Our family cat(I'll call BG, her initials) of 14+ years has Lymphoma really bad. She was diagnosed about 1.5 months ago and we were told she only had a few good weeks to months left. She was put on high dose steroids that helped and we were told to just watch her for signs of deterioration, otherwise just to love her up while we could.
We were honest with DD(8) about BG's condition and what to expect. She's been aware that we were going to have to put BG to sleep soon so she doesn't suffer when the cancer starts to make her more sick than well. That day is coming upon us now. Up until the last few days BG has been eating and drinking, interacting and vocalizing as usual. Now she's more lethargic, eating less(but still eating), not as vocal or as interactive. Because of vomiting and diarrhea (which is also happening more frequently) we've confined BG to one room. DD has been helping take care of her, we all go in the room a few times a day and spend at least 20 minutes each time holding and loving her. The only thing we have not discussed with DD is the option of her being there when we put BG to sleep. She knows it will happen, she knows we will have her cremated and she knows we will then bury the ashes in our fountain garden with a memorial.
I'm just wondering if it would be best for me to make the decision to do it without DD there or give her the choice of being there or not. She's very smart and a bit mature for her age, but she's still only 8. Anyone else ever dealt with this? Would you give your child the option to make the choice for themselves, or would you make it for them?