to be with him, then don't! There are so many options for single moms!

It does get frustrating hearing the same problems over and over again. My friend kept telling me how her baby daddy would do this and that, then ask ME what she should do. I tell her and she did the exact opposite. We aren't friends any longer for various reasons.

because the looooooooooooove him!!!! pathetic. honestly, i would tell them to put their big girl jocks on and be a woman, and not a 13 yr old school girl! its mean, but it sounds like thats what they need.