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Am I in the wrong here???

Posted by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 5:02 PM
  • 15 Replies

This is not a circumcision debate.


We decided not to circumcise our baby boy. My husband and I.

My mother-in-law initially stated that she agreed and "trusted our decision". Well, we had her babysit and she changed him. The monday after she sent me a text and said that she had talked to a nurse practitioner and the NP said it was better for them to be cirumcised, which is not accurate at all. Well she TOLD me to talk to the pediatrition and I TOLD her to mind her own business.

She didn't like that very much.

She didn't come over all week and then she called my brother-in-law today upset that we didn't invite her over (did 3 times)!!!!!!!

She tells me that "I'm alienating people who love Kolten"

She's alienating herself and causing conflict.

I told her I'm not sorry for what I said, "she over stepped and I'd tell her to mind her own again and will probably. This is my husbands and mine and family and we will make the medical decisions for our son alone." I guess that was rude? How do you not be rude by trying to clearly establish boundaries???

She didn't like that.

According to her our conversation was "not successful"

Am I in the wrong here?????

by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 5:02 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Bleacheddecay
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 5:04 PM

No. It doesn't sound like you are in the wrong to me at all. *HUGS* Don't let her drama get you down.

gblossom
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 5:05 PM
1 mom liked this

No you are not <3 He is your son - you and your husband are on the same page and that is all that matters! 

smurfy88
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 5:07 PM
Nope
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Momma2013
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 5:10 PM
1 mom liked this

It IS your decision a decision that you and your husband made ALONE for a reason, it's nobody else's business and they shouldn't say anything about it.

You are NOT in the wrong and she obviously over stepped her boundaries making it necessary that you clearly lay them down again. If you don't establish boundaries from the beginning, it'll be harder later on. Good job being parents and doing what you believe is right!

caro100
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 5:11 PM

MIL's sometimes think they have more experience.  Have you had difficulties with her before...( think Everybody loves Raymond)?  You should just remain calm and serene, and if BIL confronts you say, I'm sorry, she's dragging you into this, she has been invited, she is choosing not to come, sorry for the misinformation.  Chances are he's been on the other end of the information miscommunication himself.  I would not ask her to babysit or do any "favors", she would just run those times out as ammunition for later.  If she wants to have the child over when he gets older, let her but it has to be her idea.

x_Starr_x
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 5:42 PM
1 mom liked this
theres no way about it my parents still do the same thing well try too the otherday there was a tift about my oldesst hes 10 i got sick of it and yelled " well if he came outta your twat I guess you would get a say so my child my decisions" ive been battling this for years parents always butting in
gblossom
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 6:03 PM

haha good for you girlfriend! My husbands family, excpecially his dad and aunts always try to but in and say this and that. Try and go above what we say and make us the bad guys .. they even told us (we don't let our daughter eat junk or drink soda, she's only 15 months, 8 months at the time) that they can do whatever they want, including feeding our daughter whatever because they raised my husband. I calmly asked ' A raise of hands here, Who in this room got stiches in their biscuit giving birth to Amora? Anyone?' - Of course no one said a single thing. They got the hint and they have yet to try anything of the sort since then! 

Quoting x_Starr_x:

theres no way about it my parents still do the same thing well try too the otherday there was a tift about my oldesst hes 10 i got sick of it and yelled " well if he came outta your twat I guess you would get a say so my child my decisions" ive been battling this for years parents always butting in


x_Starr_x
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 6:16 PM
1 mom liked this
ha sometime u have to embarrass the piss. outta them and make THEM feel uncomfortable.


Quoting gblossom:

haha good for you girlfriend! My husbands family, excpecially his dad and aunts always try to but in and say this and that. Try and go above what we say and make us the bad guys .. they even told us (we don't let our daughter eat junk or drink soda, she's only 15 months, 8 months at the time) that they can do whatever they want, including feeding our daughter whatever because they raised my husband. I calmly asked ' A raise of hands here, Who in this room got stiches in their biscuit giving birth to Amora? Anyone?' - Of course no one said a single thing. They got the hint and they have yet to try anything of the sort since then! 


Quoting x_Starr_x:

theres no way about it my parents still do the same thing well try too the otherday there was a tift about my oldesst hes 10 i got sick of it and yelled " well if he came outta your twat I guess you would get a say so my child my decisions" ive been battling this for years parents always butting in



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CoeyG
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 7:16 PM

This is your child and your decisions regarding anything to do with his body until he is of age is your responsibility If you choose to not have him "snipped"  then that is your choice, not the choice of his grandmother, aunts, uncles or cousins, not the choice greatgrandparents, or other family members, not the choice of his siblings if any...only his parents and you have made your decisions telling her to mind her own business is not wrong.

AubreeGrace17
by Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 8:48 PM
No, even if she disagrees with your choices she shouldn't overstep boundaries like that.
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