Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

SAHM need a break too!! Little bit of a vent

Posted by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:00 PM
  • 22 Replies

SAHM's, does your DH/SO give you a break when he gets home? Even if it's only for five minutes to let you shower or just to have five minutes to think? 

I am so sick of SO getting home and spending every waking moment with his cousin (who lives with us), I know he can't ignore him, but he works with him, so he sees him all day and then when he get's home, like tonight, he sat at the table with him talking about horses or something else stupid for two hours!, then we all went out to dinner came home and they talked again for another two hours, and then he say's that he's going to the bar with his cousin!! Ahhhhhh, I just need some time with him without his damn cousin around, and a little break now and then wouldn't be bad either! Sorry just had to get that out before I exploded. 

by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:00 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
by Bronze Member on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:14 PM

tell him, /hopefully he will be understanding and give you what you ask for. Men can't read our thought if we don't speak up they think everything is fine. and to answer you question, yes mine gives me breaks. He may not like that they last longer then he would like, but he knows I need them.

by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:15 PM
Tell him. I have to tell my dh when I need it.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:47 PM
2 moms liked this

I'm not sorry that I can't relate to you.  I feel for women such as yourself who have selfish husbands who won't stop looking after their needs to meet someone else's. 

My husband will often tell me to sit down while he gets dinner/the dishes/laundry/the kids ready for school. 

You shouldn't have to do feel as if you're competing with his cousin.  You shouldn't have to feel overwhelmed and you definitely shouldn't have to beg NOR ASK your husband for help. 

As the saying goes "anyone can make a baby, it takes a man to have a family"

Tell him to step up and be a man.

by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:52 PM
2 moms liked this

One thing I do know is men are not mind readers. I'd suggest you have a heart-to-heart when you go to bed and let him know how you are feeling and request some couple time and some "me time" once a week. Best wishes!

by on Nov. 27, 2011 at 12:25 AM
Yes he gives me a break. As soon as he gets home he jumps right into daddy mode. While I cook he plays with ds. As soon as we're done eating he loads the dishwasher and we have family time. He cooks after work a min 1 night a week usually 2 nights plus we go out to eat once a week. On weekends he lets me sleep in and gets up and makes us all breakfast. Also I go out by myself shopping, gets my nails done, hair done, tanning, lunch with friends etc. Just because you're a sahm doesn't mean that you don't need alone time or couple time. You should talk to him & express your feelings. Maybe he doesn't know how you feel. Sorry, I'm not much help, I've never had that problem. Even when ds was a baby he'd wake up in the middle of the night taking turns with me. Good luck, you deserve a break!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Silver Member on Nov. 27, 2011 at 10:07 AM
Why can't he watch the kids and talk to his cousin at the same time while you go out? I wouldn't give my dh an option. Plus I would say thanks for inviting me to go to a bar with you (or something together alone) so he gets a clue.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Nov. 27, 2011 at 10:10 AM

Better here. now you can refine what you want to say, to him and his cousin.

by on Nov. 27, 2011 at 10:14 AM

i'm not a sahm but i'm very close to being single mom since my husb is on swing shift and hardly home...i know how it feels to need a break...i'm the same way....i do work full time, keep the house clean, try to keep the kids happy and give them attention...i have a 7 month old that has been sick these last couple of weeks and i'm the only one that does night duty when she doesn't...i could use some time to myself...i try to get a 5 min shower, paint my nails, or something small like that...

by Member on Nov. 27, 2011 at 10:17 AM
1 mom liked this

Tell him how you feel. Men are horrible at reading minds. As far  as things in my house. I really can't complain. If I want to go somewhere or do something while my DF is home he just tells me to go. He never complains about watching the kids or helping me do stuff with them. The craziest part of all is that he isn't even there bio Dad.

by Amber on Nov. 27, 2011 at 10:20 AM

That sounds awful. Hopefully you guys can sit down and talk it out.


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)