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How do you handle / discipline tantrums in a 17 month old??????

Posted by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 4:02 PM
  • 15 Replies

I have a 7 year old but she never really went through the tantrum stage. She is very even tempered and can get her to calm down very easily. But now my 17 year old is a total pistol. If she don't get her way, she cries and bows her back. I wouldn't let her play on my phone this morning and she got so mad she layed in the floor in the floor and cried. Well I then took her to room while I got dressed where she preceded to lay on my bed and cry. I think she cried for 30 minutes. t first I tried ignoring it but then after that long I was so tired of hearing thAt I yelled "hush" and she did quit. But I don't like having to do that! What is the bet way to handle it or discipline? I'm scared if I don't do something now, she will be the worse toddler ever! HELP!!!!!!!

by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 4:02 PM
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Mommy2justone
by Mommy2justtwo on Feb. 14, 2013 at 8:39 PM
5 moms liked this

What I usually did (and still do) with my daughter is : 
When she starts to get upset about something, I kneel down to her level and let her know that she can't (for instance) play with the phone right now, you can play with the phone if you are a good girl, later. Right now I want you to go play with your blocks while I get dressed.
And stand up and walk away.
If she starts to throw a fit, make sure she is safe, nothing around her, and not near stairs, and let her be. Don't take her with you. Don't pick her up. Let her throw her fit. When she is done, get at her level, (Don't talk AT her, talk TO her). Explain that it is okay to be angry, and that she must have felt very angry when she was throwing a fit, but that isn't how we show ANGRY. Then take her to her bedroom, give her her pillow, or a stuffed animal and squeeze it. Show her that when she is angry, she should go to her room and SQUEEZE the angry out. That is what Mommy wants you to do.

Good luck momma! 

ilana_ny
by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 8:46 PM

When my kids got this was, I just ignored it. If she is getting annoying:-) put her in her room and just let her cry. Sooner or latter she will realize that her crying would not get her anything. 

Amberleigh81
by Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 8:50 PM
I have a 16mo. I will let him cry for a few minutes if he is crazy crying, then hug him and talk to him about WHY he is mad - "You are mad because you can't have the dog leash". Then I tell him what he can have or do and that I love him, but crying and screaming is not the way to get what you want.

It works... sometimes. :)
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Jenni_Lynne71
by on Feb. 15, 2013 at 7:03 AM
I couldn't of said this better myself. GREAT advice!!!

Quoting Mommy2justone:

What I usually did (and still do) with my daughter is : 
When she starts to get upset about something, I kneel down to her level and let her know that she can't (for instance) play with the phone right now, you can play with the phone if you are a good girl, later. Right now I want you to go play with your blocks while I get dressed.
And stand up and walk away.
If she starts to throw a fit, make sure she is safe, nothing around her, and not near stairs, and let her be. Don't take her with you. Don't pick her up. Let her throw her fit. When she is done, get at her level, (Don't talk AT her, talk TO her). Explain that it is okay to be angry, and that she must have felt very angry when she was throwing a fit, but that isn't how we show ANGRY. Then take her to her bedroom, give her her pillow, or a stuffed animal and squeeze it. Show her that when she is angry, she should go to her room and SQUEEZE the angry out. That is what Mommy wants you to do.

Good luck momma! 

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pookie.bear2009
by on Feb. 15, 2013 at 9:39 AM

I am asking the same question about my 2 year old son. Except he will throw all the things off his bed at me.. If I "yell" hush or even just say that he goes to screaming even louder and pounding the floor harder. Have you tried possibly seperating her from you and putting her in time out?? or put her in time out but sit in the same room as her.. Most of the time he does cry it out and then falls asleep.

Quoting saysmom:

I have a 7 year old but she never really went through the tantrum stage. She is very even tempered and can get her to calm down very easily. But now my 17 year old is a total pistol. If she don't get her way, she cries and bows her back. I wouldn't let her play on my phone this morning and she got so mad she layed in the floor in the floor and cried. Well I then took her to room while I got dressed where she preceded to lay on my bed and cry. I think she cried for 30 minutes. t first I tried ignoring it but then after that long I was so tired of hearing thAt I yelled "hush" and she did quit. But I don't like having to do that! What is the bet way to handle it or discipline? I'm scared if I don't do something now, she will be the worse toddler ever! HELP!!!!!!!


LilliesValley
by on Feb. 15, 2013 at 9:43 AM
We usually put dd in time out up against the wall. Sometimes I'd let her just cry it out too. If I were changing I'd shut the bathroom door while I was changing. They want attention. Is also tell dd if she didn't give me ______ then the next time she wanted it she wouldn't get it. Sometimes its a mix of all or one. I also usually give one warning like if you keep crying you're going to be up against the wall.
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marisab
by on Feb. 15, 2013 at 10:02 AM

BUMP!

kirbymom
by Bronze Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 12:06 PM

Hi saysmom.  :)  

This should be nipped in the bud now, just like you are thinking.  You can do what you are already doing, but without yelling it. You just have to rememeber to calmly but very matter of factly in a strong voice tell her to stop that her behavior is unacceptable. Then if she doesn't stop, you either put her in her room as a time out and tell her she may come out when she is done throwing her temper tantrum or you may put her in a designated chair or couch and tell her the same thing about getting down when she is ready to quit throwing her temper tantrum. If she doesn't ask you if she can get down within a few minutes, you come back to her and ask her yourself, if she is done throwing her temper tantrum and tell her that this will happen again if she throws her temper again. You may have to repeat this several more times before she realizes that you mean business. She is only continuing to do it because she realizes that she can get you to break down eventually. But, if she sees that she can no longer break you down, she will learn to not throw her temper as much any more.  

la_bella_vita
by Gold Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 1:29 PM

 Good advice!

Quoting Mommy2justone:

What I usually did (and still do) with my daughter is : 
When she starts to get upset about something, I kneel down to her level and let her know that she can't (for instance) play with the phone right now, you can play with the phone if you are a good girl, later. Right now I want you to go play with your blocks while I get dressed.
And stand up and walk away.
If she starts to throw a fit, make sure she is safe, nothing around her, and not near stairs, and let her be. Don't take her with you. Don't pick her up. Let her throw her fit. When she is done, get at her level, (Don't talk AT her, talk TO her). Explain that it is okay to be angry, and that she must have felt very angry when she was throwing a fit, but that isn't how we show ANGRY. Then take her to her bedroom, give her her pillow, or a stuffed animal and squeeze it. Show her that when she is angry, she should go to her room and SQUEEZE the angry out. That is what Mommy wants you to do.

Good luck momma! 

 

JTE11
by Bronze Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 1:29 PM

It really helped me to read The Happiest Toddler on the Block...DD was wicked with her tantrums. We can head off most of them now so that's been a relief! She's always been difficult and hot-headed but this book pretty much saved my sanity.

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