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your stance on child support?

Do u think child support laws should b updated?
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 10:37 AM
Replies (41-50):
Cpdsptchgrl
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 2:41 PM
I think a lot of it depends on the judge. In CO cost of living is addressed in the formula and is SUPPOSED to be considered. However, they pick and choose when. My situation is a prime example. He's finding loop hole after loop hole not to work and getting low income adjustments and exemptions left and right. Yet, I have a friend busting his ass working 2 jobs and they don't care that they aren't leaving enough to live on. The laws need reformed...BUT they need to start forcing judges to quit picking and choosing when the rules apply before a reform in the laws will ever be effective.

Quoting savingtheworld:

Yea an they don't take the fathers cost of living n to consideration either..so she gets to remarry an receive cs




Quoting Cpdsptchgrl:

Here in CO. They only ask for the parent's income. Not the new spouses.





Quoting savingtheworld:

Where they do that at? I'm married, our money goes together..if any of the children need any thing we get it together..sure court dont c it like that...








Quoting Cpdsptchgrl:

It is not the legal responsibility of a step parent to provide ANY monetary support for the child. That's the one law I agree with in my state. Oh, and to clarify I am referring to CS only. PA it does get factored in.
Quoting savingtheworld:

Ok? She leaves with the new husband..its not like she has to pay all the bills her self? Dang thats 2000$ a month? An get Tenn care an food stamps?







Quoting Cpdsptchgrl:

In my state the new spouses income never comes into play, nor should it IMO.



Quoting savingtheworld:

He did..just went to court last month..he gets them 94 days out of the year? She makes 1200 a month an receives cs 800$ an welfare an tencare..an married?





















Quoting AngeLnChainZ:

If he wants more time? Fight for it!, it shouldn't matter what happened in the marriage, who caused or asked for the divorce.. and as for her getting more child support "when she feels like it" it doesn't work that way.

Quoting savingtheworld:

My husbands ex-wife left the marriage for another man.. an was pregnant..so I'm sure a big smack in the face for my husband, is it fair all he gets is every other weekend an a huge amount of child support? He didn't ask for a divorce, she did..she's able to get more child support when she feels like it.4 times in 2 yrs? Seems more like punishment






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erinsmom1964
by Gold Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 3:51 PM

No not all states do.  for example say you are married to a man who makes 75000 a year.  His child support to the first wife is figured off 75000.  Now say he pays 12000 a year to her.  when your turn comes up for child support you will get yours figured off 63000 a year and if he already has to have medical for those children he will get no credit for it with you as he already carries it whether your child needed it or not.  

Quoting comptonkids:

Actually it does matter

They take ALL kids into consideration
Not the bills though, which I think they should


Quoting chelsea1401:

My husband has a son from a previous relationship and he sends her 400 a month, which yes I know doesn't pay much for a kid these days... We get him every other weekend ( thats court ordered) she never packs him a bag with clothes, diapers or anything... so even though we send her all that money, were still having to buy him stuff he needs for here..  She also will drop him off on days when she has stuff to do or like when she went into labor we had him for a week and a half...  on another note she lives in gov't housing and on all kinds of welfare - so what she does with the money i dunno but I just dont think its fair... The courts are wanting to up his CS to over 600 if he keeps this 2nd job, It doesn't matter he has 2 other children at home to pay for on top of our bills...  It really pisses me off..


savingtheworld
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 4:17 PM
Yes that's exactly what I'm saying..the judge picks an chooses..an like u said the man with 2 jobs... Seriously last year my husband had 3 jobs just to make ends meet..he didn't complain he did what he had to do..an like u said he keeps finding loop holes! An u probably need the help! But u got those who take advantage of the ones that are gonna do the right thing


Quoting Cpdsptchgrl:

I think a lot of it depends on the judge. In CO cost of living is addressed in the formula and is SUPPOSED to be considered. However, they pick and choose when. My situation is a prime example. He's finding loop hole after loop hole not to work and getting low income adjustments and exemptions left and right. Yet, I have a friend busting his ass working 2 jobs and they don't care that they aren't leaving enough to live on. The laws need reformed...BUT they need to start forcing judges to quit picking and choosing when the rules apply before a reform in the laws will ever be effective.



Quoting savingtheworld:

Yea an they don't take the fathers cost of living n to consideration either..so she gets to remarry an receive cs






Quoting Cpdsptchgrl:

Here in CO. They only ask for the parent's income. Not the new spouses.







Quoting savingtheworld:

Where they do that at? I'm married, our money goes together..if any of the children need any thing we get it together..sure court dont c it like that...










Quoting Cpdsptchgrl:

It is not the legal responsibility of a step parent to provide ANY monetary support for the child. That's the one law I agree with in my state. Oh, and to clarify I am referring to CS only. PA it does get factored in.
Quoting savingtheworld:

Ok? She leaves with the new husband..its not like she has to pay all the bills her self? Dang thats 2000$ a month? An get Tenn care an food stamps?








Quoting Cpdsptchgrl:

In my state the new spouses income never comes into play, nor should it IMO.



Quoting savingtheworld:

He did..just went to court last month..he gets them 94 days out of the year? She makes 1200 a month an receives cs 800$ an welfare an tencare..an married?
























Quoting AngeLnChainZ:

If he wants more time? Fight for it!, it shouldn't matter what happened in the marriage, who caused or asked for the divorce.. and as for her getting more child support "when she feels like it" it doesn't work that way.

Quoting savingtheworld:

My husbands ex-wife left the marriage for another man.. an was pregnant..so I'm sure a big smack in the face for my husband, is it fair all he gets is every other weekend an a huge amount of child support? He didn't ask for a divorce, she did..she's able to get more child support when she feels like it.4 times in 2 yrs? Seems more like punishment







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pce68
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 4:28 PM

The underlined part, what do you mean by that? That if my child goes with the noncustodial parent, I shouldn't have to send clothes or food? Great idea but if I had followed that she probably would have worn the same clothes all weekend and had nothing she liked to eat, and heaven forbid she needed medicine, she sure wouldn't have gotten that!

Quoting HIJKLM:

I think they should update the enforcement for sure. My ex hasn't paid 1 cent in 3 years and they dont even care to look for him because I'm not on PA. My mother didn't pay anything in the 13years my brothers were minors. 6 years sine they turned 18 and she still hasn't paid anything.

I do think that sometimes the amount ordered is a burden on the noncustodial parent, especially if they have other children but it's usually less than half the child's needs.

*I also don't think the custodial parent should have to provide the child's needs while in the noncustodial parent's care.*


HIJKLM
by Bronze Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 5:50 PM
1 mom liked this
I don't think you should "have to" but in your case I understand why you do. I hear men say all the time "I pay CS so she should provide clothes, food, diapers, etc for my time too" I disagree. CS is not meant for all the child's needs, it's for dads half. His time with the kid(s) is taken into consideration in deciding what to pay. so you should not "have to"

Quoting pce68:

The underlined part, what do you mean by that? That if my child goes with the noncustodial parent, I shouldn't have to send clothes or food? Great idea but if I had followed that she probably would have worn the same clothes all weekend and had nothing she liked to eat, and heaven forbid she needed medicine, she sure wouldn't have gotten that!

Quoting HIJKLM:

I think they should update the enforcement for sure. My ex hasn't paid 1 cent in 3 years and they dont even care to look for him because I'm not on PA. My mother didn't pay anything in the 13years my brothers were minors. 6 years sine they turned 18 and she still hasn't paid anything.



I do think that sometimes the amount ordered is a burden on the noncustodial parent, especially if they have other children but it's usually less than half the child's needs.


*I also don't think the custodial parent should have to provide the child's needs while in the noncustodial parent's care.*


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birdiemom
by Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 5:53 PM
I don't know the laws. My x and I seperated almost 9 years ago. We never had any formal custody or support arrangements. We have a system that has made us this far, DD is almost 13.
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xoxRachelxox
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 5:54 PM

I do think they should be updated.

I know in my state, they will go after the paying parent for non payment only after they've missed a payment for 6 months straight. What I found my ex would do is make a payment on the 5 month mark so they couldn't take his license. It wasn't fair to me.

He now owes $20,000 in support and I don't think it should have ever gotten that high. Something should have been done sooner.

birdiemom
by Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 5:56 PM
I agree with you. I worked with a woman who said when they had the boyriend's daughter the mother wouldn't bring food or diapers, just clothes.
I always thought it was strange. I never sent food when my mom would watch my DD for me, lol.


Quoting HIJKLM:

I don't think you should "have to" but in your case I understand why you do. I hear men say all the time "I pay CS so she should provide clothes, food, diapers, etc for my time too" I disagree. CS is not meant for all the child's needs, it's for dads half. His time with the kid(s) is taken into consideration in deciding what to pay. so you should not "have to"



Quoting pce68:

The underlined part, what do you mean by that? That if my child goes with the noncustodial parent, I shouldn't have to send clothes or food? Great idea but if I had followed that she probably would have worn the same clothes all weekend and had nothing she liked to eat, and heaven forbid she needed medicine, she sure wouldn't have gotten that!

Quoting HIJKLM:

I think they should update the enforcement for sure. My ex hasn't paid 1 cent in 3 years and they dont even care to look for him because I'm not on PA. My mother didn't pay anything in the 13years my brothers were minors. 6 years sine they turned 18 and she still hasn't paid anything.





I do think that sometimes the amount ordered is a burden on the noncustodial parent, especially if they have other children but it's usually less than half the child's needs.



*I also don't think the custodial parent should have to provide the child's needs while in the noncustodial parent's care.*


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robyann
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:28 PM

 There's no law that can make an absent parent take care of their child if they don't want too. Sad, but true. The CS system is a mess, just like all the other systems set up to "help" families. There will always be parents who somehow get out of the whole child support thing. Then when they have other children it seems all the children suffer.

CoeyG
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:49 PM


Quoting savingtheworld:

Exactly!! U saying the man doesn't deserve to move on an b re married bc he has kids?


Quoting CoeyG:


Quoting chelsea1401:

My husband has a son from a previous relationship and he sends her 400 a month, which yes I know doesn't pay much for a kid these days... We get him every other weekend ( thats court ordered) she never packs him a bag with clothes, diapers or anything... so even though we send her all that money, were still having to buy him stuff he needs for here..  She also will drop him off on days when she has stuff to do or like when she went into labor we had him for a week and a half...  on another note she lives in gov't housing and on all kinds of welfare - so what she does with the money i dunno but I just dont think its fair... The courts are wanting to up his CS to over 600 if he keeps this 2nd job, It doesn't matter he has 2 other children at home to pay for on top of our bills...  It really pisses me off..

Gee imagine a father taking care of his child while the child's mother is giving brith, what is this world coming to?  Whether he paid child suypport or not you would still have to pay for clothing, diapers, food etc that he used in his father's home.  The money goes to pay for electricity, gas, water, sewer and garbage entertainment for the child, transportation (the child has to get to the doctor/daycare some way) as well as insurance for that transportation if she has a car.  Child support goes to pay for everything that touches that child's life.  You got involved with a guy who came with priorities and yes it is fair, first child comes first.  If you didn't want it to be that way you should not have become involved with him, yet you chose to do so.  It isn't his ex's or her child's fault that you chose to become involved with this guy.  


Is that what I said?  

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