Mom cant enjoy motherhood because of selfish husband??????

Do what I'm doing and go on strike. I absolutely refuse to do anything other then dishes right now. I have told myself that no matter how bad it gets I will not clean anything for a month or until people learn to appreciate everything I do.

Tell him how you feel then tell him your taking the day off and the laundry needs to be done, house cleaned, and son needs a bath. Then go have you a you day.

Oh, I have tried all of the above, no reaction at all!  He rather live dirty, even been known to pull dirty laundry out of the hamper for work and throw it in the dryer to freshen up.  Im really at my witts end, he notices NOTHING. He feels like because he works and gets payed for it, that hes the only one important in the house.

 

The only way to get him to see any of it, is to leave him alone with your son. Even then, he will justify this experience as being more difficult for him because he's a guy and it's easier for women. Which may be, but at least he will gain a little empathy.

Personally I kept expecting my whole life that my husband would see through to be fair and all, but even though he's a kind and loving person, never could see it and therefore it was never fair. My expectations have caused me grief and resentment.

I am still in the process of reminding myself just to not expect so much of a man. I mean, I expect fidelity and devotion , which I get. I expect kindness and love which I get. But there's just so much men are able to give. I think we should get them to do as much as they are able and willing, but know that there's a point where that understanding just drops off like the edge of a cliff. They aren't being mean or selfish as much as just unintentionally ignorant.

Just focus on child and feeding yourself and the child.  If husband wants to go to work dirty and gross, that is his decision.  He is an adult.   I have been lucky that we both put in work for the household as well as dd.  She is 6 so in homework I help with reading and writing whereas he helps with science and math.  Teamwork is very important in a marriage as well as parenthood.

How do you know he doesn't notice?  If it's because he doesn't acknowledge it, it doesn't mean he doesn't notice, do you tell him everyday how hard he works and what a great job he's doing? Kwim? You notice and appreciate it but don't necessarily commend him every day for it.  Maybe do a little something out of the ordinary one night, like a candle lit dinner after DS goes to bed?  Sounds like you're both just in a routine, maybe spice it up a little.  Good luck! 

 I've got nothing.

I'm so thankful to stay home that I could careless if he spouts off meaningless words....I know how hard I work......and so does he.

I don't need to hear it.....to know it.

Hi,

this may sound harsh but ask him if he wants a family. When you have a family you give up the "I" for us. He needs to realize that he isn't single( which is kinda the way he is acting). I have been through ALOT with my baby daddy trying to make it work and all. Once we had our son it took him 2 1/2 yrs to  realize this among other things. Guys just somehow are slower in this process and you really have to spell it out for them. Again I know what I'm saying is kinda brutal but you cannot be happy in this situation and therefore cannot be the best mom to your child because he is making you feel unhappy, ready to rip your hair out, and at the end of your rope! He needs to choose and see that you are serious and not joking or wasting your time anymore!  Good luck!

There is this thing called... Absents makes the heart grow founder!! Give him a taste of what it like being a Sahm!!! I had to do that with my hubs when we were first married!! He now knows what it's like!!! He shows me how much he is thankful for me!! And I show him how much I am thankful for him! We both know that this house would not run with out the both of us!! Neither would r marriage! Good luck Hun!!!

Talk to him.