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Advice for Moms Advice for Moms

I am afraid strangers will judge me for...* Edited to add*

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Formula feeding. I know I can't do anything about the way people act, or think, but I hate being judged as it is. I know I will get dirty looks and whispers behind my back. I just wish I could wear a sign telling people why I am not breastfeeding the child in my arms. Just venting....thanks for listening.



Edit : Formula feeding isn't something we are doing by choice. We are foster parents, there isn't another choice. I think that is why I am so worried about what others think. That they will not understand.
Also, for those suggesting it, we are not allowed to give foster babies breast milk, or breast feed them. We aren't even allowed to give unpasturized cows milk. It is our agencies rules.
by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:16 PM
Replies (321-330):
Mommy2justone
by Mommy2justtwo on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:47 PM

I wish we could give our foster babies breast milk, because it is the best thing. I know formula feeding is okay, and they have it for a reason, and I was even fed formula as a baby. 
I think this just goes deeper than fearing judgement for me. But I am working on that.  

Quoting dustykitty:

Don't worry about what other people say about feeding your child formula.  Both my boys were fed formual because breastfeeding didn't work for me.  I know breastfeeding is probably the best thing for your child, but not all of can do it or want to do and our children turn out fine.  My mom formula fed both my brother and I and we are prefectly normal adults.


Mommy2justone
by Mommy2justtwo on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:47 PM

Thank you :)
This wasn't a choice really, so I think that makes it harder. 

Quoting pagirl1360:

Don't ever feel bad for the choices you make.  They don't know what your circumstances are and it is none of their damn business. 


Mommy2justone
by Mommy2justtwo on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:49 PM

I know

Quoting bmommyx2:

You really shouldn't worry about what others think.


azeventdiva
by on Jan. 29, 2013 at 7:12 PM

 Well that just sucks. Maybe they need to be educated about milk banks and the benefits of Breast Milk for all babies :)


Quoting Mommy2justone:

Even if we were adopting from foster care we wouldn't be able to give breastmilk till the adoption was final which would take at least 6 months.
And it is against our agency rules as well.
We aren't even allowed to give unpasterized cows milk, they are very very strict about this.  

Quoting azeventdiva:

 Well, if you're FOSTERING & not ADOPTING, then you can't nurse them. But, I would think you could still get breast milk from a milk bank & bottle feed.

 

Quoting Mommy2justone:

I would if I could. My Foster license could be terminated for nursing or giving breast milk to a foster baby


Quoting azeventdiva:

I understand, but since you are bringing it up, you obviously have a problem with it yourself. Maybe look into the other options, like milk banks or getting your milk supply in. Mom's who have never given birth & have adopted HAVE still breast fed their adopted children. There are things you can do to get that going. Contact your local Le Leche League for info on how to do this, if you're interested in that.

 

 



 

meepsm0m2006
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 7:43 AM
I didn't kno there were any alternatives?


Quoting doulala:

Quoting meepsm0m2006:

 my breast milk isn't as healthy for baby as formula

J/W-- are you also considering the alternatives to your milk (that are safer than commercial formula)?




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rojareb84
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 7:29 PM
I breastfed and formula fed. Forget everyone!! Enjoy your blessing!!!
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celticgodess
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:43 PM

You are a foster parent and you are worried about being judged?!  You are doing a wonderful thing!  Now get som self confidence (I say that lovingy - not mean!!) and raise that child and any others to the best of your ability while they are with you :)

Mommy2justone
by Mommy2justtwo on Feb. 1, 2013 at 6:55 PM

Thank you :) I plan on it!

Quoting celticgodess:

You are a foster parent and you are worried about being judged?!  You are doing a wonderful thing!  Now get som self confidence (I say that lovingy - not mean!!) and raise that child and any others to the best of your ability while they are with you :)


MJP76
by on Feb. 2, 2013 at 12:30 AM

I'm not sure why you are worried or care what others think.

dallas4nu
by on Feb. 2, 2013 at 2:29 AM
I honestly don't think ppl care or pay that much attention lol. I've never poked my dh and said, "omg look at that woman over there FORMULA FEEDING! oh the horror!". Seriously? Cmon now mama!

Plus, how could anyone know that was formula in the bottle? IF (that's a big if) ppl cared, they might assume you pump. I don't see the big deal.
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