My husband and I have a 13 month old son and I am pregnant with number two. every day he comes home and plays with my son and more often then not when my husband is home from work or on his days off my little boy only wants his attention and only wants daddy to play with him (he will actually push off me when he walks in the door to go to daddy. he calls everything daddy.
my husband can tell it hurts my feelings quite a bit and comforts me all the time by saying its just a phase or what not. I understand why my son is like that and it makes sense. im here all day and daddy is only hear on weekends and evenings.
the proble is my husband is very short tempered with our son who is only 13 months old. if my son starts crying over being hurt, hungery, being told no- anything really and cries for too long then my husband starts to yell and shout at him "why are you crying?! shut up! stop crying!" really loud and when im here all day i never yell at him, i tell him no a lot but i cant ever recall raising my voice so when my husband does it i can tell that whatever WAS bothering my son has now passed into fear and so he starts screaming and reaching towards me. I dont want my husband to be the bad guy every time. I explained to my husband that yelling does nothing but teach him to be louder and the loudest peron wins, also i told him that it does nothing but scare him and it doesnt teach him anything, that our son doesnt quite understand why you are so angry.
he responds with " you just spoil him when your hear, and i dont think you give him enough credit. i think he understands my tome of voice better than he understands 'no' and i dont want him growing up spoiled" i tell him he needs to cut it out or hes going to have son that hates him growing up and he will always be the bad guy and never listen to him. he then responds with "ok i understand, im sorry" but it will hapen again next week. wheres the parenting 101 with husbands-i only see ones for moms but none for dads and how to gets dads to calm down.
always about how to control your temper with a mom, but what about the dads who work all day with wives who stay home all day and are blamed for everything that goes wrong? where are thhe parenting magazines and dr. advice for those situations because thats a common situation....