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Advice for Moms Advice for Moms

How to get out of a relationship when you aren't financially stable?

Posted by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 5:18 PM
  • 11 Replies
I have a car and an apartment I pay for while bf pays for insurance and other stuff that I can't afford. I want to leave him so badly but I just lost my job to make matters worse. Neither of us has friends or family as were new to the state. I know I can't afford all the necessary bills I have on my own but I can't stand living like this.
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by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 5:18 PM
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Replies (1-10):
CreziaMommyTo2
by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 5:25 PM

hes your BF for godssake.. walk out.. 

stargazerwolf
by Bronze Member on Nov. 18, 2012 at 5:44 PM

Look in to state help, I'm assuming you have a kid or kids since you are on a mom forum? The state will help mothers especially since you aren't married. If it's your apartment then kick him out and the state can help you pay rent, utilities etc until you can get a job and back on your feet. When I left my now ex husband I had no job, no driver's license, nothing at all, I moved in with my mom, got some state help, got what they call Aid to Dependent Children which pays you a certain amount every month for doing job searching, resume preping etc at Workforce Development. If you do this job searching and stuff, they will even reemberse you for gas to go to job interviews (if its any distance). The stat will even help pay day care. You can even get food stamps. There is a lot of state help out there, it just takes some work to get it (which it should or everyone would get it). Good luck!

CoeyG
by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 7:21 PM

So are you on the lease?  How long is the lease for?  If you are on the lease then you would have to discuss this with your landlord because you would be breaking the lease if you left and the landlor can sue you for the rent after you move out.  Also if you want to leave, can't you go back to the state you came from?  Move in with friends or family there, if you can't afford to pay them draw up a contract where you do all the housework /watch their kids for free while they work.  

robyann
by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 9:31 PM

 Yea I was thinking like CoeyG, get up just enough money to get you back to your home state. Call friends and family and find out who can let you stay. It's not impossible, if you want to leave then you can find a way.

How many kids do you have?

typingMom to 6~MawMaw to 9 & counting!

Randomlady
by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 9:40 PM
I was actually just standing in as a stepmom and came on here for advice for the boy.
I am not from America so it is very hard for me, though I am American.
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CoeyG
by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 9:49 PM


Quoting Randomlady:

I was actually just standing in as a stepmom and came on here for advice for the boy.
I am not from America so it is very hard for me, though I am American.

Why did you move in with this man that you just now decided that you didn't like to begin with?  Maybe you should have gotten to know him better?

Randomlady
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 6:32 PM
I knew him a year before living with him now for two years. I was completely smitten with him at first as it always goes.
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CoeyG
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 6:53 PM


Quoting Randomlady:

I knew him a year before living with him now for two years. I was completely smitten with him at first as it always goes.

You must not have known him very well then.  Knowing him for a year doesn't mean you know him well.  You knew his good side but didn't know him in the harsh light of reality.  It took three years to know the real him...Like I said...why would you move in with someone you obviously really didn't know. 

emmy526
by Silver Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:05 PM

look into a live in job doing housework or nanny...

PinkParadox
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:21 PM
The past can't be changed. Pointing out a mistake can be helpful, so that it is not repeated. Dwelling on it changes nothing. You fix bad desicions the best you can, and move forward. Period.

Get a new job, where ever you can. Get two if you have to. Advertise for a room mate, try for state assistance etc. If you want to di something, take the steps to do it....that is all. The only person that can change your life, is you.


Quoting CoeyG:


Quoting Randomlady:

I knew him a year before living with him now for two years. I was completely smitten with him at first as it always goes.

You must not have known him very well then.  Knowing him for a year doesn't mean you know him well.  You knew his good side but didn't know him in the harsh light of reality.  It took three years to know the real him...Like I said...why would you move in with someone you obviously really didn't know. 

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