Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Advice for Moms Advice for Moms

Question for one that co-sleep?

Posted by   + Show Post

I have two kids and have never co-slept. But I have a friend that sleeps with her 3 1/2 year old daughter and her hubby sleeps in their 8 year old sons room. They started this when she had the 3 1/2 year old. They have had some really bad marital problems since then. And I got to wondering for those that co-sleep, when do you have sex? Because I know that has been one of the issues with my friends marriage. Not trying to cause a debate or anything but just wondering when you find time for intimacy wether it be snuggling, kissing or sex. 

by on Jan. 7, 2013 at 12:58 PM
Replies (11-19):
Dvegas
by on Jan. 7, 2013 at 4:42 PM


Quoting piwife:

By the way its not bedsharing the causes the problem is lack of trying... 3 kids here have bedshare with all of them. Me and dh we hug, cuddle and spend time together. Sex, hugs, kisses and cuddles are not limited to the bedroom..

Well I am glad you were able to make it work for you but for us even with only one kid it didn't work out not because of lack of trying but because my lil guy is a super light sleeper. He woke up every 1-2 hours and whenever i left the room to try and spend time with my husband he would wake up within 5 minutes of me leaving. He then would only go back to sleep if he was holding my arm which yes was cute but obviously i wasn't able to leave again. We also have no family or friends who are able to babysit for us so we are on are own here.

as of two weeks ago he is now in his own room sleeping through the night (12 hrs straight) and my husband and i are back in the same bed also sleeping better. We are all getting the sleep that we need and my husband and i are getting alone time again. So although I am not against co sleeping I have realized that it doesnt work for everyone.

mammabear413
by on Jan. 7, 2013 at 4:45 PM
We have sex when our son sleeps. We have the whole house couch the guest from the kitchen. Shower lol hasn't really affected ours. My son is 21 months we just started to get him out. Both my df and I sleep with our son no separate rooms like that
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
piwife
by on Jan. 7, 2013 at 4:46 PM
I have 3 kids non of them sleep thru the night. .... you said your baby woke up every 1-2 hrs.. mine did too. yet I found the time. Of course bedsharing doesn't work for everyone but its not to blame for marriages gone south


Quoting Dvegas:



Quoting piwife:

By the way its not bedsharing the causes the problem is lack of trying... 3 kids here have bedshare with all of them. Me and dh we hug, cuddle and spend time together. Sex, hugs, kisses and cuddles are not limited to the bedroom..

Well I am glad you were able to make it work for you but for us even with only one kid it didn't work out not because of lack of trying but because my lil guy is a super light sleeper. He woke up every 1-2 hours and whenever i left the room to try and spend time with my husband he would wake up within 5 minutes of me leaving. He then would only go back to sleep if he was holding my arm which yes was cute but obviously i wasn't able to leave again. We also have no family or friends who are able to babysit for us so we are on are own here.


as of two weeks ago he is now in his own room sleeping through the night (12 hrs straight) and my husband and i are back in the same bed also sleeping better. We are all getting the sleep that we need and my husband and i are getting alone time again. So although I am not against co sleeping I have realized that it doesnt work for everyone.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Kitschy
by on Jan. 7, 2013 at 4:48 PM

We only co sleep for the first 9 months, and sex is sparse in that time anyway. lol

Mommy2justone
by Mommy2justtwo on Jan. 7, 2013 at 4:48 PM

My daughter goes to sleep in her own bed and comes into our bed in the middle of the night. So we just make love when we first go to bed :) She used to sleep with us all night when she was a baby. We would usually wait until she was out, put her in the bassinet and get to it. She was an infant, so it didn't matter....kind of made it more fun trying to be quiet, lol! 

Susan0805
by Bronze Member on Jan. 7, 2013 at 4:50 PM
My kids start in their bed and then end up in ours. We either have sex in our room after the kids first fall asleep or we get out of or bed and find another empty room. It's not rocket science. We have a three bedroom two bathroom house, there is always a place.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Dvegas
by on Jan. 7, 2013 at 4:58 PM

Well I guess some of you on here are just perfect and can make anything work. GOOD FOR YOU! don'tput down other peoples marriages and tell them they just aren't trying hard enough when you know nothing about them. All you know is  a small post they put on this site and then there you go making assumptions. its fine if you want to give advice as this is what this group is about but there is no need to get all high and mighty.

Dvegas
by on Jan. 7, 2013 at 5:08 PM


Quoting piwife:

So you guys had zero sex in 13 mts?


Quoting Dvegas:

My husband and i have a 13 month old and I have been co sleeping with him up until two weeks ago. During the past 13months me and my husband did not have time alone  to chat let alone have sex. I was one of those moms who want to put the needs of her child first and that means letting them wean from co sleeping on there own and telling my husband to just deal with it this is what happens when you have a child. unfortunately it took a toll on our marriage and we argued all the time.  We finally were able to get our baby into his own crib which has helped our marriage tremendously.  I now know what was best for our marriage was to stop co sleeping and to make our marriage my first priority and in turn with us having a strong marriage we will be able to provide our child with a happy home instead of one with his parent bickering all the time.



We got lucky a few times and he stayed  asleep longer than 5 minutes after first putting him down for the night but usually he woke up after 5 minutes after putting him to bed and then he would have to hold on to me the rest of the night. he would then still wake up to nurse every 1-2 hrs and would go back to sleep holding me so i couldnt leave the bed or i would wake him up again.  

Bek22
by on Jan. 7, 2013 at 8:49 PM
We shower together every single morning.
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN