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Our CPS case was finally closed!! :)

Posted by on Jun. 20, 2011 at 4:50 PM
  • 40 Replies

After about 8 weeks my families CPS case was finally closed! I was really happy to receive the letter the other day and I know it takes a lot of weight of off my DH. Now that the case is closed I have a few thoughts running through my head and I'm wondering how any one else would cope with this situation.

Long story short: My parents accused my DH of either molesting or messing with my 3 (almost 4) year old daughter. I wasn't one of those people who automatically defended DH bc he was my husband. I took DD to the doctor and everything checked out there. After talking with my parents I learned the reason for their concern was DD's behavior. I never thought anything happened but being a good and paranoid mother I still kept an eye out. I felt guilty for doing that but I know DH understands. Anyway, after being questioned and investigated by two detectives, two CPS caseworkers and a nurse they said they didn't see anything strange about her behavior and they closed the case on the CPS side of things as well as the legal side of things.

Naturally, my DH and I were extremely upset when all of this started. After some time went by we cooled off but, naturally, DH wants absolutely nothing to do with my parents. I can't say I blame him either. In the end, the CPS call my parents made was a follow up on a threat they made us. At first DH was so mad he thought my DD should have nothing to do with them. He didn't want them filling her head with all kinds of things and put things that aren't true in her head. Which, they had actually done unknowingly by asking her specific questions that she took as them telling her something had happened and started repeated these things. He cooled off and I talked to him and we both agreed that we did want my parents to be part of my DD's life. They are a very big part of her life. He's the only dad she's ever known and they both love each other very much. He's always told me he wants me to have a relationship with them as well.

But I don't know how to handle this. I'm still really pissed at my parents but I don't know if I could cut them out of my life completely. I'm starting to worry bc DH got REALLY mad the other day bc I told him I was going to call my mom and tell her if she wanted to skype DD she could but not to text bc i was out of messages. He got really mad that I even brought up the idea of talking to them, which I haven't done since CPS came. I think it's going to be a lot harder to get a relationship going at all with everything that has happened. I don't know what to do and keep thinking about how hard family get togethers and holidays will be now. I didn't think it was a big deal to call her and tell her to get on the computer. I had no intention of having a conversation with her. It's just really hard bc I know DH was really hurt by all this and I was too. I also know that they are my parents and I do love them, even if  I'm really mad right now.. I don't know what to do. I'm not sure how to handle DH getting upset and how far or how fast to have this relationship with my parents progress..

    


     My Silly Bean!!


 


 


 

by on Jun. 20, 2011 at 4:50 PM
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Replies (1-10):
samuels_mama
by on Jun. 20, 2011 at 4:58 PM

Wow why did your parents do that?!?! What made them think your DH would do that?!?!?!

Khuerta
by on Jun. 20, 2011 at 4:58 PM
In all honesty if the accusations were 100% unfounded, I wouldhave NOTHING to do with your parents ever again. Why trust them? You are aware if they took you to court for custody they would stand a chance of taking DD from you? I say this because I have SEEN it happen.
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Mommynwife26
by Brianna on Jun. 20, 2011 at 5:01 PM
I wouldn't be talking to my parents for a long time if they did that.
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saraface5383
by Sara on Jun. 20, 2011 at 5:02 PM
Wow, did you think anything was up? If it was completely false and he was wrongly accused he has every right in the world to tell you parents to eff off. They accused him of something he will never forget and put your daughter through a world of shit. I'd personally tell them to fuck off.
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Debalexxa
by on Jun. 20, 2011 at 5:03 PM
That's crazy....I'm sorry u had to even go through this if they had concerns they should of talked to u and approach u did they really think that they could possibly have a relationship after all of this that u have been through....unreal....I'm sorry again I hope everything works out for u...
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Zoeysmom09
by on Jun. 20, 2011 at 5:04 PM

Sounds like they are very back stabbing. You should put your dh 1st, I dont think I could ever even speak to someone who did that to my DH and MY DD! I personally would cut them out of my life. People who do this are not good people to have your children around

Why did they do this?

noel1979
by on Jun. 20, 2011 at 5:04 PM

My mom did this to us a few times. always unfounded and always on my husband. we don't allow the kids anymore to go near my mom. it will only get worse if u contuine to allow the kids to see them.

othermom
by Silver Member on Jun. 20, 2011 at 5:07 PM

I agreeI would not be spending time with them for a long time

Quoting Khuerta:

In all honesty if the accusations were 100% unfounded, I wouldhave NOTHING to do with your parents ever again. Why trust them? You are aware if they took you to court for custody they would stand a chance of taking DD from you? I say this because I have SEEN it happen.


Kimberly954
by Silver Member on Jun. 20, 2011 at 5:08 PM

Why wouldnt your parents talk to YOU first about the odd behavior? I wouldnt want them to fill my childs head with bad things about her father. I would understand if my DH would never want to see my parents if this happened but then my parents would never do something like that.

Khuerta
by on Jun. 20, 2011 at 5:08 PM
Also, do NOT trust CPS. get a copy of the FINAL reports and make damn sure they clear his name. if it doesnt he will spend the rest of his life watching his back. i have a great friend of mine whose life was ruined by CPS because the baby sitter shook her dd. my friend was 100 % innocent but CPS didnt put that in writing. instead it reads like my friend was found guilty. had that been the case shed be in prison for 20 years. now she may never get her kids back all because she trusted the "case worker" to do her job.
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