Really need help on a tough relationship/parenting situation!!

Nope, no more chances. No passing on of his last name, No mention of him on the birth certificate or any where else for that matter. No having him present for the birth. In fact, don't even waste your time letting him know when you go into labor/ when the baby is born. He's a deadbeat and a skeezy, no good creep. Cut all ties as hard and fast as you can and NEVER look back.

You have given him more than he deserves already...he hasn't earned his right to have his last name passed on.  He hasn't earned his right to be there for the birth.  It is completely up to you whether you put him on the birth certificate...but remember if you do you are tied to this moron for the rest of your child's life.  You deserve better than that and so does your son.  With you in control you get to steer the raising of your son in the direction you want him to go and not the direction of his father's past and present.  Good Luck with this situation.  Have your pity party and then don't let him cross your mind again...he hasn't earned that right either.

Sounds like the only thing you got from this thug is a baby he won't take care of .... cut all ties with him, move on with your life, and be intent on providing a life for your child without him.  Get some counseling to help you through this, cuz it's not easy to do it alone...womens pregnancy centers usually have counseling and access to all kinds of resources you may not know of...good luck. 

Regardless of everything you are tied to him now whether you put him on the bc or not.  I wouldn't invite him to the hospital as it will just start drama, add him to the bc as that is his right as he is the child's father.  Make an effort to let him see him supervised of course or later on when he does grow up and want to be in the your son's life he will make it miserable and you'll be in and out of court.  Hopefully he'll just stay out of your life but i doubt it as most don't.  Next time your dating and your bf has children see how they are with them, because that's how your child will be treated and any that the two of you may have together.  I've been in your situation and learned from it.  Although I didn't have a child with my then bf he had two children and I should have picked up on his relationship with them.  They are now legally mine, and he treated me the same way he treated his children.  I met my dh a few years after there adoption, I watched him with his daughter and I watched him with my children and he is a great father and next month we will have been married a year, but dated three years first.  Him and his ex work together regarding my sd, they have 50/50, work together, never talk bad about one another in front of my sd, they don't always see eye to eye but it is always talked about when my sd is not present.  She is showing no signs of stress, anxiety, etc from the divorce or going from house to house.  I have seen tons of people that talk about there exs in front of the kids or try and work out problems in front of them, and you can see the effect it has on them.  It's hard at times i'm not going to lie but it's all worth it to see that smile on her face no matter who has her that week, and her enjoying spending time with both parents.  She gets the best of both worlds.

I agree to say no to all of your questions.   Raise your child away from him. Nurtured him and get all the help you can get.  The way your boyfriend is, you know you do not want your child to grown up in his environment and later in life treat woman like he did.  Your child can do and have much more without your boyfriend being around.  If you do have to go to court try your best to have information ready for the judge to see what kind of man he is.  Get all your facts and proven information together so the judge can truly see.   Best luck to you and your baby.

Well I was in your situation, and I went my own way.  I did not put his name on the birth certificate, although I always was honest with my dd.  He did not find out I gave birth until 2 weeks after my dd was born.  He said he wanted to be involved, but I felt he needed to prove that it was for the right reasons and that he could be consistent.  I feel strongly that a father going in and out of my baby's life and constantly disappointing her would be worse than him just not being aroudn at all.  I told him he could see her ONLY IF he could prove he could CONSITENTLY provide and show interest first.  He accused me of only wanting money even though I never asked for any child support.  I told him, don't give me money.  Buy her diapers, formula, clothing, shampoo.  I really didn't care what or how much if he would have been consistent.  What mattered to me wasn't the provision, but the commitment to her.  He never bought her a single thing and he saw her one time.

I went my separate way.  I met my dh when she was 18 mos old, and he is her daddy, and the only father she ever wanted or needed.  She did meet her bio father when she was 16.  He had not changed. 

My dd is now 27 and a mother herself.  She thanks me all the time for having the strength to get her away from that toxic person and situation.  He has 4 other kids, all of whom are completely messed up.  She is happy, healthy, and has had a great life.  I have not one single regret and I KNOW I did the right thing. 

I am happy to share more detail with you if you want, I just didn't want to keep going.  I wish you luck and I say go, and don't look back.