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Baby gender issues

Posted by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 2:29 AM
  • 34 Replies

So I am pregnant with my 3rd child. My first 2 are girls. So of course when I told people I was pregnant, the first thing out of there mouth was "Congratulations, hope its a boy" or "I hope its a boy this time". What am I suppose to say to that?... gee, thanks. I really don't care what the sex is and the thing is everyone wants me to have a boy, that it is really starting to get on my nerves. Especially since I never said I wanted a boy. I have always been more partial to girls, so I am totally ok with not having a son. 

I guess people assume my husband wants a boy for the obvious reasons. But my husband doesn't really care. We both just really want a healthy baby. Our 2nd daughter has autism and we weren't planning on having anymore. This pregnancy was a complete surprise,but  I have faith that the baby is fine. But my husband is not as faithful as me, so he is more concerned about having a healthy normal baby than about what the sex is.

The way people talk to me they make me feel like its a curse to have a girl or like my life will never be complete without a son. I wish people could just be happy for me and just hope for me to have a healthy baby. I have gone awhile with just saying thanks but I guess my hormones are getting the best of me cause now I really just to tell a few people off. Especially one person, who is frenemy of mine. She has 3 boys and loves to rub it in my face, as if I care. She has always wanted a girl, but I have never rubbed my girls in her face. I actually felt bad for her, because I would always catch her watching little girls play with longing in her eyes. So I wouldn't even mention the girl/boy issue to her. Before I even got pregnant, if my husband played with her boys, she always has to say something like how she feels bad for him that he doesn't have a boy. I can only imagine what she will have to say if I have 3 girls. Part of me gets offended because I feel like people are putting my girls down when they say stuff about having a boy. 

by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 2:29 AM
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Replies (1-10):
KittyNat
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 2:55 AM

people just forget their manners when they talk to pregnant ladies for some reason. i'm having my second dd and dd1 is almost 2yo. i had a friend tell me "i'm sorry you have to deal with 2 babies at the same time!" excuse me? what if i wanted it that way? just because she doesn't want more kids doesn't mean i don't. and i don't want to be raising babies my whole life, so i'm glad they're close. i wish she knew the joy of having a little girl, but i would never say so.

we thought we wanted a son since we have a dd already, but i was surprised with the sense of relief i felt when the sono showed a little girl. i asked my dh how he feels and he's ready to be done having kids at all with no regrets about not having a son. i guess he knows we're going to have our hands full with the ones we have ;). he's actually really glad too that we're having a little sister for dd, we both prayed for our first to be a girl so we feel double blessed. as long as you and dh are on the same page don't let other people's thoughtlessness get to you. they are entitled to their stupid, wrong opinions too lol.

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jessistarr85
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 3:02 AM

I hope you have a beautifull healthy baby, and a wonderfull pregnacey.

Lillysmom27
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 3:27 AM

I can sympathize with you!  I have a 3 y/o DD who i love! I am about to go into the hospital this am for my scheduled c-section, and we did not find out the gender.  My whole pregnancy was people saying "i hope its a boy" or "wouldn't it be perfect if you had a boy, you already have a girl!"  I honestly do not care what the gender, just as long as he/she is healthy!!!  I am serious! I did get very annoyed with people saying things, but i just turned it into jokes, or i REPEATED MYSELF over and over again!  Just stick to your guns!  good luck to a healthy baby!

 

momtoabackc
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 4:20 AM

I know what you mean. I have 3 boys and 3 girls, but I'm the oldest of 5 girls. My sisters are a LOT younger than me, so I remember vividly people doing that to my mom. My sister also has 3 girls and people did that the her when she was pregnant with the last one. It's annoying. 

I find it even more ridiculous that people would say that to you when you have one with autism. Common sense would tell you that you're far more concerned with a healthy baby than the sex. Even more so than most probably are, just because of what you've been through with your daughter.

Congrats. Try to ignore the ignorance.

LSurvivor78
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 7:01 AM
I understand.. When I was pregnant with my 4th, everyone said they wanted it to be a girl since I had 3 boys already. When that one was a boy as well, everyone automatically asked if we would try again for a girl, lol. A girl would have been cool, but I'm totally happy with all boys!
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BekaBug
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 7:18 AM

hugs i completely understand. dh and i feel the same as yall when it comes to gender. we just love being parents and wish for healthy babies. our first was a girl, our second a boy. when we told every one we were having a boy the first thing out of there mouth was, "oh good, now yall have one of each, guess youre done." no actually we're not. no one was happy about either of my pregnancies and they let it be known. people forget their manners and tact goes out the window when theyre talking to pregnant women. i wouldnt keep my mouth shut. if they upset you tell them theyve offended you. yall never said you wanted a son. especially to your "frenemy". ask her how she would feel if you made statements about her not having a daughter. maybe she doesnt realize how it makes you feel and shes just focusing on her own unhappiness. i wish yall a happy healthy pregnancy and baby. 

marybess20
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 7:48 AM
When i found out i was having a girl with my first pregnancy my sister in law, my dh's sister made all kinds of nasty coments about the fact tjat we were adding another girl to a family with already a ton of girls....i felt like crap. I mean for starters the mood swings i had with my first were insane, and ive always had a love/hate relationship with my SIL anyway....but it hurt me a little, because iwas so so happy! And i cared so much, too much really what my dh's family said or thought.....but we had another girl 22 months later and she was also a true answer to my prayers. I have 2 sisters and we re so close i wouldnt want it anyother way for my daughters. Good luck to you and i pray you have a happy, and healthy baby. No matter what the baby is.:)
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ToraMay
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 8:46 AM

 I had 3 boys (1 non-bio), and was pregnant again. I felt she was going to be a girl and kept getting, "Whatcha wanna bet it's another boy." EVEN FROM MY MOM!!!!

Just ignore those morons and have a healthy happy baby.

Glitter-Bug
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:06 AM

daddys girls for the win!

i feel sorry for him if it's a girl because then that's THREE that have him wrapped so tight he won't know what hit 'em until it's too late!

haha :) i have 3 girls and a boy and those girls have him so suckered :P

p1r4t3cr0pc1rcl
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 10:47 AM

Just tell them to be happy and to wish for a healthy baby. I get how you feel, my inlaws were like that too, I mean I had my boy second, and that is what they said my entire second pregnancy.

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