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Advice for Moms Advice for Moms

young mom need some advice on life

Posted by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 6:53 PM
  • 17 Replies

hello im Erin i have 2 daughters a 3 yr old and 18 month old, well im currently having some issuses  i am 21 with now job, no driving  licences no ged, ive been married since 2009 recently split up august 2011 i jumped into another relationship  shortly after he is amazing i havent had to work in about 4 years ive been a stay at home mom until recently, im trying to get my life together, but i have no help i dont even know where  to began i feels like im never going to get out of this hole, i currently have 2 tickets im trying to pay off there not major tickets but thet are holding me back from getting my licences but i cant get my ged due to baby sitting problems and lack of money which my ged is holding me back from getting a good job, am i the only one who got myself in this mess so deep im sick of living day by day wasting all my time away i just  need some advice some guidance some support, am i the only one in this world who has screwed her whole entire life up,  dont get me wrong my kids have everything they need and want and great parents but i need to better my life for them just feels like im stuck in a whole and cant get out

by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 6:53 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MrsApple
by Bronze Member on Jan. 11, 2013 at 6:59 PM
Take it step by step.First start off by paying off your tickets.One at a time if needed.Then get your license.Do you have family or friends that can help with babysitting so that you can work,even just part time?Your husband/ex?Work at night so he can keep them for you?Then start on your GED once you have work/babysitters worked out.Again,just take it a step at a time.
emmy526
by Silver Member on Jan. 11, 2013 at 7:02 PM

if your bfr is that amazing, why isn't he helping you?

and you havent worked since you were 17?  You have basically no job experiene either,,.tell your bf you ned help to better yourself, and if he can't help you, then he's not much of anything

Quote:

ive been married since 2009 recently  split up august 2011 i jumped into another relationship  shortly after he is amazing i havent had to work in about 4 years

frndlyfn
by Platinum Member on Jan. 11, 2013 at 7:20 PM

I agree by getting the tickets paid off so you can get a license.  Find out about financial aid to help get your ged.  There may be a grant or initiative out there for this purpose.

GOBryan
by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 7:33 PM

No, there's plenty of teens in your position. It's going to be hard but you're going to need to pick a priority and find a solution for babysitting so that you can, little by little, get it together. 

I would say that a drivers license is first and then your GED. That way you can drive to your classes legally. 

I would tell you to look in your local community, there's probably support groups where you can find other women like you. You can find a friend and then you can help eachother out. 

I'm not sure where you are but there's a website called meetup.com... not meetme but meet up... There you may be able to find groups in your area of different kinds from friendship to networking. 

elephantmamaof2
by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 7:37 PM
Good advice here. Day by day little by little. Set each goal individually so it doesn't seem so overwhelming. Best of luck mama!


Quoting MrsApple:

Take it step by step.First start off by paying off your tickets.One at a time if needed.Then get your license.Do you have family or friends that can help with babysitting so that you can work,even just part time?Your husband/ex?Work at night so he can keep them for you?Then start on your GED once you have work/babysitters worked out.Again,just take it a step at a time.

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mumbellina
by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 7:41 PM

If you haven't already I think the place to start is deciding what you want. It's not enough to want something better. It helps to know what you're working toward. Without knowing that though it seems like you could use a wider support network. Maybe you could look into a local mom's group. It could be a way to make some friends and maybe even arrange some childcare swaps so that you could attend classes or work.

chercaruso
by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 7:51 PM

 My absolute favorite site for staying motivated and focusing on what matters and not making life harder than it already is - http://www.marcandangel.com/.  Go there.  Be inspired.  Make a plan.  Take a deep breathe.  Then....BEGIN.

And lucky you - today's post was 10 Ways to Make Life Good Again.

tinkerin77
by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 7:54 PM

my boyfriend is helping me  but he cant help me pay off all my tickets im trying to pay them off as i go but my Family and i are not on good terms and ive had several jobs since i was 17 but couldnt work them each longer then a week or two due to my kids getting sick or myself  and my ex lives 6 hours away so he isnt really around to help so i pretty much only have my kids and boyfriend so i feel like i have to do it all by myself

coreynlala
by Member on Jan. 11, 2013 at 8:03 PM
1 mom liked this

Every one has great advise. If he really is that great and can be trusted with your kids then see if, say he works during the day, maybe there are night GED classes or weekend classes in your area. Or even online classes. I know we have them here. 

If you have no friends or fam to watch kids then check out local day care centers. I used to work in one and I've been a child care provider for years. In my own personal experience, there's less likely to be any abuse in a daycare because of the amount of potential witnesses. (not trying to scare you but I know that's the reason many wont use one) An in-home sitter is a bit more risky. Either way... And I know some people are going to have a problem with this part... Most states have services that will help you pay for childcare. The same place you'd get your food stamps usually. Don't let anybody make you feel bad if you do. It's only bad if you are not trying to better yourself. You don't have to use these services for eve just til you get on your feet.

Stay strong sweetie. Good for for recognizing what you need to do. Now just take it step by step. You CAN do this... :) good luck

mamavalor
by Member on Jan. 11, 2013 at 8:09 PM

Find a church you are comfortable attending.  There are many people there more than willing to help with babysitting, tutoring/studying, financial aid, and overall getting your life back together again.  No worries.  Have hope and be strong for your daughters!

 

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