Tonight my 6 yr old son and 3 yr old son were in the bathtub. My husband walked in and saw them laying on top of eachother in the tub. My 6 yr old was hard when he had my 3 yr old get out of the tub. When I asked what they were doing my 6 yr old said the were playing monkeys (the baby monkey is on the mommy monkeys stomach) and he said it felt good. He also told my husband that they play monkeys in the closet and in bed (they learned about Africa this week in VBS and I'm guessing this is where it is coming from. They have been running around the house making noises all week.) My husband is freaking out about this and now has me very concerned.
I asked the 6 yr old if anyone ever touched his private area and he told me "no only the dr when we are there for a checkup when mommy is in the room". We have had something like this happen before - they were in the tub together and were touching eachother, in hindsight we should really bathe them separate and we will from now on.
Should I be concerned about this? Is there anything I should do to make sure he hasn't been abused? I don't want to make him uncomfortable and feel like he cannot talk to me about anything in the future. Trying to find out if this is just curiosity or something I need to worry about.
Sounds perfectly normal to me. My guess is that they were playing monkeys recently, his penis was rubbed a certain way, it felt good, and he is trying to recreate it. It doesn't by any means scream "abuse" to me.
It does sound like you need to have a discussion with him about keeping his private parts to himself and respecting the privacy and space of other people. My 2 sons (ages 4 and 18mo) bathe together, and it allows me a great opportunity to supervise and help them to understand boundaries.
To be clear... Are you saying that your 6 year old and 3 year old are in a tub unattended? I can't imagine how it would have gotten to this point if they were supervised.
Quoting LuLuThatsWho:Sounds perfectly normal to me. My guess is that they were playing monkeys recently, his penis was rubbed a certain way, it felt good, and he is trying to recreate it. It doesn't by any means scream "abuse" to me.
It does sound like you need to have a discussion with him about keeping his private parts to himself and respecting the privacy and space of other people. My 2 sons (ages 4 and 18mo) bathe together, and it allows me a great opportunity to supervise and help them to understand boundaries.
To be clear... Are you saying that your 6 year old and 3 year old are in a tub unattended? I can't imagine how it would have gotten to this point if they were supervised.
No, they have never see us in the act.
They do go to family members houses, but usually only my parents who I trust completely.
We are trying to figure out if something happened at school or where he came up with this. He said he just made it up that no one had ever done anything to him.
Quoting LuLuThatsWho:
Sounds perfectly normal to me. My guess is that they were playing monkeys recently, his penis was rubbed a certain way, it felt good, and he is trying to recreate it. It doesn't by any means scream "abuse" to me.
It does sound like you need to have a discussion with him about keeping his private parts to himself and respecting the privacy and space of other people. My 2 sons (ages 4 and 18mo) bathe together, and it allows me a great opportunity to supervise and help them to understand boundaries.
To be clear... Are you saying that your 6 year old and 3 year old are in a tub unattended? I can't imagine how it would have gotten to this point if they were supervised.
Yup, all this exactly
Sounds pretty normal. The fact that he told you it felt good probalby means it's innocent and he has no shame attached to it whatsoever. Usually abuse victims do feel shame. I think it is very normal.
stressing over everything...
- alsblum
on Jul. 2, 2012 at 11:59 PM