Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Father in law calls my 1 year olds clothes "sexy" right to her.

Posted by   + Show Post

I get so disgusted when my Father in law telsl my daughter "Oh you've got some sexy shoes on" or "Oh look at you in your sexy shirt. She's one. I keep telling my husband to say something but I'm fed up. I'm not comfortable with that or his insistance on changing her and saying she doesn't need clothes on and should run a round nude for a little bit everyday. When I try to rock her to sleep and shes just still, and her eyes are getting heavy he'll just grab and paw at her and say "you stinker. You're not sleepy". No matter how long the visit whie he's talking he'll just stare at me holding her longingly. Anytime I have her he's hovering going "here I got her. You go, I got her. His wife will make him dinner and he gets angry with her.. "damnit, I'm holding baby. Can't you see that?! I'm not hungry". Then when he's holding her he'll sit there and tell me what she likes, and finds funny, and things she doesn't like. When she was newborn he tried showing me how to correctly breastfeed. I'm so grossed out by this man. His wife works at a daycare and he goes there on his lunchbreak and plays with all the babies. I need a hula hoop rule with man that cusses like a sailor btw. He needs to relax, fo-real because I'm about to rip my hair out or ban him from ever babysitting. I just can't trust a man that will refer to baby girl as sexy. Am I over reacting?

by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 5:16 PM
Replies (31-40):
Nikkijr
by Member on Jan. 16, 2013 at 11:56 PM
1 mom liked this
I would calm down and relax. I agree that people shouldn't refer to anything on children as sexy. I would reply thank you her shoes are CUTE. Every time anything is sexy I would repeat with the word cute. I would even go as far to say. . You mean cute right cuz babies arent sexy in the least. Say this with a smile of course. The rest I would do as I am sure you are. Take her into other room to change. Etc. But you do come off as a baby hog. Hey I was with my first. .. trust me lol. It made my own folks frustrated. After all she is my baby. I wouldn't dwell on creeper feelings after all those are your DH parents. They probably always wanted a girl and always wished they had one. Now they do but its better cause they are grandparents. And as far as parents go they do not listen to you. My folks give soda and chocolate to my kids all day long getting them wired up no matter how many times I ask them not to. Get used to it.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Nikkijr
by Member on Jan. 16, 2013 at 11:58 PM
They are just keeping the obnoxious grandparent rule: spoil them and send them home...
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Madammeke
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 8:23 AM
Talk about the language.

Grandparents overstep boundaries out of love and eagerness to help, let them.
After all she is your daughter you have her all the time.

Do not let them alone with her until you feel comfortable. If that is never that is fine too.




Quoting MarlaMet:

Well, i have to get to her quick enough If i plan on feeding her. While She has her plate of food he picks at his plate and feeds her stuff leaving the plate in front of her untouched. I mean, with everything he feels a strong need to do everything that I would normally do. Even feeding her. That'as definately the over excited grandpa that misses having his kids as babies. They just clash with me. He and his wife also forget to refer to each other as grandma and grandpa. She'll hand my daughter to my FIL and say "Here go by daddy" and MIL will chase my baby going "mama's going to get you". I corrected this numerous times which leads to eyerolling. Because of course I'm the weird one. On her Birthday i was feeding her carrots and hot dogs and she sat on the other side and fed her at the same time I was. Our hands would even hit and she'd go "oh woops! You go first". It's overwhelming and I can't stand having them around. To say the least. lol I'm so glad I'm the only one that would be uncomfortable. They and my husband make me feel irrational all the time.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Sirennea
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 8:41 AM
4 moms liked this
People have intuitions for a reason. Though not always.spot on I would by no means calm down or relax. Something's amiss here.

As for not listening, don't get used to it. This is YOUR CHILD not theirs. Calling mama and daddy, giving things to her you don't want them to is unacceptable behavior.

My parents helped with childcare when my son was your daughters age and cut his hair, gave him pop and candy, and tried to get him to call them da and ma along with other behaviors I found annoying.

I found other childcare and refused then visits until they agreed to adhere to MY CHILDs rules.

Screw waiting for your pussy of a husband, put your foot down with these people now before she gets any older!


Quoting Nikkijr:

I would calm down and relax. I agree that people shouldn't refer to anything on children as sexy. I would reply thank you her shoes are CUTE. Every time anything is sexy I would repeat with the word cute. I would even go as far to say. . You mean cute right cuz babies arent sexy in the least. Say this with a smile of course. The rest I would do as I am sure you are. Take her into other room to change. Etc. But you do come off as a baby hog. Hey I was with my first. .. trust me lol. It made my own folks frustrated. After all she is my baby. I wouldn't dwell on creeper feelings after all those are your DH parents. They probably always wanted a girl and always wished they had one. Now they do but its better cause they are grandparents. And as far as parents go they do not listen to you. My folks give soda and chocolate to my kids all day long getting them wired up no matter how many times I ask them not to. Get used to it.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
whoodathunk
by Bronze Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 9:17 AM

Trust your instincts and have your husband talk with him!

MaddiesMama09
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 9:18 AM
1 mom liked this
Two words: ridiculously inappropriate.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
skittlebeans88
by Bronze Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 9:22 AM
I would never let him babysit.. ever. Very creepy!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
skittlebeans88
by Bronze Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 9:24 AM
Why does your husband refuse to speak to his father about it?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
hkcason
by Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 9:30 AM

no that's uber creepy. i would never say a child is sexy, thats inappropriate especially if that child is related to me. EWW

January1964
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 9:32 AM
1 mom liked this

He definitely sounds weird. Saying she needs to run around nude? Tries to wake her up? I have never seen a grandparent this interested in a baby, ever. In fact, my FIL is more interested in his dog than my child!! The part where he was showing you how to breastfeed is beyond weird. He cannot be left alone with your child. I am not saying he would do anything to her, but he sounds weird, trust your gut.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)



Featured