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Concern re: my 4 yr old daughter

Posted by on Jan. 29, 2013 at 3:48 PM
  • 5 Replies

H! I have a 4 yr old daughter. She has always been very connected to me! I have been home with her since the day she was born. Yes, she has been exposed to play groups, MOPS, Sunday school and she is in preschool. I work 1-4 nights a week for 3 hrs as a PCA. My husband stays w/ our girls when I work. But, she often will say how much she will miss me. She shares this with a lot of people including teachers. I am not perfect and am always trying to better myself as a person and mom. With that being said, she will often say that she doesn't want me mad or frustrated. She will also ask if I will still be in her heart. I don't know where that comes from because she is always told how much I love her and even when I am not with her, I am in her heart. My husband has slight OCD, not diagnosed, and I wonder if his expectations are a bit high (we often share w/each other areas we need to work on). So, I wonder if unknowingly we/I put pressure on her to be "perfect" and is she fearful of always disappointing us/me. Do I not spend enough time with her anymore and she is trying to get my attention? (She also has difficulty going and staying in bed at night.) is she insecure? I don't know... Thoughts/ideas/suggestions....

by on Jan. 29, 2013 at 3:48 PM
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Replies (1-5):
carolina_gal
by Bronze Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 7:27 AM

 Hi there,

I found with my son he went through different phases of neediness.  Somedays he was completely dependent on me and other days he didn't want me to do anything for him.

Just assure her that you love her, are proud of her and continue to encourage her to make new friends and have new experiences without you.

breebree04
by on Jan. 30, 2013 at 9:01 AM

It might not be something you are doing. Your dd may just be like you said, insecure.  My daughter was like this and still is, she is 8. She is always saying she is a mamas girl. Shes always hugging on me and telling me she loves me. If Im gone for a couple hours she goes on and on about how much she missed me. She also still likes to sleep in bed with me, occassionally I let her but I dont make a habit of it. I think she is just insecure and she definately likes to be the center of attention

atlmom2
by Platinum Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 9:35 AM
This. Assure her and allow her to build self esteem.


Quoting breebree04:

It might not be something you are doing. Your dd may just be like you said, insecure.  My daughter was like this and still is, she is 8. She is always saying she is a mamas girl. Shes always hugging on me and telling me she loves me. If Im gone for a couple hours she goes on and on about how much she missed me. She also still likes to sleep in bed with me, occassionally I let her but I dont make a habit of it. I think she is just insecure and she definately likes to be the center of attention


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LuLuRex
by Bronze Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 5:09 PM

I totally agree with this too,


Quoting atlmom2:

This. Assure her and allow her to build self esteem.


Quoting breebree04:

It might not be something you are doing. Your dd may just be like you said, insecure.  My daughter was like this and still is, she is 8. She is always saying she is a mamas girl. Shes always hugging on me and telling me she loves me. If Im gone for a couple hours she goes on and on about how much she missed me. She also still likes to sleep in bed with me, occassionally I let her but I dont make a habit of it. I think she is just insecure and she definately likes to be the center of attention




bamababe1975
by Gold Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:17 AM

 I agree with the others. It could just be a phase or it could be that she's naturally insecure. You can help her with extra attention when you can and reassurance to build her up and make her more confident. :)


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