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yelling

Posted by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 11:35 PM
  • 29 Replies

So my daughter is almost 2 and she is starting to act out, i hate yelling at her (lately its seems like thats all i'm doing) my fiance is so much better at dealling with her temper tantrums then i am. Is there any way to deal with her and my temper? so i dont feel like i'm yelling all the time?

by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 11:35 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Mommy2justone
by Mommy2justtwo on Feb. 14, 2013 at 11:39 PM
1 mom liked this
Count to 10 in your head. Then calmly talk to her.
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NicholeJirik
by Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 11:44 PM

I'll try it :)

Quoting Mommy2justone:

Count to 10 in your head. Then calmly talk to her.



frndlyfn
by Platinum Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 12:05 AM

Take a deep breath and if you need to , walk away for a few moments.   What things in particular are setting you off?  We do 10 deep breaths if dd or i feel out of control.  It helps calm your adrenaline down and center your thoughts to where they should be.

NicholeJirik
by Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 12:36 AM

what sets me off the most is her not listening. it doesnt help that my parents undermind everything i do (I say no thay say yes sort of thing)

alexis_06
by AnnaLisa on Feb. 15, 2013 at 1:46 AM

 yikes..sound like you need to have a talk with your parents.  my mom used to do that, and it drove me craaaazy!   are they around alot?  you need to make sure you remind them that they have raised their kids, now its your turn.

as for the yelling, as other said, take a few deep breathes beforehand.  it should hopefully help a lil bit :)

Quoting NicholeJirik:

what sets me off the most is her not listening. it doesnt help that my parents undermind everything i do (I say no thay say yes sort of thing)

 

NicholeJirik
by Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 9:53 AM

i'v tried talking to them, nothing has changed, thay pull the "i'm the grandparent i can spoil her if i want and there is nothing you can do about it" <--- actual quote from my dad.


Quoting alexis_06:

 yikes..sound like you need to have a talk with your parents.  my mom used to do that, and it drove me craaaazy!   are they around alot?  you need to make sure you remind them that they have raised their kids, now its your turn.

as for the yelling, as other said, take a few deep breathes beforehand.  it should hopefully help a lil bit :)

Quoting NicholeJirik:

what sets me off the most is her not listening. it doesnt help that my parents undermind everything i do (I say no thay say yes sort of thing)

 



Roo1234
by Bronze Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 9:54 AM

How are you approaching her when she doesn't listen?  

Do you look her in the eye with gentle physical contact, or do you speak to her from across the room?  

Do you constantly tell her "No", or do you look for ways to redirect her to appropriate activites that you can say "Yes" to?  

Do you give her more than one chance to "listen"--repeating yourself along the way, or do you make your expectations clear the first time by physically redirecting her?

Often times we, as parents, are training the child to not listen because we don't communicate in a way that is clear to the developmental stage of the child.  You might reduce frustrations for both of you by changing the way you approach each situation.

Quoting NicholeJirik:

what sets me off the most is her not listening. it doesnt help that my parents undermind everything i do (I say no thay say yes sort of thing)



gizmo538
by Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 9:57 AM

 Yeah, that happened last night and I ripped my dad a new one while my DH went and physically took DD away from him. What did my dad do? DD was throwing a tantrum because she wanted to go outside, so he took her outside with no shoes, no socks and no jacket. It was very cold last night. Granted, he carried her the whole time but the point is, we said no. Put your foot down, Momma. If you don't put a stop to it now then as she gets older the only thing she'll learn is that if you say no, just ask the grandparents.

Quoting NicholeJirik:

what sets me off the most is her not listening. it doesnt help that my parents undermind everything i do (I say no thay say yes sort of thing)

 

We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams.
TerriAnne2606
by on Feb. 15, 2013 at 10:25 AM

Time outs.  For her, not you.  LOL  They work wonders.  

DaniandTom
by Bronze Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 10:33 AM

So stop yelling! It obviously isn't having any effect on her and it's stressing you out and making you feel bad about how you parent her. Instead of yelling, pick her up and carry her to time out. If she tries to get up, gently but firmly put her back down. Don't raise your voice. In fact, whisper. When you whisper she will have to quiet down to hear you. Also, make sure you're telling her what her punishment is. To a 2 yr old, a minute or two in time out is an eternity! Sit her down and make her stay and when the time is up, let her know if she starts doing XYZ again, she will be back in time out. And remember...this too, shall pass. ♥Hugs♥

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