i told my husband............

Then the next question is will he change, do you think talking with someone would help your marriage improve? If so by all means try, a marriage is suppose to be hard but there is also suppose to be two people making an effort. And I know how you feel , everyone though I had the perfect marriage,  a loving husband, a husband that financially kept me living well, he was polite and genuinely a nice man. But his priority was always work, he was gone most of the year, I probably saw him three or four times when he wasn't away on business. I was literally in a marriage with myself most of the time, what was the point in being married. I knew when I asked for a divorce that there was nothing I could do to make him change, it had to come from him and he didn't want too but even like that filing for divorce was hard.

Quoting ceo-mom:

wow eye opening. truthfully i can definitely forgive him of everything that he had don to me in the past because i know that i married a human being and that he would not be perfect. All i ask for is to make me feel love the way he talk to other people nice and gentle he does not talk to me that way and people form the outside think that i have it all and they don't know shit. he can be a doll to other's and a bitch to me.

Quoting victoriahearts:

Before you do anything  ask yourself this, is everything he has done to you forgivable ? Meaning if he were to try to make changes could you forgive and forget or would the way he treated you before and the cheating still upset you? If you can't forgive and move forward the only thing is divorce if you can then get some help, M.C. for sure, and there are places that offer free marriage consultation. As for your finances you have to sit down, take all the bills that are important like rent and so on and make a budget and stick to it, it's very easy for money to go out the door if you don't have a budget and if you find you are spending more then you make, you have to choose what to cut down on. I make a budget at the beginning of each year for the entire year, I put in my fixed income, fixed bill and what I would like to put away in savings, this way I know what months I can offer to spend more or what months everything goes to bills. Best of luck, I know asking for a divorce and going through one it's hard, I been there.

Quoting ceo-mom:

wowwwwww thanks that really hits home CoeyG. i am seing a therapist alone but i do not find her to be that helpfull because all we talke about is my school and that's that.

Quoting CoeyG:

No one else is responsible for making you happy.  Happiness comes from within so it is up to you to look inside yourself to find the happiness within yourself rather than expecting your husand  and fanmily to make you happy.  If you are having issues then maye you should seek therapy.  Because if you continue to exect somoone else to make you happy you will forever be unhappy.

Then talk about something else or find another therapist

So sorry you have such a hard work – kudos to you. While you wait for others to respond, here are a few things we have found make a great “date night” on a budget. I’ll suggest inexpensive dates such cooking dinner at home together, and just go out for dessert. Or, pack a picnic of different things such brisket, sausage and buttery rolls – he may just enjoy this. You can also plan an outdoor activity -- check your local visitors bureau for ideas and deals. Prayed for you!

I don't think you are losing your mind. Before you make any life-changing decisions, would you please get checked out medically. If you are anemic or have thyroid issues, for example, it can make you see things through a haze of exhaustion. Also, counseling may be called for, he doesn't seem to realize that he is not doing as he should, even though you told him.