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Did I blow it on this one? How to respond?

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Backstory: I have a profile on a dating website & this guy clicked the "yes" button on the "meet me" feature. I checked him out & sent him a message. He replied that he was in FL (I'min OH) on vacation but would be home Sunday. Said I could text him if I wanted. My "rule" is to not give my number out to just anyone & everyone & he claimed to have understood.

So I just messaged him asking how his trip back was & asked what he was in school for. This was his reply:

yes, IT.....its a program designed to lead from entry level certifications into more advanced as I get further into the program...depending on my interest level as things advance... thanks for asking. I'm glad you had a fun time with your church. I'm getting the sense you're wanting more of a friendship...which is ok..just letting you know I'm not much of a "lets just chat on the computer" kinda guy... no offense...if thats your level of comfort...I wish you the best...but I am not wanting a pen pal....true friendship in person...sure.... possible dating things down the road... thats fine too but in person.../ or even phone then meet in person...but I dont want a purely computer thing....sorry. 

So now I feel like I blew my chance with him! I am NOT looking for just friends. I am looking for possible dating. But I don't feel like I should give my number out to everyone I talk to! I've had a friend do that & she ended up getting crazy calls & texts at all times of the day & night from one guy who wouldn't leave her alone!

HELP!

by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 9:19 PM
Replies (11-20):
rayroe2
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:00 PM

Just say well I understand, I want to meet people in person too but I am just not going to give my number out to anybody I would like to know something about you first.

jesusgirl76
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 10:05 PM
Just tell him how you feel and go from there. I wish you the best.
Elijasmommy2012
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 10:20 PM
I think that if he can't understand or respect your wishes then maybe he's not the one or maybe he's not intrested and that was a cop out....I wouldn't stress over it. Maybe you can get his # and call him private or something if really intrested good luck!
butterflycircle
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 10:59 PM

It is a dating web site and he was out of state, I wouldn't have given my number out either. I would explain to him that you also want more than a pen pal, however you would like to know who you are giving your number to b/c you never know. 

If this e-mail he sent you makes you think that he is kind of rude (for lack of a better word) for not wanting to e-mail a few times before making a judgement, let him go and don't think twice. Mr. Right is out there. 

stargaze281
by Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 11:47 PM

Hi. You decide to be in a dating site but you dont want him to text you? I dont know, you sound very afraid or cautious. The question is, are you attracted to him? if you are, i dont think its such a terrible thing to talk on the phone. But, of course you shouldnt completely trust him, but you have to take chances. Try telling him what you think or feel, be honest.

raegan1221
by Bronze Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 11:51 PM

 I'd just explain to him that you prefer to chat on the computer a couple more times, then gradually lead up to text/phone then in person because now days you can never be too careful.  If he is going to blow you off because you're sticking by your values and how you feel on safety issues, then he isn't the one for you friend or more.

stephs5isenough
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by Member on Jan. 4, 2013 at 12:02 AM

 You need to keep your rule and the guy should understand that.  You definitely need more time to leatn more about one another.  It sounds like you might should let this guy go.  Remember, don't rush it.  God's timing is more perfect than ours.  Wait for somone who will get to know you better first and allow you to be comfortable too.  Good Luck Dawn.


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TranquilMind
by Member on Jan. 4, 2013 at 12:46 AM

Yes.  He's already told you that he views things differently and is in an incredible rush.  Maybe you dodged a bullet here.

Quoting PerfectVirgo:

I would not be emailing him back. If he can't exchange 3 emails without meeting you, or getting your number, something's wrong with him.


Jazmyn1
by Member on Jan. 4, 2013 at 1:19 AM
Unless she blocks every text ,which I think u get charged for, he will get her number when she texts back


Quoting swthrt737:



I understand your pnt and i think getting to know him more is better,btw,why not him giving you his?


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girlywifey
by on Jan. 4, 2013 at 1:47 AM


Quoting PerfectVirgo:

I would not be emailing him back. If he can't exchange 3 emails without meeting you, or getting your number, something's wrong with him.


This. It sounds like a head game to me. I would move on.

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