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Weed on school grounds really? *update x2

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My 17yo dd was suspended from school. She told me they randomly check her and her friends at lunch while they were all talking and found a pipe and weed on one of the other kids so they all got suspended. Well according to the school official that called me. They were all standing in a circle passing the pipe on school grounds. Wtf on school grounds? Well I am totally outgrageously not happy about the smoking weed which I already knew about and have told her over and over not before or after school. Well now she is in drug & alcohol classes which I hope deture her away from it. She has been grounded durring her suspension working on all her missing assignments. What else can I do?



*guess I stated this wrong as Mommies are getting the wrong impression. No I do not allow her to do it. Yes I have gone over the side effects this has. I did find it in her room (under matress) and made her watch me put it down the garbage disposal. I check her room & backpack on a regular basis. I am afraid of complete control of forcing her every move on it that she will rebel.


* I called today and registered her in Youth 'n' action. I told her which day she would be going she told me she is not going. I said if I have to take you on the bus with me you are going. She said well I am bigger then you and you will have to take me physically by forceable action.


* I also called at risk youth. It told me to leave a message so I did.

* ok we have decided together to send her back to Arizona for the rest of her Junior year and the summer with my grandmother. She will attend school online. Then she will return back to me and continue her senior year online.
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by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 1:56 AM
Replies (11-20):
TinasTribe
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 9:28 AM

And to those nay sayers "Drugs are drugs"  etc... Do some research, real research not propaganda based research. Marijuana is not dangerous, it does not have life threatening side effects, no one ever the history of humans has OD'ed on marijuana. Marijuana is great for anxiety, has been known to cure cancers, and other aliments. It is a plant. It is safer than most of the food you eat. It is however, in most states, against the law. It is unfortunate but its true. This young lady is 17, not 12. She does not need punishment but guidance and her eyes opened up to the truth of the situation, she could go to jail for smoking weed. She needs to understand by breaking the law it can damage her future in may ways. It is her breaking the law that is the problem here. That should be the focus on the conversation the mother is have with her daughter.  I will admit though when my daughter was that age I was a snoop I would put her laundry away and as I did I would take notice to things.

atlmom2
by Ruby Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 9:35 AM
1 mom liked this
Illegal is illegal. Cigarettes are illegal under 18 also. You can get hooked on MJ too. Not like cigarettes, but the habit and the need for the high.


Quoting TinasTribe:

And to those nay sayers "Drugs are drugs"  etc... Do some research, real research not propaganda based research. Marijuana is not dangerous, it does not have life threatening side effects, no one ever the history of humans has OD'ed on marijuana. Marijuana is great for anxiety, has been known to cure cancers, and other aliments. It is a plant. It is safer than most of the food you eat. It is however, in most states, against the law. It is unfortunate but its true. This young lady is 17, not 12. She does not need punishment but guidance and her eyes opened up to the truth of the situation, she could go to jail for smoking weed. She needs to understand by breaking the law it can damage her future in may ways. It is her breaking the law that is the problem here. That should be the focus on the conversation the mother is have with her daughter.  I will admit though when my daughter was that age I was a snoop I would put her laundry away and as I did I would take notice to things.


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SlightlyPerfect
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Yesterday at 10:16 PM
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 9:38 AM
1 mom liked this

I would be handcuffing myself to her and walking around school with her. If she can't make good decisions, I'll be there to make them for her until she can.

slightlyperfect

TinasTribe
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 9:42 AM

We all have habits. Some of us are addicted to junk foods, Some of us are addicted to soda, etc. None of those things are healthy for us and can cause diseases. They can make us over weight, have diabites, heart disease, cancers, etc. But we keep eating them. Smoking weed does not cause any of those things. So its not a health issue or an addiction issue. It is a LEGAL issue. Her daughter could go to jail for smoking weed. It is the law and we should obey the law. Right? Because if we do not we go to jail. No one wants to go jail. It could really damage her daughter future.  I would also suggest keeping your daughter busy, idle hands are the devils play thing. If she is busy working in her community, with sports, having a part time job, those types of things it will give her less time with her pot smoking friends, it will give her less oppotunity to smoke weed or try other drugs, like drinking, and smoking cigarettes. Have a lot of time together as a family, plan things to do together.  If she doesn't have the oppotunity, then its not an issue. Keep that kid busy!

atlmom2
by Ruby Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 9:53 AM
Wow, that is how you justify pot smoking? Wow is all I say. Wait will we have half the US high all the time and a bunch of pot heads.


Quoting TinasTribe:

We all have habits. Some of us are addicted to junk foods, Some of us are addicted to soda, etc. None of those things are healthy for us and can cause diseases. They can make us over weight, have diabites, heart disease, cancers, etc. But we keep eating them. Smoking weed does not cause any of those things. So its not a health issue or an addiction issue. It is a LEGAL issue. Her daughter could go to jail for smoking weed. It is the law and we should obey the law. Right? Because if we do not we go to jail. No one wants to go jail. It could really damage her daughter future.  I would also suggest keeping your daughter busy, idle hands are the devils play thing. If she is busy working in her community, with sports, having a part time job, those types of things it will give her less time with her pot smoking friends, it will give her less oppotunity to smoke weed or try other drugs, like drinking, and smoking cigarettes. Have a lot of time together as a family, plan things to do together.  If she doesn't have the oppotunity, then its not an issue. Keep that kid busy!


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TinasTribe
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 10:04 AM

And you are assuming we do not now? I personally do not smoke weed, for the record, however I do not make assuptions about people who do, nor do I blurt out propaganda based information to people.  I would rather the truth be told and people are aware of facts.  And the fact is here she has a teenaged daughter, who needs more interesting, vital, and helpful things to do with her time rather than smoke weed with her friends. I would keep her out of trouble legally and probably bring them closer as a family.  I do not need to bash weed smokers, weed, or humliate a child to help a child do good things and stay out of trouble. 

la_bella_vita
by Gold Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 11:06 AM

You could start drug testing her and take away things until she is clean: computer, car, cell phone....whatever....there is always a way to help your children make the right choice. I was raised by a strict mother and well some of it was over the top I had no room to "mess" up.

Good luck

AnAngelsKiss
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 11:24 AM
I personally have not known anyone to be ADDICTED to weed. I was a huge pothead from the age of 14 to 28. I decided one day to stop and did. Everyone I have ever knowin to want to up and quit has with no feining for it like an addiction. I am addicted to ciggerettes and that is an addiction. I don't believe weed to be. Now if I get dd to stop smoking weed it would not be like her quitting um lets say a drug like meth or crack. Those are addictive.

Quoting atlmom2:

Illegal is illegal. Cigarettes are illegal under 18 also. You can get hooked on MJ too. Not like cigarettes, but the habit and the need for the high.




Quoting TinasTribe:

And to those nay sayers "Drugs are drugs"  etc... Do some research, real research not propaganda based research. Marijuana is not dangerous, it does not have life threatening side effects, no one ever the history of humans has OD'ed on marijuana. Marijuana is great for anxiety, has been known to cure cancers, and other aliments. It is a plant. It is safer than most of the food you eat. It is however, in most states, against the law. It is unfortunate but its true. This young lady is 17, not 12. She does not need punishment but guidance and her eyes opened up to the truth of the situation, she could go to jail for smoking weed. She needs to understand by breaking the law it can damage her future in may ways. It is her breaking the law that is the problem here. That should be the focus on the conversation the mother is have with her daughter.  I will admit though when my daughter was that age I was a snoop I would put her laundry away and as I did I would take notice to things.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
atlmom2
by Ruby Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 11:30 AM
It is not addicted to it like nicotine. Its addicted to the high. Search and find out.

Quoting AnAngelsKiss:

I personally have not known anyone to be ADDICTED to weed. I was a huge pothead from the age of 14 to 28. I decided one day to stop and did. Everyone I have ever knowin to want to up and quit has with no feining for it like an addiction. I am addicted to ciggerettes and that is an addiction. I don't believe weed to be. Now if I get dd to stop smoking weed it would not be like her quitting um lets say a drug like meth or crack. Those are addictive.

Quoting atlmom2:

Illegal is illegal. Cigarettes are illegal under 18 also. You can get hooked on MJ too. Not like cigarettes, but the habit and the need for the high.





Quoting TinasTribe:

And to those nay sayers "Drugs are drugs"  etc... Do some research, real research not propaganda based research. Marijuana is not dangerous, it does not have life threatening side effects, no one ever the history of humans has OD'ed on marijuana. Marijuana is great for anxiety, has been known to cure cancers, and other aliments. It is a plant. It is safer than most of the food you eat. It is however, in most states, against the law. It is unfortunate but its true. This young lady is 17, not 12. She does not need punishment but guidance and her eyes opened up to the truth of the situation, she could go to jail for smoking weed. She needs to understand by breaking the law it can damage her future in may ways. It is her breaking the law that is the problem here. That should be the focus on the conversation the mother is have with her daughter.  I will admit though when my daughter was that age I was a snoop I would put her laundry away and as I did I would take notice to things.





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CTSBrandy
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 11:42 AM

It isn't the boundaries that cause a child to rebel. It's a lack of trust in why you're setting those boundaries.  If you sit in a high school cafeteria, you'll hear kids discussing their parents behavior, decisions, statements, and rules at nearly every table. The saddest voices are those kids who say, "Not me. My parents don't care what I do." Boundaries show your kids that you care, and yes - that's even when you're fighting over them.

Your daughter got involved in smoking pot but you still haven't asked yourself the biggest question that I would be right now - why? Why did she start doing something she knows you don't approve of her doing? Is it because she's seen you do it and figures that if it's good enough for you, it's good enough for her?  Is it that she's trying to escape whatever pain she might be in emotionally? Is it that she feels like this is what she has to do to fit in with the only group of kids she feels accepts her as she is?  Try to figure out WHY she's smoking and you'll have the key to understanding what you need to do to stop her from doing it.

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