Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Advice for Moms Advice for Moms

My son is 16 months old, and has always been a very smart and active little fella.  He sat up by himslef at 4 months, crawled at 6 mo, started walking at 9mo, and he talks very well already.  My sister in law has an 8 month old baby whom is very different than my son, he is talking his time to do things at his own pace which hey, hes smart, why work when people will carry you around!  Anyways, my SIL has said from day 1, this isnt a competition, which no one tried to make it that anyway, but she is always making snide comments.  LIke telling her baby, with mine sitting right there..."you are so much cuter than your cousin", and then the other day, "Connor is no where near as smart as my baby".  I just about lost it on her.  Im glad that she is proud of her son, and thinks he is the best, but really?  That is not an okay thing to say, maybe in your own home, but you dont say that kind of stuff when your nephew is sitting right there.  To me, thats putting him down when you are supposed to be a postive, confidence building adult in his life. I dont want my son coming home from playing with his aunt asking why he isnt as smart or cute as his cousin.  If the tables were turned she wouldnt like it at all and would be very hurt by me saying it, but the thing is, I would never say something like that. Let alone even think it.  All babies are different.  Am I just freaking out too much about this? What would you moms do?

by on May. 2, 2012 at 1:59 PM
Replies (11-16):
my4kidsrock2
by on May. 2, 2012 at 4:48 PM

I get the whole avoid her thing, but you will have to see her somethimes and even 1 or 2 incidences of your son hearing those comments could really hurt him. I would have a talk with her about and let her know how you feel. If you aren't comfortable talking to her then you should go to your hubby and have him talk to her for you.

MissyB993
by on May. 2, 2012 at 5:29 PM
Thanks ladies. I have talked to her, my husband has talked to her,and even talked to their mom to talk to her. She always plays the stupid card and says "I didn't mean it like that". It's hard not to see her because their family is very involved and she is always over at their moms house. I have just quit going as much as we did when we first got here. The rest of them can come see him at our house when they want. That's what I'm saying...I have to protect him from stuff like that no matter who it is, and just didn't know if I was taking it too far to not see her or what not. But now I do not feel bad!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Venae
by on May. 2, 2012 at 10:02 PM

I wouldn't take my kid around her.  She's a bitch.

lilmomma22487
by on May. 3, 2012 at 10:47 AM

OMG!! She is so jealous of your baby she cannot see straight! That must be why she is being such a Bee-yotch! She should be ashamed. I bet she thinks she is "getting back at you"  by saying these negative things. IF YOU CAN STAND IT, try pointing out all the great things about her son and maybe she won't feel the NEED to downgrade your son. Just a thought. Hope this helps.

MrsRobinson06
by Amy on May. 3, 2012 at 4:42 PM

 You look at her baby and you say "don't listen to your mom, all babies are cute and none smarter than another because all babies learn at different ages". If that doesn't work then you reverse the roles and tell your child that they are so smart for walking at 9 months, crawling at 6 months, etc.. and that they are the cutest thing ever! You can compliment your child in front of her without insulting her own child. You can also say to yours "did aunt so and so hurt your feelings?" Maybe it will make her think.

Bieg9093
by Bronze Member on May. 3, 2012 at 4:47 PM

 I think that's a good thing to nip in the bud early on.  I probably would have gone with "Do you think that's an okay thing to say in front of me?  Do you think I'm keeping score?"  After the backpedaling, I would assure her that I love my nephews very much and that I hope she and my son develop a loving relationship as well.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)