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opinions please!!!

Posted by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 7:46 AM
  • 7 Replies


.I would like opinions on what I should do.  

I'll give you a little backround on the situation. I have a 14 month old son and a little girl due in mid march.  Currently I am working full time (special needs adults - high functioning but still need help on stuff) I am beginning to realize that my job is beginning to be very (or maybe it has been and I haven't realized it) stressful. Lots of responsibility and more stress than I am beggining to be able to handle. I work in a residentail setting and am thinking of after materinty leave going to a day-hab instead.

Don't get me wrong - I love my job, my co-workers are great and my manager is fabulous. She bends over backwards for us.  And my job also provides great insurance.

My delimma comes when my DH suggested that he get a full time job on top of the self -employment job he already has (he works for himself and it really does bring in $$)  and I can stay home with the kids.  

I would say yes to this but I know that 1) he doesn't like to work for anyone else - he would not be happy. and 2) I'm afraid he's going to be home less then he thinks if he works both a full time job and do his thing. 

Granted I would be the one to get them out to the park and places whereas he would not - he's not a social person. We're planning to home school our kids.

So, what do you think?  

Should I look into a day-hab posistion while out on leave (same pay / benifits)?


Be a SAHM and let DH find a full time job with insurance?  

or is there another alternitive I'm not thinking of?

(I did post this in another group but got 1 reply. I know there's more than that out there.):-)

by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 7:46 AM
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by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 8:21 AM

 heya. I think that you could just give this change a go (you be a STHM and DH work) and see how it goes. congratulate yourself for being qualified for a job like that AND now you also have the experience so if things dont work out you can always look for this job position again and hopefully it dosnt take you to long to find one...

you deffinatley have a lot on your plate Super Mom that you are :)

my DH is pretty much the same as yours. hes currently working from home but hes now looking for an outside job to which is good because I need to be a SAHM for once. i been working my butt off ever since our DD was old enough to be in his care. for the last two years ive studied my ass off as well just so I can back myself up for the future when i need to get back into work again.

and can I tell you how much i LOVE being a SAHM right now. WOW!!!!! I needed this SOOOO BADLY. I couldnt handle working, studying and doing everything else as well especially now that im pregnant.

an other thing you can do is that you could try cut down the work a bit and only do a few days a week like 2-3 days and see how you handle that unless you really need the money...I just thought that by doing this you still keep your job but you also get more time at home...good luck

by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 8:29 AM
If you could be a SAHM that would be the best. You may be more stressed after the baby than you think. back in the day Dads did get second jobs if needed. That's one of the reasons Moms did all the housework and Dad was in his recliner, because he hadworked some long hours. Most men now adays won't do itand then go back in the zone of sitting on their butts while women have the outside job and work the house too. He would be home less,could he get a part time job with benes. Could you guys look at paying own insurance there are co. for the self employed and its a tax deduction. GL
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by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 12:19 PM

 I think it is very admirable of your hubby to offer to work a second job so you can stay home but the option has to be one you want.  I am a in home caregiver for adults with mental disabilities so I understand how stressful it can be. I work partime in home and partime at another job ( merchandizing) This gives me the opportunity to have a break form each job.   My kids are grown so I am not a sahm but when I was I supplemented my income by doing daycare for some neighbors who need someone to watch their children before and after school  With your background you could watch Dev. Disabled kids and parents are always looking for help in that area.   There are at home jobs but I have never looked into those.  I assume you need a job with insurance.  My job with Dev Disabled is only 86 hrs a month and I get insurance but it varies from state to state

by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 6:27 PM

Why don't you both try to look for jobs and see which one is best for your family?  You can always change your mind, right?  In this economy I can't see finding a job that easy...period. (I have a degree in Accounting and have been looking quite a long time now)  Either way it's an ajustment for the entire family.

You're going to be a busy Momma too though...if you ARE going to work, maybe find something part time?

I decided to stay home with my son. After all of the daycare expenses. I may as well be home with him and broke than working every day, not seeing my son and being broke. LOL  

I just returned to work part time (after the adjustment settled down) and it seems to be working out well enough.

Good luck with whatever you decide....and Congrats on your soon to be new arrival!!!

by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 10:16 PM

i have stayed at home and worked and my advise is work. i think you would enjoy your children more if you get a break for a little while even if you only work part time

by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 10:41 PM
I say try cutting back to part time at the job you have, then see how that works out. Make your decision from there, you will know what's best for you and your family, good luck and Congrats!
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by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 10:43 PM

 It's really up to what you think you would want to do. Do you want to stay at home? Some women try staying at home and realize it's just not for them. Maybe try just working part time? What do you think would make you happy?

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