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In your opinion, if another child hits your child would it be okay to hit back?

Posted by on Apr. 23, 2011 at 8:42 AM
  • 22 Replies
My son was punched in the face a few times yesterday. I told my husband about it when he came home this morning. He wanted to know if he punched back and he didn't. My husband was upset and told him to hit back next time. He doesn't want to because that is against the rules and he really, really doesn't like to break rules. Now my husband is mad at him because he won't stand up for himself. So, what is the right thing to do- tell him to fight back and defend himself so this little boy will stop bothering him or have him ignore the boy and let the teachers handle it when the boy hits him? BTW, both boys are in kindergarten and this is the second incident between them.
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by on Apr. 23, 2011 at 8:42 AM
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Replies (1-10):
ceciliam
by Cecilia on Apr. 23, 2011 at 8:52 AM

I would not want my son to hit back. I would tell him to walk a way and if it persisted, then go talk to the teacher.

aydens_mom620
by on Apr. 23, 2011 at 8:52 AM

 we had the same kinda thing going on.  my almost 4 yr old was being bullied, always getting hit and knocked down by a boy in his class at church.  we told the teacher, and so did my ds.  when NOTHING was done about it, YES we told him to HIT BACK!  it only took him hitting back once and now the boy leaves him alone.  my kid isnt a bully, but he dont need people beating on him for it either.

othermom
by Gold Member on Apr. 23, 2011 at 8:54 AM

It depends. If it is on accident then no they are not to hit back. What I tell them if it happens once do not make a big deal about it or tell a teacher. If it happens again feel free to hit back. But do NOT be the first person to hit.

tbosgirl
by on Apr. 23, 2011 at 8:55 AM

I had a problem with my DD in day care. She was being hit and would come home with little bumps and tell me about it. I mentioned it to the day care teachers and owner. They said their policy is to walk away from the bully and they don't do anything about it. That works great for the bully, but what about my kid? When the adults refused to step in, I taught my daughter...an eye for an eye. She got punched in the arm, she punched him back....he stopped hitting her. They scolded her for fighting back...I had words with them...point is, if no one else is going to defend my kid, I'll teach her to defend herself. I'm not going to let her be a victim.

Kiwismommy19
by Diamond Member on Apr. 23, 2011 at 8:56 AM
I don't think anyone should ever hit or hit back. Don't stand there like a rag doll, try to block them if they keep it up. But also at the first chance, get the hell away! I think it's wrong for anyone to stoop to the bully's level of violence.
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rae7111
by on Apr. 23, 2011 at 8:57 AM
Always hit back. Never hit first. But my son will be taught from day 1 to always defend himself no matter what.

If he's outside playing and somebody hits him, he is to hit back, then come get his mama. If he's at school same thing somebody hits him, hit them back then go and tell the teacher.
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KelliansMom
by Silver Member on Apr. 23, 2011 at 9:00 AM

it always okay to defend one self, its never okay to pervoke. like pp hit secound not first and never ever stand there and just take it 

nurbabe82
by on Apr. 23, 2011 at 9:02 AM
Quoting othermom:

It depends. If it is on accident then no they are not to hit back. What I tell them if it happens once do not make a big deal about it or tell a teacher. If it happens again feel free to hit back. But do NOT be the first person to hit.

JeremysMom
by on Apr. 23, 2011 at 9:02 AM
This is how I feel but my husband thinks this will make him a wimp and he will get picked on again and again. I think the teachers handled it well. They sent the child to the office for the remainder of the day and called his parents. Now if the school didn't do anything about it, then I might have to agree with my husband.

Quoting Kiwismommy19:

I don't think anyone should ever hit or hit back. Don't stand there like a rag doll, try to block them if they keep it up. But also at the first chance, get the hell away! I think it's wrong for anyone to stoop to the bully's level of violence.
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ingrid198
by on Apr. 23, 2011 at 9:04 AM

ideally no but at the same time if my son or daughter found themself in a situation like that id want them to defend themselves... my DH would want them to hit back haha

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