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suggestions needed asap! "play with me mommy-non-stop"

Posted by on Jul. 1, 2012 at 8:33 PM
  • 21 Replies


Hello Mamas,

I just joined this site today and am really looking forward to getting some great fun and info out of it.

So, my daughter will be turning 4 in Oct. and literally everyday she asks me and dad (when he's home) to play with her. I've been home with her since she was born and now that she's older she's requiring more attention. I do quite a bit of playtime with her through out the day but she just wants me constanlty. I will play and spend some time with her then let her know that I will be going to prepare breakfast, cook, even use the restroom and she cries and says "no" stay with me. Any suggestions, ideas on how I can deal with this situation??

I am currently 27 weeks pregnant and though I feel a bit more fatigued then before :) I still take her to park, play outdoors, meet with playdates, and she's even in Preschool 2x's week (half day only.) I feel we spend a lot of ALONE time having fun but still not enogh time for her to allow me to do things for myself, around the house, etc, without constantly repeating "mommy play with me".   Please share ideas with me, I'm desperate to try anything. I love her and just want to do what's sane for both of us!

I've been allowing her to watch a cartoon or movie at least 2hrs throughout the day just so I can recharge and be myself again and do the "necessities" around the house. Though, at times I feel guilty but I don't know what else to do.

I ask her to help with organizing, cleaning, cooking when we are at home, sometimes she contributes and other times she doesn't and she just wants me to come play with her. I feel so great when she does contribute because we spend time together and at same time we have a clean house with food to eat!! :)

Ok, sorry for this long post. Looking forward to some great responses!

smiley823






by on Jul. 1, 2012 at 8:33 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Bieg9093
by Bronze Member on Jul. 1, 2012 at 10:00 PM
1 mom liked this

 It's totally okay to tell her no. In fact, I think it's healthy.   Say "It's time for me to do grown-up things while you do kid things." 

If you can make up a schedule for your day and stick to it, that can really help too.  With time, she can learn that mom does mom things after breakfast, but after snack then mom comes back (or however the schedule might work for you.)  Good Luck!

budgie1117
by Bronze Member on Jul. 1, 2012 at 10:21 PM
I totally agree with this!! I'm sure there's some sort of schedule she follows at preschool. Try making a schedule and have time slots for you in there. She sounds like she's very smart and needs stimulations. Does she like dry erase boards or magnets? My kids love to draw and it's one activity I can depend on to keep them occupied while I do whatever needs to be done.
Telling her no is ok. She's not going to be scarred for life. Plus, with the new baby, she will most definitely have to understand that you can't be with her every second. Good luck!


Quoting Bieg9093:

 It's totally okay to tell her no. In fact, I think it's healthy.   Say "It's time for me to do grown-up things while you do kid things." 


If you can make up a schedule for your day and stick to it, that can really help too.  With time, she can learn that mom does mom things after breakfast, but after snack then mom comes back (or however the schedule might work for you.)  Good Luck!


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06katc08
by on Jul. 1, 2012 at 10:30 PM
She sounds like an amazing child and she will understand if you explain that while you love her you and daddy have grown up things you have to do but you will play when your done. Try telling her that you have to be a grown up and do grown up things even tho you would rather play with her. Also, try coloring books or barbies to keep her entertained. Coloring books and cars helped with my son when he went thru that same phase and they are helping my sis and her son now.
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DarlaHood
by on Jul. 1, 2012 at 10:30 PM

Hi, and welcome.  I will first say please don't feel bad when you say no to her.  You sound like a great (and fun) mom.  So what 4 year old would want the fun to end?  You are spending a ton of time with your daughter, so if you have to say no sometimes, you shouldn't feel bad.  I am sure she has lots of toys, but one that I found particularly helpful with my granddaughter at that age is the leapfrog reading system.  Because they can read stories themselves, have them read to them, or play interactively.  Another thing that keeps my granddaughter busy for awhile is my ipad or laptop.  Nickelodeon and Disney have websites with games for preschoolers and kindergarteners.  My gd loves them, and these keep her busy the longest!  The other thing is craft supplies, which are great for little girls (and prob boys, too, but I have only had girls). 

I'm sure some other moms will have more suggestions for you.  Hope you find some that help!

gacgbaker
by on Jul. 2, 2012 at 6:37 AM

I've always done a 'quiet time' with my kids, no matter their age- they know at this time they need to go and read a book quietly or do something, and just be still and quiet and that allows for me to get things done that need done.  Don't feel bad about not entertaining her 24/7- especially since you have a baby on the way she will need to learn that you can't stop everything and be with her.  As long as you are setting aside time with her, it's ok to set aside time for her to learn to entertain herself too.  Good luck, I know it can be hard!


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emmy526
by Silver Member on Jul. 2, 2012 at 8:09 AM

Do you think she is apprehensive about the new baby coming and taking your attention?   That could be why she is craving you so much now--she knows the change is going to take place, and you won't have as much one on one time with her like you do now.  Keep heaping the praise on her for being a big girl/helper, and have you thought about giving her a reward for keeping herself entertained all week when you asked her to?  That might be a goal to work on with her too.  Make a chart with times she can play with you, and times she has to occupy herself..use pictures if you have to, to help her understand what is next. 

freshmom88
by on Jul. 2, 2012 at 9:32 AM
My dd is 4 and she is like that a lot too. I found that she really enjoys playing games on the computer. Some educational like starfall.com and some just for fun like nickjr.com
It keeps her busy. I totally understand because when I have to tell my dd "no" it breaks my heart.
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Bmat
by Barb on Jul. 2, 2012 at 10:28 AM

Make sure she does have things that she can to do entertain herself-  hobbies,  puzzles, books.  Also consider frequent play dates.

SuprMom08
by on Jul. 2, 2012 at 10:33 AM

My DS will also be 4 in October. He is doing the same thing. It is hard to say "no" to that little voice asking "Mommy, play with me." 

goodmom516
by on Jul. 2, 2012 at 11:21 AM

Hello...have you tried play dates with some of the children in her preschool...maybe you can switch off days with some of the parents...i would suggest not having more than one child over at a time cause with more than one you have fights more...but maybe another mom would love to have some alone time also to get some things done...I also agree with the other moms on here it is OK to say no to her...tell her you have to go get this one thing done and you will come and play...maybe tell her to go get the table set for tea and then by the time she gets that done you will be ready to play....maybe try and give her some responsibilities like that also...another thing that i feel is OK is if they have an imaginary friend...my two older boys have imaginary friends and it went well...they eventually forgot about them and it was over...just some thoughts to maybe try!!!

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