i am 41 and lonely. Never did I think I would be starting over at this age. I was divorced in 2009 and basically walked away from it all. Yup I had it all the house, the land, the animals, the new car, the 2.5 kids (only kidding), and MISERY! Long story short what started as verbal abuse ended in physical. But.... I picked myself up, dusted myself off, and I started to move on and Slowly I started putting my life back together. My daughter is now living on her own and will be 21 this year. I will also be a grandmother this year for the first time. I am living in a nice apartment. I am almost done with a bachelor's degree (fingers crossed) and hope to help other victims of domestic violence. My car just blew up (literally the engine blew) so I do not have a vehicle... But I am o.k. with that cuz all in good time. I AM LONELY!!! I have had one serious relationship since then and in fact still have contact with him and his family. Truth be told I wasn't ready and being with him was like being with the intelligence level of a stick. Now don't get me wrong I do not believe I am better than anybody else, but this guy was lacking in intelligence to put it mildly. All there was to that relationship was, well you know the physical stuff. I wanted somebody I could talk to as well... Let's just say there really was not any conversation with him of substance.
Schooling for me is hard due to some short term memory loss from a car accident. However I am doinng well. I am also disabled as a result of this car accident. Basically I live in pain 24/7. I can walk on my own power and I do well on my own. Most days if you do not know me you don't know there is anything wrong. BUT due to one of my pain medications I have gained a great deal of weight... We are talking 100 pounds. Yeah I look like a stuffed burito on top, but still have nice legs. Go figure. So I have done the dating sites only to be lied to and blah, blah, blah... So NOW What.????? Any words of wisdom from anybody out there I am ready for it...
Thanks.
& welcome!
Despite what's gone on in your life, you sure have some positives to look forward to (grandbaby). :)
Thank you so much and you are right I do have a lot of positives and try to look at the positive side whenever possible. I am not unhappy, just lonely. Thank you for your comment... and I cannot wait for my grandbaby.
Quoting amonkeymom:
Despite what's gone on in your life, you sure have some positives to look forward to (grandbaby). :)
Thank you for the advise. I have spoken with my doctor. We did try a different med not too long ago and long story short I had to come completely off one in order to begin another. The pain was unbearable. So awful that I cried myself to sleep and layed on the couch all day. I could not do anything. I was not suicidal but wanted to 'go home'. The end result was going back on the same medication. I said I would rather be fat than live in that much pain. As for joining groups, I was a religious ed teacher every school year for the past 12 years, and I am a full time on-line student. For awhile I was in a support group for those who had been abused via domestic violence. My life is very full. Again thank you for the advice. Since I have recently moved there is a pool in this town. Good idea with the swimming/exercise classes. Thank you so much.
Quoting Bmat:
Talk to your doctor about the weight problem to see if there is some other med. or exercises you can do to help lose some weight and get stronger- such as swimming exercise classes. Join clubs, - such as Lions, political groups, church or other religious groups.
try on online thing called meetup.com.... its local to you and it NOT a dating site... its a site that lets you meet up with people who have the same interest as you ...
First of all I have to say that you should be so proud of yourself! You had the courage to walk away from abuse. Now you are getting your degree. Wow! I think you need to put yourself out there but selectively. If you are religious maybe go to church to meet a guy. Or volunteer somewhere, red cross, food kitchen, hospital. I realize you may be limited to what you can do with your disability but if you can find something that puts you with like minded people in a social setting i think you might find someone, at the very least you may find a new friend.
i have no advice for dating. while im 26. I havent had a date in 4 yrs. im the last person to go to for advice on that one.
Ah my dear, I do eat very healthy as a general rule. I fear heart problems and diabetes as well becuase they both run heavily in my family. I am currently taking heart preventatives (vitamin E and an Aspirin daily) due to this very issue. I also have a low carb diet. I admit to a sweet tooth but do not partake daily nor weekly even.
As for dating, I guess when the time is right it will come along for both of us... and thank you for your wonderful advice.
Quoting Jenn8604:
could u maybe have a special diet worked out by u and ur dr? im more concerned about ur heart and u ending up with type 2 diabetes and not being able to date that man when he comes along.
i have no advice for dating. while im 26. I havent had a date in 4 yrs. im the last person to go to for advice on that one.
Too young for "the talk"????
When was your due date and when did you give birth?
- Momndaughter
on Jun. 29, 2012 at 2:54 PM