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Help!!!

Posted by on Feb. 9, 2013 at 2:29 PM
  • 7 Replies

Hi im Jennifer and Im a teen mom and my sons bio father hasnt been in the picture since i was 3 months pregnant because i broke up with him because of good reasons but anyways im needing of some advice, when my son gets older hes going to think my boyfriend who has been with me since i was 6 months pregnant is his father, but I want to tell him that my boyfriend is not his biological father but its okay to call him daddy, but I want to tell him that his bio father is out there somewhere and I will help him find him if he wants me to, I just dont know how to tell him or if its such a good idea to tell him, because im going out for child support against his bio father because his bio father thinks my son is not his....I just dont know what to do, cn anyone that has been in the same position as me give me adivce or anyone could. 


THanks.

JEnnifer 

by on Feb. 9, 2013 at 2:29 PM
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Replies (1-7):
jillbailey26
by on Feb. 9, 2013 at 2:35 PM

If you're going for child support, you can request a DNA test.  That will settle that argument.

If it were me, I would be honest with my son about his biological father.  As you said, he can call your current boyfriend "daddy" because that's what he is to your son.  


"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification"  Romans 14:19

amonkeymom
by Silver Member on Feb. 9, 2013 at 4:41 PM

Welcome Jennifer!

I really wouldn't worry about it until he's older and starts questioning things.

Quoting teenmom2012164:

Hi im Jennifer and Im a teen mom and my sons bio father hasnt been in the picture since i was 3 months pregnant because i broke up with him because of good reasons but anyways im needing of some advice, when my son gets older hes going to think my boyfriend who has been with me since i was 6 months pregnant is his father, but I want to tell him that my boyfriend is not his biological father but its okay to call him daddy, but I want to tell him that his bio father is out there somewhere and I will help him find him if he wants me to, I just dont know how to tell him or if its such a good idea to tell him, because im going out for child support against his bio father because his bio father thinks my son is not his....I just dont know what to do, cn anyone that has been in the same position as me give me adivce or anyone could. 


THanks.

JEnnifer 


ceciliam
by Cecilia on Feb. 10, 2013 at 8:55 AM

Welcome to the group. I wouldn't worry about this right now, but when he is older, I would be honest with him.

JacksonGirl
by Member on Feb. 10, 2013 at 9:34 AM
Don't worry about explaining things to him right now but at the very first question of who's daddy be very honest and give him age appropriate answers. My BIL is not the Bio father of his oldest DD and he and his wife didn't tell her the truth until she was 13 even though she had asked questions earlier which they gave her silly answers to. She has big trust issues now and a lot of anger toward her parents now because she feels like so much was a lie. Be honest with you son when he starts with the questions and he grow up having always known the truth about daddy. I wish my in laws had done that maybe my niece would be a carefree happy girl now.
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bamababe1975
by Gold Member on Feb. 10, 2013 at 10:16 AM

 Hi Jennifer! Welcome to the group! I agree with the others. Wait until he's older and asks you. :)



nuts4scouts
by Bronze Member on Feb. 10, 2013 at 12:39 PM

Your child is 6 months old.

He will not begin to call anyone "daddy" for quite a while. On a side note, personally, I would not have a child of mine call any boyfriend of mine "daddy". Husband, yes, boyfriend, no.

He will not begin to question his parentage until a number of years after he starts speaking.

Take son's bio-father to court, and force him to help provide for the child he helped to create.

Give your son a loving, stable, household, and do not give him any siblings until you are MUCH older.

Good luck, being a teen mom is not an easy task.

Shygirl951
by Member on Feb. 10, 2013 at 2:34 PM
Please don't let that baby believe anyone is his father that may or may not stick around. I am also a teen mother with a friend who was in the same position as you are now. She let her daughter believe her bf was daddy, that lil girl was devastated when they broke up. And confused when a year later she tried to introduce her to her real father. Focus on enjoying your son for now, protect him from the hurt. He doesn't necessarily need someone to call daddy, just give him all your love.
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